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Butt Made Of Gold

(Translated by: RenRen, Edited by: Bon-Chan, Proofread by: Panie)

"San WangYe, don't embarrass the old housekeeper… The person who burned the kitchen may seem as far as the end of the earth, but that person may actually be right in front of your eyes…"

"……" It's her again? Why can't this woman have even a short moment of quiet?

Long YuTian's long black flowy sleeves were brandished as he let out a loud roar towards the door, "GUARDS—"

Qian DuoDuo instantly thought that it was bad and promptly cut him off, "Don't call the guards!!! WangYe, listens to my explanation… That… I didn't burn your kitchen on purpose, I was thinking that you must be tired after such arduous hard work last night… I wanted to stew a tortoise or something for you… To reinforce your kidney and strengthen your body… Unexpectedly, I wasn't careful and took the oil as water… pouring it to the ground…"

While Qian DuoDuo spoke, she also brandished her long sleeves like she was performing in an opera, vividly demonstrating Long YuTian's arduous man-and-woman-play.

"Pffft!!!" Some people snorted.

Bastard! Really a tactless man! Don't you see that this great aunt's butt is about to bloom [1]?

Once Long YuTian heard her, he thought that this woman always talked about his private matter. Now, she even said in front of so many people that she wanted to help him reinforce his kidney and strengthen his body. Wasn't it a roundabout way of saying he wasn't capable enough?

Long YuTian burned with fury. He glared ruthlessly at this woman, a woman who had repeatedly humiliated him, and let out a bone-chilling roar, "GUARDS! Take this woman and—"

"I've already said don't! You're a high-above WangYe, how can you be so stingy? Isn't it only a kitchen? Compensating you will do…" Finished speaking, Qian DuoDuo casually rummaged through her long skirt and threw the little pouch Xiao Ruo had just embroidered for her on the table.

Long YinTian was curious. What kind of rare treasure does this woman have? Such a confident tone.

There are a lot of rare and delicious foods inside San WangYe's kitchen. Even the imperial kitchen in the palace couldn't be on par with it.

He stood up and walked to Qian DuoDuo's side, raising his hand to pick up the pouch and pour all of the things inside of it out. The next second, he was completely dumbfounded…

What are these…? Broken jade pendant… Pieces of broken silver… and there's still an old-fashioned silver hairpin…

"Qian DuoDuo, this is your compensation?" Long YinTian's mouth was wide open like he was ready to swallow an egg…

"Not enough?" A certain woman asked. And then, seeing that everyone in the hall was watching the things on the table torn between crying and laughing, she felt unusually discouraged, "These are all of my belongings… If these aren't enough, then I'll just press my luck and let you hit me twenty times! Every hit is worth one thousand tael[2], good enough right?"

One thousand tael = one thousand dollars… the conversion should be like this, right?

Suddenly, just like there was an explosion, everyone's heads were dizzy from the blow…

Is Qian DuoDuo's butt made of gold?

"Ke ke(cough)…" Long MuChen couldn't help but cough after he heard San WangYe's clenched fists making creaking sounds and saw his complexion turn ashen.

(If you are not reading this story on Renren's WordPress or Wattpad page, then you're reading a stolen material; I hope you can just read on my page, it's free of charge and free of virus. To those people and web's admins who copied-pasted my translations, I wish you a whole life of fungi-infested-armpits and bald-scabious-head.) — RenRen —

Although all of them were aristocrats and members of the Imperial family, they had never bickered like this with a woman. However, this kind of extremely infuriating woman like Qian DuoDuo was the first they have ever met.

Lao San got really angry while Qian DuoDuo once again showed a confused expression. Thus, he had to really become the mediator.

"It's late already, Ben… Ben GongZi will leave first. You guys don't have to send me." Long MuChen, neither too quickly nor too slowly, stood up. The corners of his lips somewhat rose as his wide, beautiful eyes swept a quick glance at Qian DuoDuo. He smiled without saying anything and strode towards the gate.

Even though he said there was no need to see him off, Long YuTian and his Si Di still respectfully sent him out of San wangfu. Only after they watched him get onto the fragrant white jade carriage did the two brothers finally separate, each going their respective way.


[1] Blooming butt (屁股开花/pìgukāihuā): (This is not an idiom, let me repeat, this is not an idiom) It's Qian DuoDuo's way to say her butt is about to get beaten. Her butt would be red (from swelling or bleeding) like a blooming flower from being beaten. [2] Tael (两/liǎng): ancient Chinese weight and currency, one tael is around 40 grams of silver (ancient times).


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