"That I had a beautiful, wonderful chick in my life, and then I screwed up. So I was trying to buy her love back."
"I can't imagine that moving Cameron."
"Well, he needed the cash." I knew exactly how true that was, and this explained how he managed to take Sofia out for a nice dinner last week.
"It's a beautiful gift. Thank you so much."
"So, you're grateful now right?"
"I guess, why?"
"'Cause maybe there's something you might like to do for me...." Jake's shit-eating grin appeared.
I laughed and kissed him. He was a perv, but he was my perv.
66. California Dreaming "Frankie, aren't you coming to bed?" Jake's voice called out from the bedroom.
"Just a sec, I'm talking to Luke," I yelled back. I had been back in the house for over a week, and today was my last day of work. Angela had been extremely complimentary and encouraged me to apply for a real job there once I finished my master's degree. Apparently a postgrad degree was the minimum for getting in the door of the museum.
"Okay, tell me exactly what was said," I watched Luke's excited face as he told me about his contract negotiations. Luke seemed to have an inferiority complex when it came to his position on the team, and he was delighted that the GM was talking a multi-year, mega-buck deal. This seemed to be proof that they were committed to him.
"I've been talking to my agent, and he thinks I'm too cautious. If you want something like a no-trade clause, you have to be willing to give up salary." Luke shrugged; he hadn't come from a ton of money, and he was pretty careful with his dollars.
"Well, weren't you telling me how much your friend, Alex, was enjoying being with a new team? Getting traded isn't always the worst thing that can happen. You should negotiate hard to get the best deal," I reassured him.
He nodded, "Yeah, he loves St. Louis, and he's been tearing it up there. Maybe you're right, I love L.A., but you never know...."
Suddenly, Jake appeared beside us in only boxer briefs.
"Great, Frankie, are you trying to get rid of my roommate and best bud? Come to bed before you do any more damage." I stuck my tongue out at him, and he picked me up, put me over his shoulder, took me to his room, and threw me on the bed. I couldn't stop giggling, and Jake jumped on top of me.
"Get off me, you brute."
"Oh, brute? That's not what you were calling me last night. Pretty sure I heard stuff like amazing, perfect, sexy." He laughed and kissed me.
"I can still hear you guys," Luke called out, and Jake kicked the door shut. A faint thank you was heard.
"Y'know Frankie, I just remembered that you have a little black nightgown that I haven't seen you in yet...."
"Oh yeah, my Christmas present. I was supposed to seduce you in that!"
"Well, now's your chance."
I skipped off to put it on.
Since I had finished work, I thought I'd have tons of extra time, but I seemed to be as busy as ever. I had made a lot of new friends and Jake loved entertaining his buddies. It usually guys from the team but we also had special visitors from Kingston.
Andrew and Chloe decided to take advantage of a long Easter weekend to come and visit us. Now that I was sleeping in Jake's bedroom, we had a spare bedroom for them. They claimed it was a little break before the final slog of exams and papers, but I suspected that Chloe really wanted to see the realization of all her dreams: Jake and I actually dating.
"Don't let me worry about getting a job while I'm here," Chloe pleaded. "I promised Andrew I'd take a mental break." We were having a leisurely breakfast while Jake was at practice and Andrew had gone along to watch. The playoffs were beginning next week, so Jake seemed to have even more practices and meetings.
"Okay, I can certainly distract you with shopping. There's an awesome flea market in Pasadena that we can hit up." I had finished work, but now I was staying here an extra month until my classes started in early May. I thought I'd have tons of free time, but I seemed to be as busy as ever. Anne Rhodes had claimed me for a planning committee on next year's charity events, and I was helping Franco organize an open studio event.
"I think I'd rather be distracted by hearing about you and Jake! You two are so adorable together." Chlo hugged her knees, and grinned. "How is it all going?"
I laughed, "It's going pretty well, I think. I give Jake lots of space, and he goes out with his teammates whenever he wants. We entertain a lot; apparently Luke's been bragging about my cooking, and now Jake invites everyone over to see how good they've got it. We go out too, it's all fun."
"But what's it like between the two of you?" Chloe leaned in closer.
"Well, of course I don't sleep in the guest room anymore." I giggled embarrassedly and Chloe blushed. I would never talk about what went on behind Jake's bedroom door, but it was certainly an important part of our relationship. "He's so sweet these days. Jake's a really affectionate person, and I like the feeling that he finally trusts me enough to be officially together." I found it hard to put in words exactly how Jake had changed. But I liked the way he was more affectionate in public, and more talkative in private. I could see it was hard for him to adjust, but I think he was letting his guard down.
"So, what's going to happen next?"
I sighed, the future was something Jake never wanted to discuss. He had to focus on the playoffs, which I understood, but I had to make plans too. I couldn't do nothing and keep hanging out with him, as he seemed to assume. "Well, in the short term, I'm going back to U.B.C. for May and June, to finish up my degree. Then we're talking about doing a driving holiday up the Pacific Coast Highway."
"Are you going back to Kingston?"
"Of course. Jake's dying to get back to the cottage. Will you be there too?"
Chloe shook her head and frowned. "I don't know, probably not. If I do get a job, it would be in Toronto, so that's close anyway. So what about next year?"
"That's the hard part. I've been looking into Master's degree courses. Of course I could take some here, but my parents are not too happy with the whole situation. They think I'm getting too involved, too quickly. And without their help, I would not be able to pay the U.S. tuition costs." I couldn't even get a job this summer; between my courses and travelling with Jake, I wouldn't be in the same place long enough.
"Oh dear, that's too bad. Have they even met him?"
"Yes, I flew up when the Kings played in Vancouver, and we all had dinner together. They do like Jake, but they're worried that I'm making too many sacrifices for him and it's going to affect my career prospects. I know they're right, but Jake's important to me too. It's a quandary."
"Gosh, I hate to say this, but Jake does make a lot of money. Can't he help you out?"
"I can't ask for that. I'm already living with him, and I need some kind of independence. I don't feel comfortable getting money from him, especially at the stage we're at." I could also see that there were already a lot of people in his life wanting things from him, and I didn't want to be another one. I felt okay about the household expenses, because I knew I contributed with all the things I did around here, but tuition was a huge expense.
"Actually, I found some course catalogues in the guest room," Chloe said. "But they were for Italy!"
"Oh those. Remember Liam? Well, he wasn't totally useless, he actually inspired me to look into Masters courses in Italy. I was thinking about them before I got back together with Jake. Don't they look amazing?"
"Yes, studying in another country is something I've considered too. I had applied for this program at the London School of Economics, but I didn't get accepted." Chloe sighed, "I am on the short list if a spot opens up, though."
"Wow, that's great too. I mean, people from around the world apply, right?"
"Yes, but even if I got in, I might defer it. I do think it might be better to get some work experience first. At this point, I'm interested in practical applications of the theory I've studied."
"Oh Chlo, it's so nice to talk to you! Around here, nobody even understands why I want to do a Masters. It's the minimum you need for a museum job here." Most of the girlfriends had told me about the sacrifices they made, giving up jobs and friends to follow their men around. Having your own career was tough, since even if you could get a job in L.A., the guys would want to leave here once the season was over.
"Ahhh! We're talking about jobs again," said Chloe, looking a little frazzled.
"Sorry! Let's get ready and go out for a walk on the pier. The guys should be home in an hour or so, and we can all go out together then. I have a little sightseeing tour specially planned for you, it's Joss Whedon's favourite hang-outs in L.A.!"
"Wow, really? You remembered that Andrew and I love Firefly!" Chloe exclaimed.
"Please, how could I forget? How many times did I have to watch that stupid show?" I laughed.
Jake I drove Andrew home after practice. Luke was staying late to do some rehab on a sore shoulder.
"So, whatdja think?" I asked.
"Pretty different from our rep team practices back in the day," Andrew said. "Although a few of the drills looked familiar, except you're doing them at a million times the speed and velocity."
"No shit. Sometimes when I'm lined up by the boards, it feels like I'm still ten years old." We both laughed. Andrew and me had played on the same teams for years.
"You're lucky, dude. Living the dream."
"I guess so. Good thing too, because I'm not good at anything else."
"C'mon. I could totally imagine you working at Mickey D's, asking if I wanted fries with that," Andrew laughed. "So, you're free for the rest of the day? What are we doing?"
"We'll go home and see what's up. I'm starved, so lunch first. After that, Frankie's probably got everything planned out."
"So you and Frankie. How's that going?"
"Uh, it's good. Well, the part with Frankie is good." I was kind of worried that she was going to change once we started going out. Like Tracey who turned into a complete bitch, or even Aspen, who turned more clingy the longer I saw her.
But Frankie was pretty much the same as always, maybe because she had lived with us for so long. I thought having her around might mean the guys wouldn't hang out as much, but it was even more. Half the team wanted to come over for Frankie's dinners. And I had hardly eaten out at all since we started going out.
Of course, it wasn't all about the food. Frankie was very feminine; like her dresses, the way she didn't want to deal with stuff like spiders, or how she hid behind me during the scary parts of movies. But she was sort of like a guy in some ways, or maybe she was used to guys: lots of gross stuff we did didn't seem to bother her at all. She laughed at dirty jokes, teased the guys, and just took off to her room if the testosterone levels got too high. And like a guy, she loved to have sex; she never acted like she was doing me a big favour by getting me off. But she did expect to come as much as I did, and that was fine with me.
"So what other part is there?" Andrew wondered.
"I dunno. The relationship shit. I keep screwing up without meaning to. I mean, I haven't had to answer to anyone since I was fifteen, so it's tough to remember that she wants to know stuff." I was used to doing exactly what I wanted whenever. It wasn't that Frankie was stopping me, but she liked me to text her if I wasn't coming home, and to plan stuff ahead. Sometimes I'd forget things she told me, and it would be a big deal. And when I did go out, there was still a ton of temptation out there. "You know one thing that's whack? Some chicks are even hotter for you when they find out you've got a girlfriend. It's like they're all competitive or something."
Andrew snorted. "Maybe that's only for pro hockey players, it's not something I've noticed."
"Really? I thought it was a thing."
"Well, actually now that I think about it, there was this one girl at school who never paid attention to me until she saw me with Chloe."
"I'll never understand chicks." We were stopped at a light, and a blonde woman stopped beside us, lifted her sunglasses and gave me a big smile.
"What's that about?" Andrew asked, when we both had taken off on the green light.
"Maybe she recognizes me, but probably it's about the ride. The more expensive, the better in L.A."
"So, chicks here like Mercedes better than Mazdas? Guess I better stay in Kingston," Andrew laughed. I liked that about Andrew, that he liked his life and never seemed to envy mine. We could still hang out like the old days.
As we drove up the street, we saw Frankie and Chloe walking home. I slowed down and called out to them.
"Hey, you ladies want to ride in style?"
Frankie laughed and walked over to the driver's side window. She bent down and I could see right down the top of her little dress. "I don't know, my mother told me not to accept rides from strangers." She reached one arm in and pushed the hair off my forehead. "Especially sweaty ones."
"I've got candy," I told her in my best dirty-old-man voice.
She winked at me. "Oh, I know you do... and it's delicious." Then she leaned in and kissed me. Fuck yeah, lunch could wait.
67. Frankie Says Relax Jake Frankie was fast asleep in my bed when I got back from San Jose. Her long brown hair was flowing across the pillow, and her sweet face was relaxed and peaceful. I hardly ever got to see her all calm like this, and she looked so beautiful. I lifted up the sheet, and she was wearing this red nightie that was totally hot. Her tits were all mashed together under her arm and that looked hot too.
I tore off my clothes, threw them on the floor, and got into bed with her. I kissed her on the neck, reached around and started feeling her up.
"Wake up, Frankie!" I whispered in her ear.
She turned away from me. "Wanna sleep," she murmured.
"Don't you want to hear about my game? We won, so there's going to be a game six here!" We flew straight home, and I was still wired. There was no way I was going to be able to sleep right away. Sex would be relaxing. I slid one hand down to pinch her nipple and started pulling up her nightie with the other. I ran my hand down her hip and then between her ass cheeks.
Now she was wide-awake. Frankie turned and looked up at me, "I watched your game, congratulations! You played great."
"So, you want to celebrate?" I asked her.
"You are such a horn dog," she complained, but she wrapped her body around me as she spoke.
"Yeah, but that's what you like about me, right?"
Frankie came to game six and sat with the other girlfriends. The game was yet another total battle where they'd score and then we'd tie it up, three times in a row. In the end, our power play couldn't get it done, and we went down in overtime. One thing that really sucked was that all the playoff games we won were on the road, and we never pulled one out for the fans at home. We saluted them at centre ice and then skated off into the long summer.
Totally fucking frustrating.
After I got out of the dressing room, I gave Frankie a hug, and then told her honestly, "Look, I just wanna go out with the guys tonight and get hammered. You can take the car home, and I'll get a cab."
She looked up at me, a little sadly, and nodded. "Okay," was all she said.
"Don't worry, I'll be a good little boy," I told her, pissed. I didn't want her to make me feel guilty.
Frankie shook her head, "I didn't say anything." And then she left.
The sunshine was streaming in my bedroom when I woke up the next morning. Ah, California, the sunshine state, as opposed to the rain forest I grew up in. I was sleeping in my old bedroom. I usually slept here when Jake was on the road. If he was home or coming home that night, I slept in his giant bed. Last night I decided I didn't want to be woken up by a drunken booty call, so I went back to my bed.
I got out of bed, stretched, pulled my silk robe on, and went to take a shower. I noticed that Luke's door was closed, but Jake's was wide open. Not wanting my morning noise to wake him up, I went to close the door and when I reached in I realized why the door was open.
Jake was not home.
I started showering on automatic. Feeling the pulsing water streaming on me was calming, and I tried to think logically. Really, the fact that he wasn't home didn't mean that he was sleeping with someone else. He could be crashing at a friend's place. He could be passed out in some bar or hotel lobby. He could be hurt and at the hospital. Or he could be in jail.
You know you're in trouble when you're hoping your boyfriend is in jail. Really, none of that stuff was plausible. Luke was home. Why didn't Jake come home with Luke? And if not Luke, he could have come home with another buddy, lots of his teammates lived around here and could have dropped him off, regardless of how out of it he was. I had to stop thinking about this; I didn't want to imagine all the icky details.
I got out of the shower and started towel-drying my hair. I looked at my sober expression in the mirror, and realized the real problem was trust. I didn't trust Jake 100%. Probably that was my own fault: I laid down the ultimatum, and then he had started going out with me. That wasn't exactly the same as Jake begging me to be his one and only.
Still, who could blame me for having trust issues? When we went out after games, girls came up and fawned over him. Or worse, occasionally girls seemed to know him already and acted way too familiar. Even at home I wasn't safe, I was vacuuming under the sofa cushions and along with the loose change and mummified pizza crusts, I found enough jewellery to start its own QVC show.
That was the past though, and I had pushed it to the back of my mind and tried not to be jealous. But the worst part was Jake's face: sometimes when he looked at other women, he was checking them out; he was interested. Because that's the truth, you can't be jealous unless the other person gives you a reason to feel that way. You could be dating the most beautiful man in the world, but if you knew he was committed to you, you wouldn't worry.