As she stepped toward him, Tony looked to Catherine. "Catherine, if you could please help Ms. Claire? She may need some assistance."
Though Claire obviously understood what he wasn't saying, she pressed on. "Clay, what others have you intercepted?"
"Ma'am, nothing that concerns you."
"I don't believe you."
Catherine tried to assist. "Claire, let's get you something to drink. It's very hot outside."
Defiantly, Claire proclaimed, "I'm not leaving."
Tony fought the red that wanted to stream towards his fiancee. Didn't she understand that this wasn't the time for bold and cheeky? "Claire," he warned.
Surprisingly, wearing her swimsuit, cover-up, and flip-flops, Claire walked toward Tony, to his side of the desk, ignored him, and addressed their staff. "Catherine, Eric, and Clay, could you please excuse us for a minute. Mr. Rawlings and I need to speak privately. I would assume he's not done with you, so please stay close. This won't take long."
He'd never heard her take that tone with anyone. It wasn't demeaning as much as it was authoritative. Despite her attire, Claire was asserting herself in the position Tony wanted her to assume-lady of the house. Everyone in the room turned to him for confirmation. The tension was palpable. Finally, through clenched teeth, he agreed. "Do not go far. I'm not done. Clay, make some calls. After Ms. Claire and I have finished, I want answers."
Of course, Tony saw Catherine's glare as they all hurried from the room. He didn't have the time or energy to worry about her wounded ego. The way he saw it, it was her fault for not confiding fully in Claire.
"What's happening?" Claire's question brought Tony back to present.
"How did you hear? You were at the pool."
"How could I not hear? Everyone in a three-mile radius could hear you. Tell me, what's so important to bring you home early from work? The sooner I know, the sooner you can continue your meeting."
"Damn it, Claire! I don't want you worrying." He paced to the window and back. "Besides, who in their right mind would come in here while I'm teetering on the edge of sanity? Did you see how fast they all left?"
Claire smiled as she placed her hands on the lapels of his dark suit. "No one. Just ask my family, I'm definitely not in my right mind, and if I'm correct, the only thing that can get you this worked up is something about me." She turned and picked up the package addressed to Claire Nichols Rawls. "So I don't get to open my own mail anymore?"
"Seriously, some asshole found you here, knows our address, and you want to complain about opening mail?"
She turned and faced him. With her spine straight and chin up, her voice stayed calm. "No, it scares the hell out of me, but anyone can learn this address; it's public record. The stupid press has told anyone who wants to listen that I'm living here." She lifted the box. "What was in it? And how many packages or letters have come that I don't know about?"
"It was a silver baby rattle-engraved."
"Where is it?"
"Clay bagged it. He's having it processed for fingerprints. Hopefully, the asshole touched it."
"Engraved... what did it say?"
Tony seized her shoulders and pulled her close. "Claire, let me handle this. Show me you have faith in me."
Her face tilted upward. "I wouldn't be here if I didn't." She kissed him. "What did it say?"
"Baby Nichols-Rawls."
"That isn't so bad, considering the way it was addressed. Why didn't you want me to know about it?"
He directed her to his large leather chair behind the desk. It was his throne of control-in his office, his estate, his world. Tony wanted Claire to know that he welcomed her sharing that power, but with the responsibility came the burden. One that he feared would require her to sit. Claire obediently bent her knees, and he said, "That wasn't all. Under the name it read R.I.P."
Her eyes misted in shock, and her hand protectively covered her midsection. "Oh my God, Tony..."
Kneeling before her, he tempered his tone. "I told you once before, too much information isn't good for you. Will you please learn to trust me and enjoy the bliss I'm trying so hard to provide?"
"B-but... that has to be considered a threat. Can't you take it to the police?"
"We are, but what will they do that we aren't already doing?"
Embracing her shoulders, her body trembled as tears coated his jacket. When a semblance of calm prevailed, she said, "I'm going to lie down. Will you please come to our room when you're done with the others? Or are you going back to work?"
"No," he reassured. "I'm staying here. I'll be there as soon as we're done."
When the others returned, Tony learned that the package had inadvertently been brought inside with the rest of the mail. The police had been informed and additional cameras and sensors were going up all around the estate. The difficulty was the size of the property. Tony worried about Claire's walks to her lake. He didn't want to take that freedom away from her, but he didn't want her hiking alone.
Tony had a trip planned to Europe in early September. He had meetings that he needed to attend to in person, as well as his semiannual obligation to move and reinvest Nathaniel's money. Repeatedly, he asked Claire to join him, and repeatedly, she said no. Claire explained that she felt safer on the estate and didn't want to be overseas. If there had been any way to avoid the trip, Tony would have done it.
The morning he left, Tony tried one last time to convince her to accompany him. Though she was sleeping in their bed, in the suite that used to be his that they now shared, he kissed her gently and her eyes fluttered as her sleepy voice questioned, "You woke me up before you left?"
"You told me to."
Her eyes opened, revealing a bewildered expression.
"Why are you looking at me that way? You said you wanted me to wake you."
"I know." She sat up, their gaze unbroken. "I'm just not used to you listening to me, or doing what I say."
He pressed closer, feeling the sensation of her breasts against his chest. "Well, we could go back to-"
Claire shook her head as she once again embraced his neck. "No, I like this better."
His devilish grin made his brown eyes shimmer. "Well, last night you didn't seem to mind a few directions, or should I say, suggestions?"
Her cheeks reddened as she buried her face in his shoulder and muffled her confession. "Yeah, well, I like that, too."
Taking her chin in his gentle grasp, Tony searched her eyes. He could get lost in the depths of the green-emerald green, so deep and rich. "I was hoping I could change your mind about joining me on this trip."
Their noses nearly touched as her lids fluttered and expression softened. "When do you need to leave?"
It wasn't the response he wanted; he wanted her to say she'd come to Europe with him. "The plane's ready. Eric's waiting in the car."
Claire's expression beckoned, her fingers found the buttons of his shirt, and her words came between butterfly kisses to his neck, "I don't think" "Eric would mind" "waiting a little longer" "Besides" "you're going to be gone" "for almost two weeks." As Claire's fingers moved toward his belt and her lips touched his newly exposed chest, Tony's travel plans seemed suddenly insignificant. For the next forty minutes they were lost within one another. Tony couldn't help caressing and kissing her midsection and their unborn child as he moved up and down her sensual body. Her soft skin and amazing scent dominated his thoughts. As often happened when they made love, the worries or concerns outside of their bubble momentarily disappeared.
When he finally redressed and started to leave, Claire's aura pulled him back for one last kiss. "I love you and I'll be back as soon as I can. I wish you were coming."
Her eyelids fought an unseen weight. "Travel safely. I love you, too."
As he tucked the covers around her soft body, he asked, "Are you going back to sleep?"
She nodded. "Yes, I think after that strenuous morning workout, I need a nap."
Grinning, he kissed the top of her head and watched as her smile faded, her eyes closed, and she appeared blissfully serene. It was then Tony remembered the security. He didn't want her to think things were different because he wasn't home. Utilizing his CEO tone, he added, "Claire."
Her eyes immediately opened. Although she didn't speak, she obviously recognized his change in tenor. Perched on the edge of the bed, Tony reminded her, "If you leave the estate-"
She stilled his words with the touch of her hand. The large diamond on her fourth finger glistened, as she responded appropriately, "I promise, I'll take Clay."
"This isn't debatable."
"Tony, I'm not debating. I'm trying to sleep."
He kissed her lips. "I'll call when I touch down in London."
She nodded. "Be safe. I think Eric's waiting."
Three days later, Tony received word of an attempted break-in at the estate. Thankfully, Clay had thwarted the attempt. Unfortunately, the perpetrator had not been caught. It seemed obvious that Chester's accomplice was becoming bolder with his threats. More than anything, Tony wanted to get back to Iowa.
To that end, he rescheduled a few of his meetings and contemplated waiting for another time to visit Switzerland. The money could wait. It hadn't been discovered in over twenty-five years. One extra six-month period of accumulation wouldn't make that big of a difference. He had two more days before he could leave, when he received the call from Clay explaining that someone had tried to run him and Claire off the road. Tony didn't give a damn about any more of the meetings-he headed home.
Twice before he took off, Tony tried to reach Claire. The first time, Catherine answered. He was shocked to hear her voice on Claire's private phone, but it made sense when Catherine explained that Claire was shaken by the incident and was sleeping. The second time he tried, his call went straight to voice mail. As soon as his plane landed in Iowa, he tried to reach her again. This time, it continued to ring. Even the voice mail wouldn't activate. Next, Tony tried Catherine. She answered right away.
"Catherine, can you go to Claire? I've been trying to reach her, but she isn't answering."
"I would, Anthony. However, she isn't home."
He exhaled. "All right, maybe she forgot her phone. I'll call Clay."
"He's here. She left yesterday after her nap and we haven't seen her since."
His world imploded. "What do you mean she left yesterday and hasn't come back? How could she leave without Clay?"
"She said she was tired of the constant surveillance and needed a break."
"When? Why haven't you called me or the police?"
Catherine tried to justify her reasoning. "Yesterday evening... I assumed she'd be back. It wasn't until this morning we realized she hadn't returned. You were in the air; I couldn't reach you. I haven't called the police. What was I supposed to say? A twenty-nine-year-old woman drove away, on her own, and now I can't reach her? Once Clay learned she'd disappeared, he followed the GPS, and your car was located outside Des Moines... Anton, I'm so sorry. I truly thought she would return after she got her break. I was doing what you said to do-trust. You know how the hormones are making her emotional. I'm very worried."
"Eric! Hit the damn gas! I need to be home!" Tony's mind scrambled as he spoke to Catherine through the phone. "Des Moines? Jane Allyson is there. I'll contact her."
"Claire left her phone and iPad here. I can tell you, she's missed many calls from people, especially her sister."
"Shit, someone will need to contact Emily." The jet lag was nothing compared to the chaos occurring in his mind. "What if Chester's accomplice has her? We need to get the police involved. Have I received any ransom requests?"
"No, nothing here."
"So a car tries to run Clay off the road, and later that same day, Claire decides to leave. Doesn't anyone else think that this is suspicious?" His question was rhetorical; he'd disconnected their call.
Three days passed. The police came and went. Tony made phone calls and offered rewards. Every nutjob came out of the woodwork, yet no one could find Claire. For endless hours, he stared at the monitors in his office. The large screen was subdivided into many smaller screens. At the top was a live feed from outside his office door. He didn't want any intruders. Below were multiple smaller screens changing constantly with various locations on the estate. The bulk of the screen held two videos. He controlled the speed and sound of each one. On the left, he saw Claire in his garages, rushing to the key cabinet and removing the key to a Mercedes-Benz. In the lower right corner the date read: 01/17/12. On the right was the video of Claire walking casually to the key cabinet that no longer held a lock. He watched as she removed the keys to a BMW and calmly walked toward the car. The date in the lower right corner read: 09/04/13. Repeatedly, he paused and scrutinized the scenes. With all his might, he tried to read Claire's facial expressions.
In 2012, he saw fear as Claire looked around nervously. On the video recorded only days earlier, Tony wondered what he saw. No, he knew what he saw: she was wearing her mask of steely determination. What he didn't know was what emotion was hidden beneath it.
When the police saw the 2013 video, they theorized that Claire left of her own free will. If that were true, wouldn't she have taken more belongings? Wouldn't she have taken more money? She had access. She had credit cards and an ATM card, yet they were all found in an Illinois hotel.
Being nearly 2:00 AM, Tony was alone in his office. The various screens displaying the estate were devoid of people. Everyone was fast asleep. Even the crickets outside his open windows knew to leave him in silence, yet with no one to hear, he spoke the question he'd been wrestling with for days, "Why, Claire? Why?" In one gulp, he downed the amber liquid from the crystal tumbler. Though the rich Glen Garioch whiskey went down smoothly, it didn't ease the ache in his head or the pain in his chest.
Maintaining his facade for the last few days had successfully drained his strength. Tony needed sleep, but how could he sleep in their bed? He couldn't even stand to enter their room or see the unfinished nursery. It was the not knowing that hurt the most. If he knew she were safe... If he knew she did this of her own free will... but he didn't know. Last time-in 2012-he knew, and without a doubt, the pain he'd put her through back then added to his current torment.
How could Claire evaporate into thin air?
The BMW she'd driven was thoroughly searched by Iowa's top CSI. Only her fingerprints, Clay's, Eric's, and Tony's were discovered... no unknown clues.
For the first time in his life, Tony had dared to believe in happily-ever-after. It was a risk. At a young age he'd learned that it was unattainable; therefore, he'd never even tried... until Claire. Somehow, for a few short months, his everything was at his fingertips. The wealth, homes, and appearance of stability and sanity all meant nothing when he saw the pictures of Claire with Harry. Tony couldn't be at that damn gala and know she was there with him. Hell, Tony hadn't even known about their baby. He just knew, for the first time in his life, Anthony Rawlings was willing to risk public scrutiny to have what he wanted most. What mattered to him above anything else-the contents of his envelope. The problem was making her realize it.
Tony reached into his drawer and removed the envelope. It no longer brought the smile to his lips as it once had. Now, it was a blatant reminder of all he'd lost. Tossing it back into the drawer, he turned off the screens, and lay upon the soft leather sofa. His mind went back to 2011. On this very couch... on this luxurious carpet... on his desk. He smiled. There was hardly a place where they hadn't been together. Damn, they'd been great. Despite the happy memories, the knife in his heart twisted. The things he'd done to her, the emptiness he'd given her-the regret was almost paralyzing.
Then somehow in this totally screwed-up world, when all was said and done, she'd taken him back. The happiness faded as doubts infiltrated his mind. If Claire left of her own free will, had any of the past four months been real? She'd accepted his ring. He told her every day how much he loved her. Had it all been a charade? Did she have her own agenda of revenge for his past sins? Tony didn't want to think it was possible.
The pounding in his head brought moisture to his eyes. His words were barely audible. That was all right; they weren't intended for anyone except the woman who wasn't there. "I'm so sorry... for everything. Why? Why did you leave me?" As the tears coated his cheeks, he told himself, Anthony Rawlings doesn't cry. He doesn't apologize, and he doesn't cry...
Perhaps there were stars falling, volcanoes erupting, or epic winds blowing. Truthfully, at that moment, the entire world could've been lost and neither one would have known.
-Aleatha Romig, CONVICTED The small plane circled the island, losing altitude with each pass, until it finally came to a rest upon the calm, crystal-blue waters of the lagoon. From the air, Tony had seen the main home sprawled on a hill above the beach, as well as multiple other dwellings partially hidden by vegetation. From the lagoon, Tony looked up and saw a large patio. All he could make out were people whom he didn't recognize. The propellers slowed as the engine died. Following Roach's lead, Tony removed the sound-muffling ear phones.
"Are you ready?" Roach asked.
Tony had better be ready; he'd eluded the FBI and traveled halfway around the world for this. He prayed it was worth it, that Claire would, at the very least, hear him out. After all, the last time they'd spoken, he'd allowed his own disbelief and hurt to distort the meaning of her words. She'd tried to clarify, and he'd stayed true to form and been an ass. Tony hadn't even considered what she'd been through during the past month, and when she tried to explain, he hung up on her. Steeling his shoulders, Tony replied, "I am. Do you think she's up at the house?"
"I'm sure she heard the plane," Roach replied. "I'd expect her to come down to greet us."
"Us?"
"Well, there're two of us. She doesn't know you're coming, but no one except me knows her location. I'd assume she's expecting me."
Tony nodded, as Phil stepped from the now beached plane. The hot, humid breeze filled the cabin, while white sand and palm trees brought back memories of his and Claire's honeymoon. He wondered if Claire ever thought about that-if she thought about him. Taking a deep breath of salty air, Tony exited the plane. His shoes sunk with each step as sand covered the leather loafers. Looking up toward the greenery and flowers, Tony's world stopped.
Standing beneath a canopy of vegetation was his dream, his life, and the contents of his envelope. She was a vision in pink. Claire's neck straightened as her shoulders went back. Her emerald gaze met his. It was their connection, a means of communication that no one else could ever have understood. Without a word, he called to her, told her he loved her, and begged for forgiveness. Was Roach speaking? Was there even anyone on the earth besides the two of them? Lost in her penetrating stare, Tony didn't know or care.
He continued forward until her beautiful body was against his. Their baby had grown, making its presence known as he pulled Claire toward him. Tony had planned to explain, to apologize, to discuss, yet words didn't form as he captured her neck and brought his mouth to hers, claiming what was his. She didn't protest, as a matter of fact, she didn't say a word. No, the sounds coming from Claire were the moans of pleasure and desire that he'd feared were forever gone. They were the sounds he heard in his dreams-but this wasn't a dream, it was real. Peering once again into her shimmering eyes, he intertwined his fingers in her hair, and repositioned her head. Seconds before he returned his lips to hers, she whispered, "I'm sorry."
Their tongues united and her radiating warmth pulled him closer. Breaking their seal, for only a second, Tony replied, "No, I'm sorry."
The relief of her embrace and the parting of her lips, allowed him full access to what was his, overwhelming him, bursting their bubble and exposing them to the world. The ocean breeze returned, stinging his eyes, causing moisture to pool. He blinked it away before Claire could see, because... Anthony Rawlings didn't apologize and he didn't cry... that's the truth.
THE END.
Until Behind His Eyes Convicted is revealed.
Thank you for reading The Consequences Series reading companion Behind His Eyes Truth and learning Tony's side of the story. Please join me for Behind His Eyes Convicted. The final reading companion in the Consequences series is subtitled The Missing Years and begins on that fateful day in the Rawlings mansion when a deafening shot reverberated into life-changing consequences.