Volume 5
284 I'll Leave With You
Piercer regarded me with a profound gaze. "Gaoqin Jiuye really loved you. He sacrificed so much for a woman he had merely seen in his dreams."
Si Luo spoke suddenly. "Gaoqin was telling me all about you during that time. I used to really regret telling him how to go over to your world, but now that I look at it, I might have been wrong at the time. I should've respected his choices if that was the life he really wanted."
Jiao S turned to Si Luo and asked, "How about me? Have you ever dreamt of me?"
Si Luo shook his head as he answered without looking at her. "Didn't you come over to this world before you actually arrived here? That's from your determination and I didn't do anything to cause that. I don't know who exactly was the soul splitter who eventually brought you over."
Reminded of Nie Zun as I watched the two of them, I asked Piercer in haste, "How about Nie Zun? You mentioned that I was the one who brought Nie Zun over. What actually happened?"
Piercer glanced at Nie Zun. That indifferent look of his hid all emotions.
"Nie Zun is different from everyone else, and he doesn't really have a connection to this world. There's no soul splitter who had dreamt of him either. I don't think I can answer this, so you'd probably have to ask him how he ended up here in the Split Zone. It would have something to do with your second personality as well."
An ominous feeling overcame me.
"Ah Shen, you're different from the rest of them who had been captured because you already had two personalities to begin with. You already had a personality that was independent, and on a certain level, that independence would have been equivalent to that of a soul splitter in the Split Zone. But that independence was way too strong, and not only did that form a part of you, it became a different person altogether.
"You wouldn't have been able to end up in the Split Zone originally, and I don't know how much Gaoqin Jiuye had to do to actually bring you over. What I know is that Nie Zun happened to be with you when you arrived, and you could say that it was your second personality who brought Nie Zun over. However, I don't actually know what happened between your second personality and Nie Zun."
"I think I know what happened." I heard Gaoqin Jiuye's voice interrupt while I was focusing on Piercer's explanation.
My heart skipped a beat. I wondered if it was guilt or from some other emotion. Subconsciously, I was wringing the fabric of my dress as I saw him walk casually towards us.
Gaoqin Jiuye looked at Si Luo. "Your condition is getting from bad to worse. I can feel it."
Si Luo smiled beautifully. "I'm fine."
Gaoqin Jiuye then stopped some distance away from me. He looked at me calmly as he said, "Let me tell you what happened."
For some reason, his tone of voice sounded foreign and unfamiliar to me.
"Do you still remember that ring? Things might have turned out differently if you hadn't taken it off. I always thought that you only took it off if triggered under certain circumstances, and I was trying my best to save you by going into your world. I don't know what happened in your world, but to help me, Du Yue forced herself to dream of you. She saw what happened, and it was only recently that she told me about it."
I looked towards an unsmiling Du Yue. Instead of her smug expression, she was pursing her lips.
Gaoqin Jiuye continued. "You were being controlled by your second personality at the time, and you gave that ring to Nie Zun."
A scene flashed past my mind right when he said that.
She was in a red dress, and her smile was dazzling even though her hands were covered in blood.
She looked at the male figure dressed in black opposite her.
Lifting a blood-stained hand, she removed that unique-looking ring from her slender finger. The blood stained the ring as she did so.
She then grabbed the hand of the male figure opposite her.
She had this gentle but cruel smile on her. Looking at his left hand, she slowly pried his palm open. His hand looked long and slender, and his palms looked empty without any palm prints.
She looked up, meeting his eyes as she said, "She's Li Shen. If you ever have the chance to see her again, could you do me a favor and stay by her side?"
He answered after a short silence. "Why should I do that?"
She then smiled. "Because I know that you're just like her. I can smell the 'solitude' on the both of you…"
She then put the ring on his left pinky.
That blood-stained ring fit his pinky perfectly, as if everything was already fated to be.
Caressing his face, she said, "Stay with her… No matter what kind of devil she might turn into…"
Police appeared behind her before she could complete her sentence.
"Arrest her. She's the one who stabbed the senior."
Letting go of his hand with a dazzling smile, she retreated a couple of steps before collapsing backwards.
The scene stopped playing as if it had been suddenly cut off. I covered my mouth in shock as I looked at Nie Zun. I saw a glint in his eyes before they slowly turned dark again.
Emotions overwhelmed me. I felt helpless and shocked at this turn of events.
That lady in the scene was definitely me, and that male figure dressed in black was clearly Nie Zun.
When did I meet him like this? Though I recalled the scene, it was as if I was looking at somebody else's story. That wasn't me.
No, this must be something she planted in my mind, something that she added. I'm not her. I'll never be her. She was the one who betrayed Gaoqin Jiuye. She was also the one who gave Nie Zun the ring.
"It's not me… That's not me… It was her who gave the ring to Nie Zun…" I mumbled as tears welled up in my eyes.
Pain flashed past Gaoqin Jiuye's eyes. "It was her who gave the ring to Nie Zun and it wasn't you? You don't wish to acknowledge her presence, but you've fallen in love with Nie Zun instead?"
"I…" I looked up at Nie Zun, then at Gaoqin Jiuye.
What should I do? I planned to be together with Gaoqin Jiuye once I saw him again to repay him for whatever he did, but why was it so difficult to say that I didn't love Nie Zun when I was right in front of him?
Or was it difficult to say this in front of Nie Zun now…?
Nie Zun kept his eyes on me, as if he was waiting for my answer.
I met his eyes and shook my head subconsciously. No, I shouldn't back down now. I've let Gaoqin Jiuye down and I should go back to him now. But why did I find this so difficult…?
Nie Zun spoke suddenly. "Didn't you say that you wanted to return to him when you realized it was him you were in love with when you found out about all that he did for you?"
My heart sank immediately. Why did you have to say that? Have you decided to push me away for good? You're not even the least bit upset about this…?
I wanted to shake my head, but I couldn't even speak nor do anything as I was overwhelmed with emotion.
Seeing Gaoqin Jiuye stare at me, my lips moved but nothing came out of my mouth.
So I was the one who… No, she was the one who gave the ring to Nie Zun…
Why did she have to give it to Nie Zun… Why was it so…?
Why did I fall in love with Nie Zun?
Everything seemed to be in a mess. My life and whatever I believed in seemed to be wrecked every time I recalled something from the past.
The question which Piercer asked me was something that I couldn't even answer myself. Why did I fall in love with Nie Zun?
Am I really me…? Or was she me?
Gaoqin Jiuye stepped closer to me, reaching out a hand at the same time. "Li Shen, I could've let everything go and do what I've always been doing, which is to protect you. But I guess I'm really the bad guy now, because I'm actually jealous of Nie Zun. I actually really hate it that you had a change of heart. I don't want to wait any longer. I want you to leave with me."
I snapped my head up to look at him.
Gaoqin Jiuye's hand was right in front of me.
Emotions seemed to have gotten the better of Du Yue as she called out, "Gaoqin Jiuye!"
She called out loudly, but that was all she could say. Looking at her, I realized that there was also pain in her eyes.
My gaze then landed on Ta Lai. Du Yue, do you love Gaoqin Jiuye, or do you love Ta Lai?
I wondered if it was my silence or Du Yue's shout that caused Gaoqin Jiuye to slowly retract his hand.
I glanced at Nie Zun again. His eyes looked like the surface of a very deep lake.
My heart then began its descent into a bottomless abyss.
Before Gaoqin Jiuye could take his hand back fully, I grabbed it and said, "Okay, I'll leave with you."