“You look like a pancake that’s been sizzling on a frying pan.” (tn: Korean pancakes are fried dishes of varying sizes often full of seafood or green onions. I know it sounds weird, but they’re both lumpy and delicious.)
I clicked my tongue with my face looking as uneven as a bubbling pancake.
“Never you mind.”
The setting sun. A cool autumn breeze. And the creaking sound of the swing. The second I fell asleep, I ended up here. I could easily think of this as a dream, but that was almost certainly not the case. It’s probably best to think of all this as Nyangii’s magic. Because, otherwise, there’s no way I’d be riding a seesaw at my age. Across from me was Nyangii, up in the air as she looked down at me. Displeased with this arrangement, I put some strength into my legs and evened us out.
“What do you want?”
“Did I not tell you I wished to speak with you? Take a gander. Now it is you and me. Just the two of us.”
I looked all around me, but that ever-smiling changgwi was nowhere to be found. However, I wasn’t going to let myself be tricked. Maybe this is my personal bias, but I have a feeling that changgwi can pop up at any moment.
“For all I know, she could pop out at any moment.”
“Quite the suspicious fellow you are.”
“I’ve been burned a few too many times.”
I glared murderously at Nyangii, and she, the character once shrouded in mystery, casually ignored it.
“Have you pondered upon what I said?”
“Nope.”
Nyangii took her pipe out of an inner pocket and lit it.
“You truly are like a mackerel that’s been prepared for seasoning at the market.”
“As you can see, my head’s firmly attached to my shoulders.”
It was just that I didn’t have enough time to seriously consider what she said. Thanks to Rangii and Chii and Pyeii. Since it’s impossible to think deeply about anything when those adorable little brats won’t leave your side. Just imagine if you went through what I did, Nyangii. Do you think you could have even a single thought to yourself when Rangii’s tail is wagging, Chii’s hair is flapping, and Pyeii’s words are flying? It’s pure chaos, absolute chaos. In a good sense as well. Heheheheh.
“…So you really do like little girls.”
“Can you read my mind, too?”
I asked this, surprised, and Nyangii exhaled smoke. As if she were sighing.
“Take a look behind you.”
“Behind me?”
I turned around. Behind me was what looked like some kind of sci-fi monitor floating in the air and displaying a video of Rangii, Chii, and Pyeii lying on a bed.
And, for some reason, they were all naked.
“Uwaagh?!”
I stood up in shock. This caused the seesaw to drop Nyangii butt-first into the ground, and I realized too late that the other side of the seesaw was….
“Gugh!”
“Unyah!”
Ow. It hurt. It really hurt. Dammit. Only those who went through the same experience as me could understand this pain.
“How could you suddenly stand up off a seesaw?! Have you not a trace of common sense?!”
Nyangii carefully got off the seesaw, rubbing her behind as she yelled at me, and there was nothing I could say. Because this was definitely my fault. It had been so long since I last sat on a seesaw that I forgot this would happen.
“I’m in a ton of pain, too, so give me a break.”
“What a half-wit.”
Shut up. I changed the subject.
“More importantly, what the heck was that just now?”
“This is a place connected by our souls. You could also say that this space is governed by our minds. Thus, should you think of something strongly, anything is possible.”
Th-that means!
The second I had that thought, Nyangii’s eyes narrowed.
“What in the world are you thinking while in front of me?”
I turned around. I waved my hands like a madman through the image, erasing my fantasy. I can’t even bear to explain what this was all about.
“You’re quite true to your perverse desires.”
“W-wait! It’s not what you think!”
Dammit. I really have lost it. What did I do wrong to end up like this?
“It’s hard to control your own thoughts!” I said pitifully.
“Such an excuse is almost pathetically accurate.”
I couldn’t say anything.
“Not to mention you thought not of Snowy, but of that Bear Clan bimbo whose only strengths are her massive breasts and strong envy…. Tsk tsk.”
“Hey, are you kidding? It’s a crime to imagine Rangii like that.”
“True. Because Snowy is criminally cute. Her tail wagging in accordance to her emotions, her childlike naiveté and innocent ignorance of the world, and her purity, her inability to suspect guile or trickery from others. Though I am describing my little sister, I do not want to spend even a single moment away from my absolutely, undeniably adorable sister. Do you not feel the same?”
My mouth dropped open. Th-the brat in front of me is a fanatic. A siscon. Nyangii brightened up the moment she began talking about Rangii, and this told me that she was serious. Though, strangely enough, a video didn’t pop up behind her.
“Ehem.”
Nyangii, perhaps embarrassed that I was so dumbfounded after her emphatic praise of her little sister, cleared her throat as she made the ashes from her pipe disappear with her tail.
“That’s enough idle chat. This is not why I am here.”
“Please, by all means,” I said.
“I am here for me. Me,” she repeated.
I thought I spied Nyangii’s ears twitch just now, but I might have been mistaken.
“Do not speak of extraneous matters and answer me. How much have you understood of my words?”
It seemed to me that she was the one speaking of extraneous matters.
“Why should I answer that?”
“You are like an eel that entered a pot along with tofu. I am putting myself in danger in order to help you.”
“If you want to help me, then disappear to somewhere far, far away. I miss my normal life.”
After I said that, a nasty sneer spread across her face, a face that didn’t belong on a child.
“Hah! That means you haven’t found the answer to my question. Otherwise, you wouldn’t be prattling on like that.”
I was annoyed. It wasn’t fun being the target of such a condescending gaze, as if she knew everything. I already have Saehee to do that, thank you very much.
“I bet I’d feel the same even if I did know what you were getting at.”
“You are a fool. An utter fool who does not yet know if he is wild ginseng or of cultivated stock.”
A flash went through my mind. It was as if a goddess’s gift shined brilliantly before me, and I was so engrossed in thought that I paid no attention to the emotions I showed on my face. Because my thoughts were busy elsewhere. And if, just if, my realization turns out to be true, then….
“Hm. It appears you have finally understood my words. In that case, I shall gift unto you another show of goodwill.”
Nyangii’s words brought me back from my thoughts. I need to pay attention. I can always think more about that later. Right now, I have to focus on the brat in front of me.
“What kind of goodwill are you talking about?”
“Do you not feel joy upon realizing something you did not know?”
“Regardless, you wouldn’t call this goodwill.”
Especially not when those words are coming from someone whose true intentions are unknown.
“You truly are a sauce dish-like boy.”
I was lowered from a regular dish to a sauce dish.
“Does that mean you have no desire to listen to my question?”
“No, I didn’t say that.”
This and that are wholly different. I may have no idea what she’s plotting, but there’s a high possibility that what she says next is going to be essential. Because, even if I only realized it now, her first question really did have to do with my life.
“I suppose my words will finally connect, then.”
A nasty smile spread across Nyangii’s face, an unreadable expression that Rangii could never have made.
“I am overjoyed that you are finally willing to….”
“Enough. Get to the point.”
I was in a really bad mood. After I said that, Nyangii pouted, and her tail stood straight up.
“Do not cut me off! Just who do you think I am, boy?!”
“Rangii’s big sister.”
This caused Nyangii’s jaw to drop.
“…You truly do lack common sense.”
“I’m only human.”
“And yet you still planned on becoming Snowy’s husband? Is it not par for the course to learn more about phantoms if you wished to do so?”
I had an immediate retort.
“If there’s anything I need to know, I can always rely on Saehee to teach me.”
“You would trust one who is no different from compost on a summer’s day even though you have realized the truth?”
I didn’t answer. Nyangii apparently expected me to respond differently, because she sighed and changed the subject.
“Then I shall tell you. With Snowy subdued by the seal, I have acted in her stead to rule over the phantoms and….”
“No, I don’t really care about that.”
That wasn’t what I was curious about. The truth was I couldn’t care less about that topic. I just wanted her to hurry up and tell me what she thought was her goodwill but that I felt was simply meddling.
“Just ask me the question.”
“Grrr….”
Nyangii was furious. She ground her teeth and growled as she stared at me with murder in her eyes.
“Now I’m not going to tell you even if you ask me to! Hmph!”
“If I wanted to know about all that, I could ask Saehee. So get to the point.”
Her tail was straight as an arrow.
“You truly are a villain! An absolute villain! Bastard! One who deserves nothing more than to be covered in breadcrumbs and fried to a crisp in oil!”
Nyangii was so upset that she started huffing and puffing while stomping her feet. What, did she expect me to do something?
You probably already noticed, but she isn’t exactly looking out for my best interests. That’s partially the reason why I’m being so hostile with my words. I felt the need to try and do good by Chii and Pyeii when we first met, but that isn’t the case here. Don’t forget. She’s the phantom who almost got Chii killed and used Pyeii to further her designs. Plus, she tried to lecture me on things I really couldn’t care less about. Though I couldn’t help that I let her get away with more than I should have: she simply looked too much like Rangii.
“Fine! Absolutely fine! I’ll tell you what I wanted to say and disappear.”
Nyangii pointed at me and said:
“Why do you think that my pretty little Snowy is in love with you?”