Ellen
Your fingers, voice, eyes, I love with my entire body.
I don’t need my eyes anymore.
I can just run with your legs.
So please, give it to me.
Sleeping beasts woke up with a start, looking around cautiously in all directions. Because they didn’t know where the air of unrest was coming from.
The wise beast child knew.
The child saw the red roofed house - the house where the witch lived.
A great, unprecedented change.
In fact, for that reason, there was no grief. Even if the master died, they beasts would simply go on living in the forest.
Only for a moment. Only for a moment did the white light take vision from the beasts, then promptly was gone. And with it also left the black fog of unease.
The birds and beasts were relieved, and began to move.
A calm wind blew through the forest. It was somehow different from that which had always blown; it seemed to carry a sorrowful tone.
The beast child felt it with its eyes and ears, its entire body. But it was meaningless, as it had no way to express the emotion.
The child followed its mother, vanishing into the trees.
Had the beast child the means to express itself, perhaps this is what it would have said.
As the light gradually faded…
It was very calming.
There was no longer a noisy ringing deep in my ears.
It was completely silent.
I could see.
I was still sitting in the chair, fallen over the bed.
There were no bandages on my hands. I could delicately move even my fingertips. My legs were both there. Touching the ground. There were not bandages around my feet, but leather shoes.
The spell had worked.
I could tell my cheeks were heating up. I held them with both hands and yelled.
I looked at the girl lying down.
Bandages were wrapped around both eyes. The pale lips opened slightly, taking shallow breaths. The long purple hair lay strewn across the bed. One of the little hands reached toward me.
I could still feel the sensation in my hand.
Reacting to my voice, Viola’s eyebrows moved slightly. Finally regaining consciousness, a moan came out of her mouth.
“Viola!”
Suddenly, she held her forehead like she’d been punched, and began to scream.
“Aaaaah! - G-GAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!”
I stood up from the chair and spun around, making the skirt flutter.
“Oh, sorry. You can’t see, can you?”
She couldn’t properly respond to the pain of the body. She pushed the hand away so weakly, it was like being brushed by an angel’s feather.
“…Ah!”
“…Viola, does it hurt? Ohh, I bet it does. Sorry, just wait, okay? I’ll get you some medicine to stop the pain.”
Looking at her, I went to the cupboard. I opened the drawer and quickly found the medicine. But I purposefully took my time rummaging around.
Viola gripped the sheets, desperately trying to endure the pain. Ahh, it was so comical, so darling.
“E-Ellen, m… m-my legs…”
“Ah…”
What happened to my legs? Boy. Did she only just notice they were gone?
I filled the cup with water from a pitcher.
Then I dropped a grain of the candy-like medicine in the cup. It dissolved in an instant.
But this medicine wouldn’t stop the pain.
“Here you go, Viola. You’ll feel better if you drink this.”
Viola thanked me, and drank the medicine all at once.
The moment the contents spilled out onto the floor -
“Ahahahahahahhahhah!! You drank it! You drank it! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!”
Viola stuck our her tongue and held her throat with both hands. She trembled and panted in a hoarse voice.
After laughing a while, I wiped away the blood and spoke.
Why?, she seemed to ask.
“…Don’t you see? I don’t want to hear my own screams.”
Viola still desperately held her throat.
Like a wild animal’s.
I looked at Viola somewhat coldly.
“… … … …”
I laughed like I’d just thought of a funny joke.
She faintly trembled. Soon, she started to struggle. I figure that was all she could do to distract from the pain.
Her body, only an upper half, tumbled out of bed onto the floor.
This clean skirt being stained with blood would be no good, no good at all.
A miserable whistling breath repeated. She didn’t even seem to know where I was.
Viola frantically tried to push some words out of her ruined throat.
“Gi… i… … ba…”
Perhaps that was what she was saying.
I felt like I’d long been awaiting those words.
“…Give it back? Weren’t you going to lend it to me for a day?”
I put my hands on my hips.
Tilting my head only slightly, furrowing my brows, I looked down at her. Or perhaps looking down on her was more accurate.
“No way. I promised it’d just be a day. …Could it be you were lying?”
But I made sure to ask.
“Ha.”
And to make my sorrow at being betrayed clear, I slowly and carefully spoke in a whisper.
Viola’s body stiffened. The air stilled, and I could tell the sense of crisis that her trembling body said she felt.
But now?
“If it was that important to you, you shouldn’t have given it up so easily!! AHAHA HAHA HA HA HA, HAHA, HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA, HEEEEEHEE, HEE HEE HEE HEE, AHAHAAA, HEEHEE, HAHAHAHAAA!”
Viola raised a scream she couldn’t voice and reached a hand for me.
Her hand forcefully bumped into the chair, knocking it over.
The black, gouged eyes opened wide.
Those eyes. Their total blackness. They were a symbol of despair.
If a person who knew nothing saw those eyes, they might be unable to move from terror. They might imagine their soul being sucked into those open black voids.
They were just eyesockets.
The rose vases I passed were dropping red petals.
There was no sound in the quiet house but my pleasant footsteps and lively breaths.
Run on my own legs.
I passed through the kitchen, the dining room, all the familiar rooms, and reached the entryway in no time.
With a slight pause, I pushed it wide open.
…In a moment.
The smell of grass pierced into the back of my nose.
My children, which I had before only gazed at from inside.
As if drawn by the powerful colors, I took one step outside.
The moment my foot stepped onto the ground, I remembered.
There was no impact like being punched in the head. No heat like my skin was melting. The body of this human named Viola was separate from the house, existed apart from it.
Tears which accompanied no pain fell down my cheeks.
Come to think of it, when I came to the house, I heard applause as well.
My eyelids closed, and I saw memories that remained with this body.
I knew everything. How I had love in my future, in both directions. What lied ahead for this body. I knew it in an instant. And it was mine. …This beloved body.
I held my shoulders as if hugging myself. I wanted to kiss myself. I did so on my left shoulder.
I squinted at the strong sunlight.
I laughed, and ran as if chasing the birds in flight.
Running, running. I left the garden surrounded by roses.
…I could see my diary.
My diary was upon on the desk. The feather pen smoothly wrote words on its own.
My final words.
I didn’t X her.
Because she saved me
she saved me.
Because she wouldn’t betray me.
Poor her.
Saved me from my sickness.
I’m sorry, okay? Thank you, Viola.
I’ll live your share.
So please, forgive me.