T/N: Sorry guys I had laptop issues so I'll post last week's update as well as this week's early to make up for it!
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Zhao Jin Yu immediately ran in front of her grandmother, who could have imagined grandmother would fall so violently before her eyes, blood rushed out from the pit of her stomach, it immediately dyed her clothes blood red, the stab caused a patch of scarlet red.
“Ah!” Zhao Jin Yu let out a painful roar, she only felt her brain flutter, she only heard a swoosh in her head, seeing black she fainted.
The secret guard finally reacted, pushing Zhao Jin Yu behind him before that Tiangui sect crowd could grab her, with two movements up and down of his blade he dealt with the two people who rushed forward.
An Wen Yao heard the sign of activity over here, knowing it wasn’t suitable to stay here long, he feinted a move, flipping backward, after he pulled Zhao Jin Yu from the secret guard he jumped behind onto a horseback, pressing his legs on either side on the horses stomach it galloped away.
Xu Zhi was just getting a kick out of the fight, and did not think An Wen Yao would flee so quickly like this, he angrily said, “You coward! You want to run away? With the An surname, if you don’t die today I will!” He pulled a horse over from the side, nimbly jumping on, he pursued An Wen Yao.
***
When someone was about to die they would think all parts of their body would become fuzzy, the madam Mao Shi at the start could feel the pain of the hairpin entering her stomach, now as time passed…, everything appeared rather hazy, like she was in a dream.
Everything that had happened before gradually bubbled up in her mind, when she was a young lady at home she was naïve and happy, when she first became a wife the love the eldest old master Zhao Xing Kun showed her, falling apart when she saw her only son’s body.
What did she think of her life? Actually it could be said as very joyful…, she lived her life without restraint.
If there was something she really regretted, that would be when she had opposed her only son Zhao Ying Guan’s marriage.
Yesterday Zhao Jin Yu was still talking back to her, that it was her who did not allow her only son to marry, that pressed him to die tragically outside.
Originally she had thought it was untrue, she had plenty of reasons, what sort of family was their Zhao family? They had produced a divine calligrapher before, one of the very best offspring of a famous family in great Zhao, as her son, the son of the head of the Zhao family, he needed to bear some responsibility, such honour, how could he go marry a woman of the Jianghu?
What’s more she felt her son could find someone better, an influential family on the same footing, a young lady talented and good-looking.
Seeing her son resist in such a way, she ultimately reluctantly agreed for that woman of the Jianghu as a concubine, a man with a concubine before he gets married, this was already an extremely bad thing, but she had agreed…, the madam felt she had conceded a lot. Who would have imagined that woman would not agree!
The madam still remembers her mood at that moment, she simply was burning with anger, a kind of feeling of being ruthlessly insulted.
She used her unyielding manner, so much so that she compelled her filial son to give up on that woman…, and he married the daughter-in-law she chose.
Of course the madam knew her son was unwilling, but she felt time could cure a person’s heartache, passing with time, when her son took the position as the head of the family, he would slowly discover, choosing a suitable wife is a very wise decision, and it was more meaningful for him to assume his responsibilities.
At that time he would naturally be grateful for her actions.
The madam couldn’t help smile satirically when she thought up to here.
What for his own good? Zhao Jin Yu was right! She simply did not know what was best for him! She was no better than her own parents, at that time her father had originally not liked her marrying Zhao
Xing Kun, thinking it was not a suitable marriage, thinking about it wasn’t marriage dictated by the parents? Yet because she wanted to…, not only did her parents not thwart it, but tried hard to lay out the path for her, to allow her to cross over comfortably, apart from the large dowry which accompanied her, they even made Zhao Xing Kun swear to only have her in his lifetime.
Suddenly tears fell like rain when the madam thought of this, she was persistent with her views all her life, arrogantly selfish, it may be said her parents doted on her, the eldest old master Zhao Xing Kun took good care of her.
She did not think at all, what her son needed? And what Zhao Jin Yu needed as well?
What Zhao Jin Yu said was right, in her eyes, family honour, her opinions was much more important than the children’s way of thinking.
Not only did she destroy her son, she also almost destroyed Zhao Jin Yu, she clearly knew she didn’t like the third young master of the Bai family, but in a fit of anger, to make the eldest old master know she could handle this entire matter well…, actually when she thought about it, what exactly was she doing?
Her preference was always the most important.
Fortunately, she had destroyed her son, but at least she had not destroyed her granddaughter, when she escapes and finds the eldest old master Zhao Xing Kun…, truly as a man, Zhao Xing Kun actually did better than her, and had once been moved…, wanting to beseech her for their son to marry that woman, she had opposed at all costs.
If at that time she had agreed…, maybe, even if her son would be pointed and laughed at all his life, at least he would still be alive, and she would have been surrounded by grandchildren at an earlier time, not facing death’s door by herself.
The madam had her eyes half opened, a patch of red staining her body, nanny Li uncontrollably sobbed, Zhao Rui Zhi’s clothes were torn, blood staining her face, vacantly and helplessly she walked over, when she saw the madam lying on the ground on the brink of death, her sight suddenly cleared.
“Hahaha, grandmother? Are you dying?” Zhao Rui Zhi laughed deranged.
Nanny Li cried saying, “You cruel and unscrupulous lowlife, the madam nurtured you with the
utmost care for so many years, you however kick your benefactor in the teeth! Get lost!”
“She nurtured me?” Zhao Rui Zhi’s eyes were filled with coldness, “She raised me, but like a puppy or kitten by her side, if I was obedient I would be able to eat.”
Nanny Li hatefully said, “Look at you, what rubbish are you saying? Isn’t it right to be filial and obedient? Why do you make it sound like you were wronged so much! Even the eldest old master was respectful to his parents before?”
Zhao Rui Zhi said, “It’s not the same, I’m totally different from them, for example Zhao Jin YU, even if she wasn’t obedient, even if grandmother reprimands her, her heart however will still think of her, she will always be the eldest young lady of the Zhao family, yet I…, so long as I’m disobedient, then
I will have to leave the Zhao family! That is the difference!”
Nanny Li was ashen with anger, she said, “You invert right and wrong! Spouting nonsense! Your grandmother is almost dead, you still won’t forgive her! What exactly is in your heart?”
Zhao Rui Zhi glanced at the madam, seeing her open her eyes trembling slightly, completely lacking in focus her eyes moved about, finally stopping on her, she suddenly felt an unspeakable sorrow, tears abruptly flowed down.
The madam opened her mouth, however not a word came out, finally stretching out her hand she beckoned Zhao Rui Zhi.
Zhao Rui Zhi lifelessly staggered over in a moment.
“Girl?” The madam said coarsely.
“Grandmother…”
“Good child, what you said was right.” The madam seemed to want to raise her hand to wipe Zhao Rui Zhi’s tears, but she struggled for a while truly without strength, she helplessly smiled,
“Grandmother has wronged you, it’s true grandmother raised you indeed for selfish motives, I only used you to substitute Qing Luan, I have never thought you are also a living person, with your own way of thinking.”
It was like Zhao Rui Zhi was struck by lightning by chance, with a wail she opened her mouth, “Grandmother, you’re apologising to me?”
“Yes, even though what you did was wrong, greedy of life, afraid of death, coldly selfish, but again what good did I do? If I had truly brought you up treating you as my own granddaughter, teaching you hand in hand how to behave with integrity, and not blindly tell you to restrain your inherent character, be obedient, curry favour by showing obedience, perhaps…, you won’t be as you are now, it’s my fault.” The madam huskily said.
“Grandmother!” Zhao Rui Zhi’s cheeks streamed with tears.
“Girl, can you forgive grandmother?” The madam used all her strength, in the end she crowed.
Zhao Rui Zhi watched the madam’s face gradually turn green, a dying flash of energy, an unreasonable bitterness rose in her heart, she said, “I won’t forgive you! You destroyed me!”
“Girl…”
Nanny Li hearing this almost fainted, yelling, “You ungrateful wretch! Are you human? Do you have a heart?”
Zhao Rui Zhi however seemed to not have heard nanny Li’s words, she gripped the madam’s hand with all her strength, “That’s why, you cannot die! You still haven’t received my forgiveness, you have not seen older sister marry, and have not separated from the eldest old master…, make him regret his conducts and deeds, and have not made up to me…, how can you die?”
“Good child, you hate to part with grandmother right?” The madam smiled with clear understanding, her appearance smoothed out, appearing to be completely happy, “Grandmother is truly glad, grandmother really does love you in her heart…, nanny Li, if you can live…”
“Madam, you won’t die!”
The madam smiled, but the brilliance in her eyes were gradually diminishing, like her soul was leaving her body, she said, “Take this Rui Zhi girl back, say I let her down, make the eldest old master take care of her…”
“Grandmother!”
“Madam!”
With the cries of the two people, the madam finally closed her eyes, before she lost consciousness, all of a sudden she thought, facing death she had come round to matter she would have never come round to in her lifetime…, at least she could be considered dying with satisfaction right?
Guan Er, mother is coming! You won’t avoid me right? Mother won’t ever force you again.
Zhao Rui Zhi saw the madam close her eyes, her mind was shocked, all the hate, all the blame, all the jealous seemed to have already disappeared like smoke…, only a heartful of suffering remained, she still remember the first time she saw grandmother, at that time she was young, she only felt this house was big, these people were so luxurious it made people look up to them in hope, and sitting in the middle of them was a Bodhisattva like imposing madam eminent and unapproachable, however the madam actually smiled slightly holding out her hand to her, asking her whether she was willing to be her granddaughter.
All of the past was irreversible, Zhao Rui Zhi’s tears fell like rain, falling onto the madam’s body.
Gao Zhen’s subordinate wiped his sweat with his hand, seeing Zhao Rui Zhi firmly holding the Zhao madam’s corpse unwilling to let go, he couldn’t help yell, “She’s dead, why are you still holding her?”
Zhao Rui Zhi’s gaze seemed to ignite into a blaze, she said, “If anyone wants to touch her they’ll have to get pass my dead body.”
Nanny Li place her hand in her mouth biting it, crying she crawled over, kneeling in front of the madam’s corpse, she said, “And me, if anyone wants to touch the madam’s body they’ll have to step on my body!”
Many of the madam’s young and old servants also came crowding around, everyone’s face had a touch of blood, or their clothes were torn, or their complexion was a deathly grey, they had previously suffered a lot, but nevertheless they clenched their teeth using their own lives to defend the madam’s honour.
“You group of…” Gao Zhen’s subordinate stomped in anger, yelling, “You don’t want to live?”