I swore that I was not having an obsession of dating old man; I just like a man who likes a father. Before I knew Xiao Cheng, I kept on believing that: "If I could marry to someone that is older than me seven to eight years old, he will see me as his daughter and spoil me forever. Then my life will be perfect."
But I am attracted by someone that is two years younger than me, why is that. All along I couldn't understand it.
A long time ago, Xiao Cheng told me the answer: "Because in my body there's something that could seduce you, it is something that you lack of."
I asked: "Is it IQ?"
He said: "No, it's heart…."
Under the persistent of Xiao Cheng, I kept my promise. I treated him a meal in the restaurant beside the Z apartment. The restaurant is a small, yet the dishes are very delicious.
At first I also asked Zhuo Zhuo to join ask, for giving Xiao Cheng a chance. Who knew the time we went out, Zhuo Zhuo's high school friend called and wanted to come to T university to borrow some books from her. Zhuo Zhuo decided to stay at the dorm to wait for him.
With a little loss and slight happiness, I and Xiao Cheng had our first dinner.
Xiao Cheng was not really talkative, and I am not someone that likes an awkward situation so I kept on looking for topics to talk. For all the topics, I could talk it endless.
I asked him: "What is your secret of your excellent skill in playing card?"
He said: "It's very easy. Remember everyone give out what kind of cards, then I will count what is the remaining card.
This is "very easy"?
With a praising tone, I asked him again: "Wow it's so great! Then you never lost?"
"Of course I've lost. Perhaps it's because of bad luck or I was in the time with someone that play like a pig, for example the time I asked you out for a movie."
"O, if you don't say about this, maybe I will forget it."
He was speechless: "It seems that Titanic is too bland that you already forgot about it."
Talking about cards, I then said to him: "Your friends are quite cruel. You just lost, he unexpectedly let you call and ask out a woman to watch movie…. oh right, how many times did you call?"
"I just called once." He looked at me, and said: "Because the punishment didn't state that we could date any woman out, but I need to ask you out."
I expressed my puzzlement: "Why me?"
"Because my roommate thought: "That I will never ask you out!"
I still didn't understand: "Why am that hard to being asked out?"
"Because since I unconsciously said something that I shouldn't say, you never talk with me for a year."
Yi! He really has a good memory skills!
I once again remembered something and asked him: "But that night the time I answered the call, you clearly asked for Zhuo Zhuo."
He lowered his head and drank his water, he answered me: "That afternoon, I saw her went home after the exam…."
Yi! Actually for someone like me that IQ level never really developed, he really never need to do those thing.
We were talking and eating. I suddenly remembered my eldest cousin's special thinking about love: if a man has a hundred dollar, yet he is only willing to spend ten dollar for you. Then you shouldn't marry him. But if a man just has ten dollar, and he is willing to give it all for you. Then he is the worthy one.
For proving the worthy of Xiao Cheng for Zhuo Zhuo, I said: "I give you a question to show your personality, to show whether you are a good man or not."
He put down his chopstick and seriously said to you.
"If you have a hundred dollar, how many dollars you are willing to spend to buy something that your girl like?"
He answered: "Then I need to see first what does she like."
"You will buy no matter how expensive it is?"
"I will. If the my money is not enough, I will think of the way."
"We will have a lot of chances to earn money, but for making a woman to be happy, there will be not always a chance."
I was so surprised that I couldn't talk anymore. I noticed his logic always……… so good.
"So what's the result?" He asked: "Am I a good man?"
I seriously told him: "You are a prodigal man."
"It's quite precise." He smiled and took a ladle. He scooped some meats and mushrooms into my bowl: "Eat it, eat a bit more."
When I was moved by his kindness, I heard him said: "……. to give some nutrition for your brain!"
During giving some nutrition for my brain, I silently watched for Xiao Cheng. He is different from the man that I know.
He is caring and before eating, he will put chopsticks on my plate.
He would open the drinks and put it on my side.
He would also wash my glasses first, then poured a full glass of water for me. Then placed it on beside my plate.
He would let me to choose the dishes that I want, then ordered a favorite desserts of woman. He would order meals for four people and wouldn't eat more than me.
He would in time pass a tissue for me, and would in the exact time kept my glasses filled…..
I always have no immunity to boys who will take care of people, so when I looked at how attentive and caring he is toward me, my heart was felt being tangled by something. It seemed to be a like a kind of regret. I regretted that this little boy that compatible to my standard was just only eighteen years old, he is two years and three months younger than me.
Actually for me, two years difference is not really a big difference. If he is twenty eight years old then I will be thirty years old. It just a difference between born earlier and later. But that time I was twenty years old, and he was only eighteen years old, he was just a young boy……
If I date him, then it's not a problem of my taste, but a problem regarding my brain!
In a cool atmosphere, Xiao Cheng suddenly asked me: "Why does everyone call you "Little muddle-headed?"
"Because my memory is not really good, I always forget something. I always couldn't remember numbers."
He said that I am the opposite of him, he always good at memorizing number.
I couldn't help to test him: "Then let me give you another question."
He looked at me: "Say it."
I laughed and said my new phone numbers.
He also smiled and said eleven- digit of my phone number. Then he said eleven-digit of his phone number.
Except 139, I couldn't really memorize it.
After we finished our dinner, felt full, and happy, I got ready to take out my wallet and paid.
He extended his hand to stop me: "Keep your wallet, I will not let a woman give out a money in front of my face."
"It's a normal thing that man is someone that pay, it's just like woman is the one that gives birth."
Xiao Cheng's opinion is always ——— rouse the deaf, enlighten the benighted (Idiom).
Back in my dorm, when I was clutching my phone and trying to remember his phone number, a message tone rang.
I looked at the notification, it was from 139…… I immediately guessed who was it, that's right, just based on my guess.
I opened the message happily and looked at the screen : [ "Supposedly you forget my number so I send you a message. If you are convenient, you can save it on your phone."]
This man, why should he be so understanding toward me? I was really losing my face!
Holding my phone, I raised my head to see Zhu Zhuo, she was filling in the application for the party. Her hair hung down. She was looking so elegant and graceful.
I asked : "Zhuo Zhuo, what do you think of Xiao Cheng?"
Zhuo Zhuo paused her writing, considered, then after a while, she answered me: "He is quite good. Though he is only eighteen years old, but his personality shows that he is more than eighteen. However even if he is mentally mature, he is still a little boy, he is too young…."
I noticed a kind of resentment in Zhuo Zhuo's tone, it's like my feeling. I laying on my bed and looked at the ceiling with disappointment.
I remembered of the eighteen years old boys in my high school, who loved to live fun and happily. They started to date and vowed to be loyal. Most of them will said "that time I was too young" if they failed in their relationship.
Yes! when they were eighteen years old, who could believe that from eighteen to eighty years old, they wouldn't have a change of heart?
Zhuo Zhuo didn't believe it, I also didn't believe it!
After several days when I felt really bored, beautiful-like-angel, Zhuo Zhuo asked me: "Xin Xin, do you want to go and play card? Before I met Cheng Ze by chance, he wanted to ask us to go down and play card… will you go?"
I suddenly felt energetic, I immediately jumped down from my bed.
"Go, go….hey, wait. Let me comb my hair, wash my face, and change my clothes."
I didn't know since when, I started to pay attention to my look in front of him.
Although I never be like Zhuo Zhuo, but I hope in his mind and memory, I will not be too terrible.
It was the first time I went to Xiao Cheng's room and I was surprised
I thought boys' room will be so messy and full of dirty socks. It would be so messy that there will be no place to sit or step.
Instead, the Virgo, Xiao Cheng, has a mysophobia that he always places everything vividly and incisively.
All of his things were placed in order. On his shelves, there was a set of Crayon Sinchan clay doll. The plaid sheets were laid flat on the bed, the quilts were placed neatly on the bed. There was a cute Crayon Sinchan doll that laid on the pillow. It was so cute with a big head. "It's so cute."
That time I was so obsessed with the cartoon of Crayon Sinchan and when I saw that doll, I couldn't help but to hug it and felt it with my arm. The soft head rested on my shoulder and I smelled familiar yet strange scent.
I was holding the cute Crayon Sinchan, I couldn't help but asked curiously to Xiao Cheng: "Do you like Crayon Sinchan?"
His answer was simple, his roommate added: "Cheng Ze was very fat when he was a kid. His head was so round and his way of talking was funny. He was exactly the same as little Crayon Sinchan."
I glanced at his face and looked at Crayon Sinchan in my embrace, to make a comparison….. it was too challenging for my imagination.
That day when we played card, Xiao Cheng and I was in time. When I was full of expecting to win, but at last we were completely defeated.
I asked him: "Don't you feel that your luck is really bad today?"
He looked at me deeply and said, "No."
I was just about to ask again "Then why are you keep on losing?", suddenly I remembered once he said to me —- "Of course I've lost. It's maybe because my luck is bad, or perhaps I was in one group with teammate who is like pig that I can lost…."
I hugged Crayon Sinchan tightly and felt guilty.
Without knowing, it was already eleven o'clock.
I knew that I need to go home, but I was unwilling to part with Crayon Sinchan in my embrace. I was really unwilling to part with him.
I bit my lips and with thick-faced I asked Xiao Cheng: "Your Crayon Sinchan is really cute, lend it for me to play for two days?"
"You like it? Later on I will give you one." He answered.
I thought it was his way to show his unwillingness to lend it for me, so I put it down half-heartedly.
I didn't expect that two nights after that day, he came to our dorm with Crayon Sinchan doll.
I hadn't really focused: "What are you doing by bringing him here? You want to lend me to play for two days?"
I was still lost: "For me? Why do you want to give it to me?"
"I promised you that I will give you, so now I give it to you."
He said it then, he directly passed the Crayon Sinchan to me. He turned his body and left.
"Promised that he will give it and just give me? If you promised to me to give me the real one, you will also give it to me?"
He turned his head to see me, he wanted to say something, but he was like a bit unsure what to say.
I immediately just realized that I made a mistake.
I decided to hit the wall and kill myself.
I hugged my Crayon Sinchan and sat down on the bed side.
I remembered clearly that that time was an autumn night, the leaves were fell down.
People say that late autumn is bleak and ruthless, but I never think…..
Until that day, I carried my furry Crayon Sinchan, I sticked my face on his big head and looked at the window. I just noticed autumn day is a season of depression.
Since little, I've never fond of plush toys. Crayon Sinchan, that was given by Xiao Cheng, was the only one that I like. I put it on the side of pillow and when I've difficulty to fall asleep I will rest my head peacefully on his big head.
For many years, Crayon Sinchan had been on my pillow. Thought it occupied half of my pillow I've never felt it was redundant.
Because every time I see it, I always think of Cheng Ze. Falling in love with Cheng Ze, is not only burning or intense or vigorous. I just kept him in my heart bit by bit and I can't forget that even for a moment…………