Ever since that day, every time Xu Jiamu had a gathering, he would squeeze out time just to go over, but the number of meetings he had with Qiao Anhao dwindled. And whenever they met, she would not speak to him.
The reality that she was leaving his life was much more painful than when he realized that he could not love her five years ago.
Emotions flooded into Lu Jinnian's eyes as he continued to look at Qiao Anhao. Pain, heartache, sadness, helplessness... and a rush of emotions that eventually became misery.
Only when she wasn't looking did he dare to expose his true emotions.
Even though he acted like he didn't care, he did. Deep inside, he cared a lot.
He couldn't help taking a deep breath. Pulling himself out of his misery, he moved, lightly kissing her hair. He wished to be able to tell her "I love you", but his throat was choked. He tried again, and still he wasn't able to say it. He stood up slowly and turned to leave the room.
Some love just couldn't be expressed with voice.
Because the moment it was said aloud, it would be lost.
And he had lost enough. As it was, he would use his entire life to maintain their status quo.
Even if the current situation was horrible.
The words of liking someone could easily be said, but love, it was buried deep in one's heart.
The next day, when Madam Chen was about to leave her room to make breakfast, she bumped into Lu Jinnian, who was walking down from upstairs.
She was momentarily stunned, wondering what time had had come back yesterday. After a short pause, she politely greeted him, "Good morning, Mr. Lu."
Lu Jinnian nodded wordlessly before heading out the door. He changed his shoes and just when he was about to leave the house he instructed her, " Don't tell Mrs. Lu I was back."
Without waiting for Madam Chen to respond, he left.
When Madam Chen snapped out of her daze, Lu Jinnian was already in his car preparing to leave.
She stood at the same spot, her mind filled with questions. She shook her head, wondering why would Mr. Lu try to hide his concern for Mrs. Lu?
The next two days, Qiao Anhao stayed in without leaving the house much. They passed peacefully, without Lu Jinnian coming back, though according to the news he was in the city.
Once, when Madam Chen was going to the toilet in the middle of the night, she saw Lu Jinnian's car. It was parked in the front yard and he was sitting inside. After staying for a very long time, he drove off.