Who reads false quantities in Seale, [5]
Or puzzles o'er the deep triangle; Depriv'd of many a wholesome meal; [xi]
In _barbarous Latin_ [6] doom'd to wrangle:
12.
Renouncing every pleasing page, From authors of historic use; Preferring to the letter'd sage, The square of the hypothenuse. [7]
13.
Still, harmless are these occupations, [xii]
That hurt none but the hapless student, Compar'd with other recreations, Which bring together the imprudent;
14.
Whose daring revels shock the sight, When vice and infamy combine, When Drunkenness and dice invite, [xiii]
As every sense is steep'd in wine.
15.
Not so the methodistic crew, Who plans of reformation lay: In humble attitude they sue, And for the sins of others pray:
16.
Forgetting that their pride of spirit, Their exultation in their trial, [xiv]
Detracts most largely from the merit Of all their boasted self-denial.
17.
'Tis morn:--from these I turn my sight: What scene is this which meets the eye?
A numerous crowd array'd in white, [8]
Across the green in numbers fly.
18.
Loud rings in air the chapel bell; 'Tis hush'd:--what sounds are these I hear?
The organ's soft celestial swell Rolls deeply on the listening ear.
19.
To this is join'd the sacred song, The royal minstrel's hallow'd strain; Though _he_ who hears the _music_ long, [xv]
Will _never_ wish to _hear again_.
20.
Our choir would scarcely be excus'd, E'en as a band of raw beginners; All mercy, now, must be refus'd [xvi]
To such a set of croaking sinners.
21.
If David, when his toils were ended, Had heard these blockheads sing before him, To us his psalms had ne'er descended,-- In furious mood he would have tore 'em.
22.
The luckless Israelites, when taken By some inhuman tyrant's order, Were ask'd to sing, by joy forsaken, On Babylonian river's border.
23.
Oh! had they sung in notes like these [xvii]
Inspir'd by stratagem or fear, They might have set their hearts at ease, The devil a soul had stay'd to hear.
24.
But if I scribble longer now, [xviii]
The deuce a soul will _stay to read_; My pen is blunt, my ink is low; 'Tis almost time to _stop_, _indeed_.
25.
Therefore, farewell, old _Granta's_ spires!
No more, like _Cleofas_, I fly; No more thy theme my Muse inspires: The reader's tir'd, and so am I.
October 28, 1806.
[Footnote 1: The motto was prefixed in 'Hours of Idleness'.
"Fight with silver spears" ('i.e'. with bribes), "and them shall prevail in all things."]
[Footnote 2: The 'Diable Boiteux' of Le Sage, where Asmodeus, the demon, places Don Cleofas on an elevated situation, and unroofs the houses for inspection. [Don Cleofas, clinging to the cloak of Asmodeus, is carried through the air to the summit of S. Salvador.]
[Footnote 3: On the death of Pitt, in January, 1806, Lord Henry Petty beat Lord Palmerston in the contest for the representation of the University of Cambridge in Parliament.]
[Footnote 4: Probably Lord Henry Petty. See variant iii.]