A thrill tickled him like the passage of a spider across his neck. "No!"
Mike grabbed his shoulders. "You must have been the last person to see her before the rapist."
On those words his mother swept into the room, her red silk robe fluttering behind her. "Leave him alone!" She was not her usual self. She looked like she hadn't slept in a month; her face was a mask.
"Mary, I'm trying to console our boy. His date was raped tonight at the Spirit."
Mary forced her featured into a grimace. "No," she blurted. "That's crazy!"
"It happened."
Jonathan saw an ocean of pity in his mother's eyes. She reached out to him, then stopped. She looked from Jonathan to Mike and back again. She was silent.
Jonathan's mind returned to his dream. In it he had been raping somebody. And those vast rows of tree trunks, those crosses-the dream jungle could easily have been a real-life church.
The memory of how very much he had enjoyed hurting her made him reject Mike's comforting hug and scramble to his feet in panic. He wanted to run, to hide, to somehow escape the red fire of insane anger within him.
Mike enclosed his arm in a powerful hand. "That's okay, son, take it easy. Take it easy, now."
He couldn't do that-not after glimpsing a monster in the shadows of his soul. Frantically he tried to stifle the terror. Dad obviously thought he was grief-stricken. How could he say that the right emotion was dread?
He decided that the impression of rape was more than a dream. It was almost a memory. Maybe this is the way psychopaths discover their crimes.
"Dad-"
How could he say it? While she was being raped I was dreaming about raping her? Funny coincidence, right, Dad?
"Come on, son, I'll drive you over to the hospital."
"You'll leave him right here, Mike Banion! Look at him. He's overwrought! You wake him up in the middle of the night, drag him out of bed-"
"Oh, darlin'. Pat was his girl."
"One date! And I arranged it."
At last Jonathan pulled himself together enough to talk. He had to tell them, he could not keep the coincidence of his dream a secret. He worked his throat, trying to get the words out. "I had a bad dream-my God, I had a bad dream! It's-no. It's impossible-but I dreamed I was raping her. I was dreaming it when you woke me up!"
"Come on, son, take it easy, now."
"Jonathan, you don't know what you're saying! Mike, he's not awake yet. You can see that!"
"Listen to me! I dreamed this. I did did dream it." He faced Mike. "Dad, you have to put me on the polygraph, and do it right now." dream it." He faced Mike. "Dad, you have to put me on the polygraph, and do it right now."
"The hell I will," Mike roared. "No way are you going on the poly!"
"I am a prime prime suspect, Dad. I was the last person to see her." suspect, Dad. I was the last person to see her."
"For God's sake, the poly can lie. What if I got a posi-tive?"
"You'd do what you have to."
"Son-oh, son-are you-it almost sounds like-are you confessing this crime?"
"Mike, if you do this-if you dare dare-" She fell silent, her face burning with fear and rage.
Mike ignored her, regarded Jonathan sadly. "Don't tell me (his, Johnny."
Jonathan felt in that moment the most profound pity for his stepfather. "If I'd gotten hold of you in time,"Mike had once said, "I'd have made you a cop. Such a cop." He'd cuffed Jonathan. "You'd've been a great cop." Poor Mike, all tangled up in his dreams of the son he'd never had. His first wife had died before they could afford children, so twenty-two-year-old Jonathan was taking the place of the unborn. Of course there was no question of Mary giving him children. She'd had a hysterectomy years ago.
"Mike, you've got to face it. I've got to go on the poly. Especially Especially because I'm your stepson. If you didn't know me personally, I'd be a prime suspect-dream or no dream- just because I was the last person known to have been with her. I'd be down at the precinct under questioning right now." because I'm your stepson. If you didn't know me personally, I'd be a prime suspect-dream or no dream- just because I was the last person known to have been with her. I'd be down at the precinct under questioning right now."
"Hell, I'd know in a second you didn't do it. I've been a detective a damn long time, kid. And I know you didn't do it. My goddamn trick knee tells me." He cuffed Jonathan's shoulder. "The poor girl is really banged up. A stringbean like you couldn'ta done it."
Then why did I dream what I dreamed?
"If I weren't your son, you'd request a poly as a matter of routine. It'd be your duty then, and it's your duty now."
Mike's face clouded. Jonathan had him cornered. The truth was obvious. "I'll call the precinct, get an operator outa bed," Mike muttered. He started to go heavily down the stairs. At the landing he paused. He looked back, the hall light gleaming on his glasses, his skin the color of dirty flour. "Goddamn, I just had a thought. If we were out on the lease, we'd be gettin' up just about now. I can smell that coffee, son."
Mike's hunting lease was his personal version of paradise. The two of them had good times there, despite Jonathan's total inability to fire after he had aimed. He couldn't under-stand killing for fun. The pleasure of the hunt did not seem justification for stealing a life. For him, getting the buck in his sights was enough. "I'll be ready in a minute." He went to his closet, began to get dressed.
Mother followed Jonathan into his room, talked to him as he put on his clothes. "Don't you realize he thinks you're guilty? He'll make that test read any way he wants it to read!"
"Mother, for heaven's sake, I asked asked for the test." for the test."
She dropped her voice. "He's clever. If I didn't know better, I'd say I had committed the ultimate error of marry-ing an Inquisitor."
"A who?"
She blinked away annoyance. "Just a figure of speech. Remember that a policeman's first concern is solving his case. Getting the right man is entirely secondary."
"Mike would never take advantage like that. It isn't his way."
"I'm the one who loves you, Jonathan. You're my child and it's my obligation to protect you." Her hands fluttered helplessly before her face. "His affection-if you can even call it that-is ordinary. Just ordinary." the one who loves you, Jonathan. You're my child and it's my obligation to protect you." Her hands fluttered helplessly before her face. "His affection-if you can even call it that-is ordinary. Just ordinary."
She clutched at him. "You're so brilliant, so good-he has no idea what you are. He's a barbarian."
"Why did you marry him then? I don't think you've ever loved him, have you?"
"That isn't your business. I had a good reason for marry-ing Mike. Better than you can imagine."
"And I have a good reason for taking the polygraph."
"I can't stop you, can I?"
"Not really, Mother."
"So put your shirt on and go take your beloved polygraph and God help you! You can defy me all you want. I can't stop you." She swept out, head high, fists clenched. There were tears starting in her eyes.
Poor Mother. There was so much about her own son that she did not understand.
I am a gentle man who dreams like a monster. am a gentle man who dreams like a monster.
He went down the stairs, found Mike standing in the kitchen.
Mike's face was tight with embarrassment. "The poly operator's waiting." He walked quietly behind Jonathan into the garage. But the moment the door closed he began to argue again. "For God's sake, Johnny, the girl is over at that hospital and we're wasting time. She needs a friend right now. Let me take you to her. Forget the damn polygraph- nobody suspects you, least of all me."
Jonathan paused beside the car. A quiet, firm voice spoke within: There is something wrong with you, There is something wrong with you, and now is the time to find out what it is. and now is the time to find out what it is.
"Do it for me, Dad."
That statement brought a cuff that made Jonathan's ear ring. He sat down in the cigar-cured old Dodge and wished that Mike would for once remember his strength. "Sorry, Johnny. Sorry. It's just-I know my own job. Don't tell me my job. And I don't want to polygraph you."
Jonathan had to be more specific with Mike; there was no way around it. "Dad, I was having a very strange dream when you woke me up. I was dreaming that I had raped Patricia. Violently. In a church."
Mike got into the Dodge. For a moment he was silent. Then he slammed his hands against the steering wheel. "Coincidence."
"What if I'm a psychopath and don't know it?"
"Rare. Chance in a million."
"It happens, Dad."
"I know it happens! But it isn't happening to you. You're the scientific genius in the family. You'd know know it if you were a psycho." He looked at Jonathan. There was fear in his eyes. "Wouldn't you?" it if you were a psycho." He looked at Jonathan. There was fear in his eyes. "Wouldn't you?"
"There are blank areas in my memory."
"Big deal. There are blank areas in my memory too. You're a good kid-I mean, don't go getting a swelled head if you get a compliment from the inspector, but I know a good kid when I see one. You live clean, you work hard. This dream stuff is damn foolishness. Everybody has crazy dreams now and then.You don't know where they come from. Men are violent. That's a fact. Hell, I ought to run you in for wasting police time with false leads or somethin'. God, do I wish that was a crime. Our job'd be cut in half.But that's neither here nor there. The point is, that girl was brutally raped, Jonathan. Could you really hurt somebody that way? You can't even shoot a deer, deer, for Chrissake. You have less killer instinct than any man I've ever known. Take my word for it, kid." for Chrissake. You have less killer instinct than any man I've ever known. Take my word for it, kid."
"The nicest people are often the most repressed, the kind who chop their families to bits, then can't remember a thing about it. It takes years of psychotherapy to uncover the monster inside."
Mike started the car, pulled out into the soft early morn-ing, into the quiet of Kew Gardens. There had been rain before dawn, and dew now gleamed in the sunlight, sparkling leaves and grass, shining on the street and the roofs of the tall, elegant houses.
As they drove along Jonathan suffered another wave of anguish over Patricia. What nameless horror had befallen her?
If I raped her I'll commit suicide.
As they went from Kew out onto Queens Boulevard Jonathan felt in himself something almost filthy, as if a rotten, evil presence had crawled through his soul and left greasy stains behind.
His whole life might be coming apart.
Mike lit a cigar, his sallow skin glowing briefly in the lighter flame. From time to time he glanced in Jonathan's direction. Pain seemed to ooze from Mike's sweat-gleaming brow, from his hunched shoulders, his betrayed face.
His faith in me had finally been shaken a little.
Cold crept into Jonathan's bones. The dawn hour was a time when one's body seemed to hold less tightly to life. He huddled into his thin jacket.
The 112th precinct house was a modern building, all gray tile and glass. Jonathan had never been inside.
Mike's work-places-indeed his habits, even his friends-were mostly kept from his stepson. Despite Mike's occasional suggestion that Jonathan become a cop, he kept his police associations separate.
"Hardasses," he would say. "You wouldn't go for 'em."
Mike pulled the car into a no-parking zone in front of the station. One thing New York City police officials do not have is parking problems. As soon as the car stopped Jonathan got out.
"Hold it. Just wait a minute." Mike took his stepson's arm. "Look, you aren't any kind of a suspect or anything like that. Nobody even knows you're gonna be on the poly, and nothin's goin' in the record unless-"
He stopped.
"Come on, Dad. Let's get it over with."
He followed Mike through an empty waiting room, past a desk sergeant with permanently raised eyebrows, and into a steel-clad elevator that whined horribly when it started moving.
On the third floor there were offices, the largest among them Mike Banion's. When they went inside, a tall, cadaver-ous man rose to his feet. " 'Morning, Blake," Mike mut-tered. "Sorry to bring you down here at this hour."
"No problem, Inspector. Glad to do it." He glanced at Jonathan. "This the suspect?"
"Not a suspect."
Blake regarded Jonathan with neutrality so complete it was chilling. "Got the booking papers?"
"This is a voluntary. Off the goddamn record, see?"
"How do I record the polygraph use, then? It's gotta be on the record, especially with this portable unit. If we were down at the Police Academy with the fixed installation it'd be easier. A lot of uses on that thing.But this-nobody ever takes it out."
"Then say you were testing it. Making sure it still Works." He paused a moment. "Look, Blake, you're gonna find out when you work up the questions, so I'm telling you now that this is my stepson, Jonathan. He had the misfortune to be the last respectable person to be seen with a very nice young lady named Patricia Murray who was raped after he left her. So we're down here clearing him."
The polygraph operator's face closed down tight. He was already in the middle of this. He obviously thought he ought to keep as low a profile as possible.
They left Mike's pin-perfect office with its gleaming oak desk and wall of citations and awards, and went down the hall to a small inner room that smelled of stale cigarette smoke and was dominated by an electronic apparatus on a table beside an old-fashioned office chair.
A young policeman had appeared in the hall behind them. He followed them into the room and began going through a file cabinet.
"Out, patrolman," Mike snapped.
"But, sir, I've got to-"
"Get the hell out! This is private!"
The young cop hurried to the door. Jonathan looked around at the police equipment. He recognized the elec-trodes and wires of a skin galvanometer. He understood the principle of the polygraph; the devices he worked with in his own lab were far more sophisticated versions of the same system.
As soon as he saw how primitive the police machine really was he began to doubt the effectiveness of this session. Perhaps this was all just a waste of time and emotional energy.
Mike was staring at the door. "Who was that guy, Blake, a rookie?"
"Musta been. Never saw him before."
"Got his uniform all screwed up. Notice that?"