Young Master Gu nodded, his voice filled with great forbearance and stoicism as he replied: “That day was very difficult, very special. Want to try.”
“That day when you held the baby, did you have some a special feeling?” Feng Zhiwei wondered, recognizing the baby they had saved at the docks. They had left the infant at one of the charity halls, and she had not expected Gu Nanyi to remember that incident, much less go out and find the baby.
“There are bottlenecks while practicing Kung Fu, and I overcame those by confronting my difficulties.” Young Master Gu replied, fluent in all matters Kung Fu. “So I think this will be the same.”
Feng Zhiwei stared silently. Gu Nanyi did not realize that he blamed himself for her close brush with death, and his self-blame had led to this desire to become “normal” like everyone else, but Feng Zhiwei had really not expected that desire to lead him to bring back a baby.
For someone who needed so many space and distance, who relied upon calm and tranquility in his life, this decision must have been very difficult and painful.
But he persevered through the pain because he never wanted to risk obliviously losing her again.
Perhaps it was this stubbornness in his blood that made him the unusual man that he was.
Feng Zhiwei bit her lips, her heart tightening. It was good that Gu Nanyi had willingly approached people, and she had always been hoping and working towards this, but now that it had actually happened, a sudden fear and anxiety seized her. She could vaguely imagine the twisted, cold turns of fate, grinning hideously as it watched the wonder and purity in the world.
Was taking this pure young man out of the peace of his world and making him face the trials and complications of reality really such a good thing?
When he left his cage, he might be able to see the beauty and color of the world, but he would also certainly see the darkness and blood of mankind.
She felt as if her heart had been plunged into ice and she grew unsure.
“Brother Gu…” She began as she reached for the baby, his discomfort eminently clear from the stiffness of his arms. “Some things cannot be forced, and taking care of a baby is difficult for everyone, much less you. How about we try a different method…”
“No.” Gu Nanyi replied, floating aside and keeping the baby out of her reach. “I feel something.”
The two pen monkeys squeaked and played on his shoulders, clutching Gu Nanyi’s hair and swinging all over the place. They had no idea that if this were the old Gu Nanyi, they would already have been turned into little meat pies.
Feng Zhiwei could not talk him down, and just as she was sighing helplessly, Young Master Gu approached her bed. She hurriedly rushed over and pushed the blanket aside before whirling to face Young Master Gu, a stiff smile on her face.
How could Young Master Gu undersand the guilt behind this smile? He was clueless as he gently lay the baby down on the bed.
Immediately, a terrible, rancid smell filled both their noses.
Young Master Gu looked at Feng Zhiwei.
Feng Zhiwei looked at Young Master Gu.
After a moment, Feng Zhiwei quirked her lips and said: “Young Master, you brought him, you must take responsibility.”
Young Master Gu did not argue, decisively ripping off the diaper. Feng Zhiwei could only close her eyes and turn away, lamenting her ruined bed.
But she had to push through the pain; how could Feng Zhiwei leave Young Master GU alone with this infant? As Gu Nanyi ripped the diaper away, Feng Zhiwei exclaimed quietly.
The baby’s longevity-peach haircut had led her to assume that the baby was a he, but it turns out it was a she all along.
Young Master Gu turned questioningly towards Feng Zhiwei, and for a moment Feng Zhiwei was not sure what to say. After some consideration, she explained: “The child is a girl, so it isn’t too suitable. I’ll find a boy for you to raise.”
Young Master Gu stared without understanding. If it was a girl, then it was a girl? He was taking care of a child, why would gender make this unsuitable.
Gu Nanyi’s confusion made Feng Zhiwei flush quietly in embarrassment.
She decisively shut her mouth, dutifully ripping her bedsheet to fashion a makeshift diaper for the infant before sending her people to fetch Hua Qiong. Feng Zhiwei trusted Hua Qiong’s crisis resolution, and she had recently discovered that in some areas, Hua Qiong was even more vicious than she.
A few days ago, Concubine Yan had been creating a scene, crying and yelling and threatening suicide. Feng Zhiwei was about to banish the girl when Hua Qiong stayed her hand, decisively sending the misfortunate young lady off to the nunnery to “pray for earthly sufferers.” As the Young Lady of the Yan Family, she should also pray for the Yan Family’s good fortune for the next eighty years — Concubine Yan would have no hope of leaving the nunnery in this lifetime.
An amused Hua Qiong soon swept in, patiently listening to Feng Zhiwei’s explanation before calmly replying: “This is easy. I will find a trustworthy wet-nurse for the master and arrange a small room for her in the West Yard.”
Feng Zhiwei half expected Young Master Gu to immediately interject, but he voiced no disapproval. It looked like he was truly determined to face his plight without trepidation or retreat.
They would never be able to find a wet-nurse so late in the night so Hua Qiong stayed to watch over the baby for them. As she bathed the child, Young Master Gu sat quietly beside her observing; as she fed the baby some rice soup, Young Master Gu drank half of it and expressed his great dissatisfaction with the bland tasteless slop, baffled as the baby happily slurped it down. Truly, babies were wondrously strange.
The pen monkeys played until they tired, falling into deep sleep right on his shoulders. Very carefully, Gu Nanyi gently plucked the two creatures off of his shoulder; when he noticed Hua Qiong’s confused expression, Gu Nanyi calmly explained: “I’m afraid I might accidentally squeeze them to death.”
Hua Qiong laughed, but she could not keep her amusement for long. After finally putting the baby to sleep, she took a walk around the garden.
As she strolled, she bumped into Feng Zhiwei. They caught sight of each other across a flower bed and both smiled, walking towards a white stone table to sit for a while.
“Have you made up your mind?”
“Yes.” Hua Qiong replied, toying with her hair. “I know you are leaving for Shang Ye soon, and if I’ve guessed correctly, you’ll be bringing the Maritime Surveillance Camp to suppress the pirates. The Chang Family will flee to the sea sober or later, so you are planning on getting His Highness by the sea and returning to Dijing after?
“Yes.” Feng Zhiwei smiled in answer. “The Department of General Maritime Affairs has been successfully established and the wealthy families are under control. The local officials are in my hand, and Zhou Xizhong owes me his life. Things are secure here and I have finished my duties as Imperial Envoy. His Highness will surely be victorious, and lofty prince cannot be far from Dijing for long. Once the war has stabilized, he will entrust the command to the Minnan General and we will return to Dijing.”