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It's the kind of communication they've secretly wished they could have with a woman but could never find.

Creating this open, pressure free kind of communication makes you VERY attractive to a man.

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Chapter 10:

Keeping Him Attracted To You, Or "How to Have a Long Term Relationship"

The Life of a Relationship Once you've figured out how to attract more men, you're bound to find one who's particularly interesting to you.

One that you might actually, um, love.

One that you might want to keep around for a bit.

Hey, you might even meet someone that you want to spend the rest of your life with.

Even though I've talked a lot in this book about meeting and attracting men, I don't feel that it would be complete without at least a few ideas on how to keep a man attracted to you for the long haul.

But first of all, here's my take on why relationships fail: When you first start dating someone you really like, the body releases a combination of chemicals that are quite literally intoxicating. These chemicals cause you to want to be with that person all the time, stay up all night talking to them, and have sex with them three times a day.

But twelve to eighteen months later, the chemicals change. The intoxicating chemicals are replaced by 'stability'

chemicals. The 'stay-up-all-night-can't-be-away-from-her-have-sex-three-times-a-day' feeling goes away and the 'let's-settle-down-and-have-two-kids-and-buy-a-minivan' chemicals take over. Deal with it. (If you want to understand this process better, read The Alchemy of Love and Lust by Theresa Crenshaw.) So now that you know this, how do you keep this whole thing from turning into an episode of "All in the Family?"

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Well, the short answer is, keep up the fun, interesting, and unpredictable behavior. Notice the details. Do thoughtful things.

Here's something that I've learned in life: If you want to have someone in your life just to listen to you, make you feel safe, listen to all your problems, and try to make you happy, then go see a therapist.

It's not gonna happen exactly the way you want in relationships... people are very complex. In fact, if you want to get a lot back in a relationship with a person, especially a man, you're probably going to have to give a lot. The payoff isn't always equal to what you put in so don't let it frustrate you.

Keep your head by keeping your life balanced.

Most people are selfish and say, "I'm not going to give more than I get." But instead of getting a lot, all they get is old and unhappy. I've found that it's much better to give a ton and not care about the fact that I didn't get as much as I gave than to give little or none and get back little or none. Women seem to get this about relationships much more intuitively than men do...

Relationships aren't like investing. If you want a lot, get used to giving more. But it's worth it in the end, because love, attention, humor, and fun aren't like money. If you give them out, you don't have less. You have MORE. Get it?

Now that you've read this book, you probably have that same feeling that I had when I first learned about all of this amazing material. You're probably excited.

Let me know how it goes... And stay in touch.

And if you're not already getting it, make sure and check out my free email newsletter. You can sign up for it free by going here:

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