ANGELA.
You're abilities obviously dwarf the rest of us. Can you tell us how you became Metallo?
METALLO.
I wish I could but most of it's a blur to me. I remember being in a car accident and rescued by someone on the outskirts of the city. I was almost dead and this man, a scientist, saved my life. Unfortunately the scientist died soon after so there is a lot that's unexplained even to me. I'm not sure what he did to me but I'm just glad to be alive. I feel better now than I ever have.
ANGELA.
The talk of the town is that if you hadn't assisted Superman with the monorail, hundreds could have died and possibly Superman. Do you believe Superman is weakening?
METALLO.
Stopping that train wasn't easy. I know. Maybe there are some jobs that require more than Superman.
ANGELA.
Is that your way of saying you plan on replacing Metropolis' Marvel?
METALLO.
Definitely not. Superman is a hero to me as he is everyone in Metropolis, if not the world. Look, Metropolis is a big town. There are eleven million people here and I think there is more than enough room for the both of us. I bet the guy could use a vacation.
Forced laughter from CHEN.
METALLO.
Now if you don't mind, I'd like to make sure these guys get taken off and I still have to clean up this mess.
ANGELA.
Thanks for your time. We have a CALLER. CALLER you're on the air with Professor HAMILTON.
CALLER (VO).
(very inarticulate) I seen Sooperman in action and I don't believe you guys is writin' his death certificate already and puttin' that Metallo guy on yer shoulders. The guy didn't catch a train for Pete's sake! He's always been there when it mattered.
Maybe the guy didn't get enough sleep or he's got some kinda twenty-five hour bug or somethin'.
ANGELA.
(confused) Oh-kay. We have another CALLER with an opposing view.
Go CALLER.
LUTHOR (VO).
You really must develop a better screening process.
ANGELA.
Is this Lex Luthor?
LUTHOR (VO).
Yes it is.
ANGELA.
What an unexpected pleasure. Metropolis' favorite entrepreneur. Can I call you Lex?
LUTHOR (VO).
No.
(Beat) I agree with Metallo. There is room in Metropolis for two heroes. I think underestimating Metallo may be a grave mistake. To put so much trust in one person can only be dangerous. At least we know Metallo is human unlike Superman who hides his origin. Exactly what do we know about Superman in the few years he's been here.
CALLER (VO).
I know he can kick your bald ass clear to Otisburg-- LUTHOR (VO).
(confused) Otisburg?
CALLER (VO).
Yeah you- LUTHOR (VO).
Otisburg?
CALLER (VO).
Tell you what Luther...
LUTHOR (VO).
Lu-thor.
CALLER (VO).
Dumbass! Why don't you come out of that fancy glass house and you and me can do a little one on one in yer front yard or ain't you got the rocks?
ANGELA.
Okay, I think that will be enough and we'll be back after this commercial break.
INT. DAILY PLANET.
Several staffers are gathered around the wall-mounted television and break up when the LEXAIR commercial starts. In the background, CLARK is at his desk handwriting a letter. LOIS is seated across from him. JIMMY approaches. JIMMY Did you see Metallo on the news? Man, is he something or what?
(looking over LOIS' shoulder and pointing) There's a "k" in "panicked."
LOIS smacks his hand... HARD. CLARK sneezes. LOIS instinctively hands him a box of tissue.
CLARK.
Thank you.
CLARK reaches for the box and LOIS draws it back.
LOIS.
What was that?
JIMMY.
(slightly confused) Mister Kent sneezed.
LOIS.
Are you sick, Smallville?
CLARK.
A little under the weather. Probably something going around.
LOIS.
In June?
She hands him the box.
LOIS.
I've never seen you sick, Clark. I thought they built all you country boys big and strong.
JIMMY.
That's true, Mister Kent. Wow. You're quick, Miss Lane.
LOIS.
I'm a reporter, Jimmy. I notice things.
CAT GRANT shouts from her desk on the other side of the room.
CAT.
HAS ANYBODY NOTICED IF METALLO IS WEARING A WEDDING RING?.
CLARK.
I haven't been feeling well. I'm probably best I go home and get some rest.
CAT approaches. CLARK puts his letter in an envelope and hands it to JIMMY.
CLARK.
Jimmy, could you take this down to the mail room.
JIMMY.
Sure thing, Mister Kent.
CAT takes it from JIMMY.
CAT.
Lana Lang?
LOIS.
A letter? Let me guess your pigeons haven't come back yet? You know, with emails, faxes and if you really want to be a Neanderthal you could always use the telephone.
CAT.
I think it's sweet. I can't remember when the last time somebody wrote something for me. Why can't I meet a nice guy?
JIMMY.
Didn't Bruce Wayne serve you with a restraining order?
CAT.
That was four years ago and I am feeling much better now, thank you.
(Beat) Any good dirt I should know about, Clark?
LOIS.
Kent doesn't have any dirt. He's going to go home and make some soup from a Kent recipe that's been in the family for six generations and huddle down with a quilt and Frank Capra movie that would make me wretch. Aren't you, Kent?
CLARK.
Seven generations.
JIMMY.
I thought you had visitors tonight, Mister Kent. Isn't that why you're letting Miss Lane interview Mayor Berkowitz?