EGOTISM. A LETTER TO J. T. BECHER. [1]
[Greek: Heauton bur_on aeidei.]
1.
If Fate should seal my Death to-morrow, (Though much _I_ hope she will _postpone_ it,) I've held a share _Joy_ and _Sorrow_, Enough for _Ten_; and _here_ I _own_ it.
2.
I've lived, as many others live, And yet, I think, with more enjoyment; For could I through my days again live, I'd pass them in the 'same' employment.
3.
That 'is' to say, with 'some exception', For though I will not make confession, I've seen too much of man's deception Ever again to trust profession.
4.
Some sage 'Mammas' with gesture haughty, Pronounce me quite a youthful Sinner-- But 'Daughters' say, "although he's naughty, You must not check a 'Young Beginner'!"
5.
I've loved, and many damsels know it-- But whom I don't intend to mention, As 'certain stanzas' also show it, 'Some' say 'deserving Reprehension'.
6.
Some ancient Dames, of virtue fiery, (Unless Report does much belie them,) Have lately made a sharp Enquiry, And much it 'grieves' me to 'deny' them.
7.
Two whom I lov'd had 'eyes' of 'Blue', To which I hope you've no objection; The 'Rest' had eyes of 'darker Hue'-- Each Nymph, of course, was 'all perfection'.
8.
But here I'll close my 'chaste' Description, Nor say the deeds of animosity; For 'silence' is the best prescription, To 'physic' idle curiosity.
9.
Of 'Friends' I've known a 'goodly Hundred'-- For finding 'one' in each acquaintance, By 'some deceived', by others plunder'd, 'Friendship', to me, was not 'Repentance'.
10.
At 'School' I thought like other 'Children'; Instead of 'Brains', a fine Ingredient, 'Romance', my 'youthful Head bewildering', To 'Sense' had made me disobedient.
11.
A victim, 'nearly' from affection, To certain 'very precious scheming', The still remaining recollection Has 'cured' my 'boyish soul' of 'Dreaming'.
12.
By Heaven! I rather would forswear The Earth, and all the joys reserved me, Than dare again the 'specious Snare', From which 'my Fate' and 'Heaven preserved' me.
13.
Still I possess some Friends who love me-- In each a much esteemed and true one; The Wealth of Worlds shall never move me To quit their Friendship, for a new one.
14.
But Becher! you're a 'reverend pastor', Now take it in consideration, Whether for penance I should fast, or Pray for my 'sins' in expiation.
15.
I own myself the child of 'Folly', But not so wicked as they make me-- I soon must die of melancholy, If 'Female' smiles should e'er forsake me.
16.
'Philosophers' have 'never doubted', That 'Ladies' Lips' were made for 'kisses!'
For 'Love!' I could not live without it, For such a 'cursed' place as 'This is'.
17.