[DICK _comes in as she speaks._
DICK.
My dear lady, you're as epigrammatic as a dramatist. Do you say such things from choice or necessity?
LADY KELSEY.
_Dick!_
BOULGER.
Dick!
MRS. CROWLEY.
Mr. Lomas!
CARBERY.
Ah!
[_The four exclamations are simultaneous._
DICK.
This enthusiasm at my appearance is no less gratifying than unexpected.
LADY KELSEY.
I'm so glad you've come at last. Now we shall get at the truth.
BOULGER.
[_Impatiently._] Well?
DICK.
My dear people, what _are_ you talking about?
BOULGER.
Oh, don't be such an ass!
MRS. CROWLEY.
Good heavens, didn't you read the _Times_ this morning?
DICK.
I only came back from Paris to-night. Besides, I never read the papers except in August.
MRS. CROWLEY.
[_Raising her eyebrows._] When there's nothing in them?
DICK.
Pardon me, I'm an eager student of the sea-serpent and the giant gooseberry.
LADY KELSEY.
My dear Dick, it's too shocking. I wish I'd had the courage to write and ask Mr. Mackenzie not to come. But since you both came back from Africa a month ago he's been here nearly every day. And he's been so good and kind to us, I couldn't treat him as though there was no doubt the story was true.
BOULGER.
There can't be the least doubt about it. By George, I should like to kick him.
DICK.
[_Dryly._] My dear chap, Alec is a hardy Scot and bigger than you, so I shouldn't advise you to try.
BOULGER.
I was engaged to dine with him to-night, but I wired to say I had a headache.
LADY KELSEY.
What will he think if he sees you here?
BOULGER.
He can think what he jolly well likes.
LADY KELSEY.
I hope he has the sense to stay away.
CARBERY.
I think you're pretty safe now, Lady Kelsey. It's growing late.
DICK.
Will some one kindly explain?
MRS. CROWLEY.
D'you mean to say you really don't know--seriously? After all, you were with him.