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Jidou Hanbaiki ni Umarekawatta ore wa Meikyuu o Samayou
Author: Hiru Kuma

The Determination of a Vending Machine

I've only just noticed it recently, but it seems like I'm becoming less aware to dangers that imperil life.
I guess when I died once and my body became a vending machine, losing its senses and ability to feel pain, I've become dullwitted when it comes recognizing my own death and others' deaths.
Hyurumi and Shui had ended up in such a state, and it's natural to want revenge, but having personally seen such a difference in power, I should have calmly thought about it. If I truly treasured my comrades, shouldn't I have tried to stop them -I'm only thinking this now.
Well, that I'm thinking this way is because it's this kind of situation, after all.

["If you can reach me, I wouldn't mind being your opponent, but … oh, the super strong girl carrying the magic tool is also here? Hm, you've done well for such a short amount of time. So my expectations from hereon out can be greater with this?"]

His telepathic voice carries well, na. He's not even within one meter of me; so it's sent out randomly in an extensive region.
The Ruler of the Netherworld seems to have found Ramis and gives an appraisal-like opinion. He's floating elegantly above the dead center of the crater, overlooking the hunters.
Looks like he doesn't have even the slightest thought that he'll lose himself. The way to defeat an overwhelmingly strong person is to strike unexpectedly without letting your opponent display his abilities. That's it. History has shown that the most conspicuous method of assassination is effective.
It seems that the time to show the effort that I, together with Ramis and Hyurumi put in, thinking of different patterns in order to realize that plan.

Well, that plan has actually already started, though.
One of our conditions, that the Ruler of the Netherworld spots Ramis and me, has been confirmed and cleared.
So I should build up my resolution, huh? There's the function that I took; it's a transformation into a vending machine that exclusively sells ice, but there's actually another unacquired on another function list.
It's something that appeared when I became Rank 2; Compared to the other vending machine and functions it costs way more points so I didn't feel like taking it, but I acquired it now.
However I can't change into that vending machine yet. First, by expelling the air from within I can make fine adjustments — and arrive directly beneath the Ruler of the Netherworld.

Right now I'm high in the sky above the battlefield. Using the chaos of the explosion magic as cover, I, who became the in the , was sent flying by Ramis throwing me into the sky with all her strength.
By the way, what Ramis is currently carrying is a vending machine-like foldable box that Hyurumi made in my form. Since before the battle, I was wrapped up in the box that looks exactly like me, but one size bigger.
Because that's the case, even when I attacked with the 's nozzle, I had transformed inside the box so I didn't appeared to have changed to other people. That was why the nozzle had to come out of the box's retrieval opening.

Returning to the matter at hand, when I change into the while flying through the sky, I filled the inside of with balloons at a speed incomparable to before my use of dexterity, observing the battlefield from above.
Using on the balloons to manipulate my position, I've locked on to Ruler of the Netherworld in the sky. I return to my normal vending machine for now, and from that I'll transform into the form of the largest vending machine in Japan, the newly acquired .
I was introduced to this vending machine through the TV, but it was placed at a certain fishing harbor; its total length is over eighteen meters long, and its appearance looks like the form of a long and thing, 4-story building. There's no way a vending machine maniac like me wouldn't go to see it.

That giant frame is falling straight from the sky.
The might of this crash is going to be incomparable to my vending machine attacks thus far. I'm going to score a direct hit on that puffed up skull-!
The howl of the wind is loud enough to be annoying, but I'll ignore something like that, focusing solely on falling onto the Ruler of the Netherworld's cranium.

[Now then, my dear, floundering hunters. I'm eagerly looking forward to strong warriors who can reach me to appear, so … What is making that wind sound…]

The Ruler of the Netherworld, who was joyfully beginning to say last boss-styled lines, looked around him here and there, then suddenly raised his face towards the sky. The The jaw of the Ruler of the Netherworld, who was in the posture of staring at me, fell open with a clunk; even though he's a skeleton, you could tell that we had taken him by surprise.

"Wh,wh,wh,what is that -!?"

It's a vending machine-!
The Ruler of the Netherworld raised his staff in a panic, and a gray wall spread out from the staff's tip, but I'm going to ignore something like that and charge in-!

My barrier and the gray wall clashed. At that instant, a shockwave rippled outward, and the monsters in the area were flipped over and sent flying.

"Uuuuugh, what, what is this-!"

Hearing the Ruler of the Netherworld's flustered voice, a little of my grudge towards him was alleviated.
The Ruler of the Netherworld, unable to endure the shock of the fall and the heavy weight in the air, and is now pushed until he's standing in the crater, bracing himself.
This isn't enough to finish it. But that was also taken into consideration.
This vending machine was put out in order to provide fishing boats with a large quantity of ice. The amount of ice this puts out isn't anything to laugh at.
In this situation, there's a large amount of ice falling. The ice that spilled over the gray wall fell into the crater. Probably because the ground's still hot from that explosion magic, the ice quickly melted into water.

"Wh,what, this is chunks of ice … no matter what you think you might be able to do to me with something like this -"

Even though he's holding up my body and soaked in water from the melted ice, he's talkative.
It's not like I thought this alone would do anything to him. But see, that's not all I've got. Just why do you think I temporarily returned to my normal vending machine from the giant body previously?
I pull out the
Since I've raised the value of my Strength the might of the electric shock has surpassed the limits; I dip the electrodes in the water and ignored the safety mechanism as I forcibly activated it.

"GUAAAAAAA What's with this electric shoooooock-!"
I'm not hoping to kill him, but if this surprise attack can make him lose consciousness than I'd be happy. That's right, because his defenses will become unstable.
The giant vending machine crushing him was a way to put the Ruler of the Netherworld into a situation where his concentration is disturbed as he's barely able to withstand it.
His defenses shatter and I, with up, press down onto him with my body. With his last struggles, he used all four arms to push, but he was unable to catch it, and his bones shattered and he was submerged underwater.
The moment he hit the water, a splash like a geyser shot up, and it became the signal that this battle was over.

Amidst the spray falling like rain was me, a single appliance in the crater. I haven't reached my time limit yet, but let's return to the usual vending machine.
It seems like the monsters in the area disappeared at the same time the Ruler of the Netherworld was thrown down, so I can see hunters lined up around the giant crater's edge looking down.
All the faces from the Clear Lake Level are also among them. Looks like they're all safe. What a relief.

"Hakkooooon! You okaaaaaay? Yooooooou're not huuuuuuurt?!"

With her hands at her mouth, Ramis' voice reverberates within the crater.
I'm fine, perfect shape even. Right, I want to reply to Ramis, but there's something I want to double-check, so I check my current abilities.
At that moment, I spread out and at the same time fire off "TOO BAD," into the surroundings at maximum volume!
Ramis and the hunters, who were rushing over, stopped their movements. Shit-, it's not over yet —

[Hooh, there was something that could push me this far.]

I voice I never wanted to hear again reverberated within my head. As I thought, not dead yet, huh? Just now, what I checked was my points. Even though I defeated the Ruler of the Netherworld, my points didn't increase one bit.
So basically, it meant this guy was still alive.
The liquified ground roiled in front of me, and from there the staff with the intertwined skeletal arms design came up. Just like that, the staff ascended into the sky and was suspended in the air ten meters above the ground.

[This is a valuable staff, so I shall retrieve it. Now then, ladies and gentlemen. One part of my body … although it was my transformed left arm, you did well defeating it. This is something that deserves praise.]

That monstrously strong Ruler of the Netherworld that we thought of as our opponent, that guy was only a transformed left arm? … You've got to be kidding.

[Ideally, I wanted to take care of all the skilled hunters together here, but it seems I was too greedy. Well, my original goal was realized, so I suppose it's fine.]

His original goal? That thing Hyurumi was worried about, as expected, there was something to it.

[Oops, I don't mind if you attack this staff, but right now I'm going to talk about something all of you might find valuable. Allow me to warn and advise you, it might be better for you to listen to it.]

At his words, the hunters who were about to attack the staff at the break in his speech restrained themselves. It's also possible he might be trying to buy time, but when he says something like that, it makes it difficult to attack.

[This is a reward for you, who have defeated one portion of me. My original goal is to gather all the skilled hunters here.]
Hyurumi had predicted this much, so I wasn't surprised. The problem is what's next. Exactly what is he going to say? I absolutely must hear it.

I keep thinking that maybe next week will have nothing going on and I'll get a break … but I also keep forgetting that this is life, and it NEVER stops (preferably it won't stop. Anytime soon)
… Well, I could also manage my time a little better, maybe …>

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