I got off work and when I got into Jiang Li's car, I instantly found the atmosphere was not very good.
Jiang Li's face is cold and makes people instantly feel a sense of coolness. He drove the car without glancing sideways, did not care about what I meant and did not bother to be sarcastic.
I nervously sit in my seat, not talking. I think that today Jiang Li must have suffered a loss and is sulking over it. Although I don’t dare talk to him, I am curious and also want to worship the person who could make Jiang Li this angry…… I really want to visit that person, and if possible, make them my master……
But I suddenly thought of a problem: Jiang Li's mood is very bad, definitely need to vent, if he vents…… Then I would be the unlucky punching bag right? I am inwardly crying tears, why am I this tragic ah…..
Sure enough, just as we returned home, Jiang Li starts to find a fault. He leaned against the door and looked at me sitting on the couch with a straight face. "Guan Xiao Yan, you have nothing to say to me?"
Although I am afraid he will bully me, I am disgusted with this kind of finding fault behavior, so I expressionlessly replied, "Jiang Li, you have nothing to ask me?"
Jiang Li walked over and threw a magazine in front of me: "Look at the seventh page, your masterpiece."
I felt it was baffling, opened the magazine to the seventh page, and recognized someone. Page 7 is an advertisement photo. Covering the whole page is Wang Kai's and my clothing that complement each other with a big smile. For the first time, I realize that my own smile was quite brilliant and the look in Wang Kai's eyes and his expression were all very appropriate. He looked at the Little Red Riding Hood emotionally, that look containing some warmth, some passion, some pampering….. If you look at this photo by itself, absolutely no one will believe that he is actually a big-tailed wolf that likes all kinds of women.
So I admired this ad, sincerely lamented, "This picture was shot too successfully, I have to save it, to leave a memory." And to insult Wang Kai.
I just finished speaking, Jiang Li suddenly snatched back the magazine, sneering. "The affair is out and you are still so righteous?"
What the, what did you say?! Whose affair is out, who who who! I was a bit startled by Jiang Li's words, retorted. "Shooting an ad is an affair? Please have a little common sense okay!"
Jiang Li: "Shooting an ad also means to smile this happily?"
I think that Jiang Li is being unreasonable, so I wave my hand and said, "Ok ok, I know that you are in a bad mood. You can throw whatever cups, dishes, bowls, and utensils in the kitchen, just don’t find trouble with me…… And again, if I am to have an affair, what does that have to do with you?"
"I….." Jiang Li is at a loss for words, stopped, and finally said, "I just suddenly noticed, your taste is lower than your IQ."
I coldly harrumph and said, "I am very suspicious, are you jealous of me? To tell you the truth Jiang Li, in this life, have you never been on a magazine before?…… Of course, except for the marriage notice, oh. Saying that this big sister not only got featured in a magazine but also shot such a beautiful ad. Also……" I stopped there, stood up and patted Jiang Li's shoulder, meaningfully saying, "To be honest, I understand your feeling. We are after ordinary people. In fact, to be famous, it is very difficult." I found out that my thinking is seriously off topic, how did it change to this….. You should not ask me how I think, I also don’t know how I thought of this. Anyway, I just strangely said it. Maybe it is because of the eight-year-old dream to become a star after all most people at the bottom of their heart will want attention. Of course, the impact of my ad, the probability to become famous is at zero.
Jiang Li listened to my words, coldly laugh and swat away my hand, saying: "Shooting a second-rate ad and being on a third-rate magazine and you become like this? To be honest, I am too lazy to be in this kind of magazine."
I nodded seriously: "The grapes that cannot be eaten will forever be sour."
Jiang Li held his chin, thought for a moment and suddenly remarked, "Actually getting featured in a magazine is not that hard."
I think that his words are very funny. "You are joking. How about let’s place a bet?"
"Then let’s bet," said Jiang Li, throwing away the magazine in disgust. "Pick any magazine that is on a higher level than this one. If I can get featured in it, you lose."
"Ok, I still don’t believe. You really think you are something." I think that Jiang Li has become narcissistic and lost his sensibility, but taking into account that he may be able to sell it, I added: "You cannot shoot an ad like me, you should have an interview."
Jiang Li nodded without thinking. "No problem."
I am a little guilty, afraid that Jiang Li really will have two brushes, so I said: "Then let’s choose ZZ Fashion."
Jiang Li answered even more simply. "Ok, let’s choose that one."
This time I really have doubts. Jiang Li this guy have really gone crazy. Does he not know how high the threshold ZZ Fashion has? In other words, ZZ Fashion is the nation’s top fashion magazine. To be able to earn an interview with them are all those very successful people, have a very interesting and tasteful life and of course, sensibility to fashion have to be very high.
I look at Jiang Li, shaking my head. Actually, Jiang Li seems more like an unemployed youth. Well, successful people — if he really is a successful person, then his wife, me, should know of it right? So this one, pass. To say a tasteful and interesting way of life, other than being a bit of a germaphobe, does not like spicy food, the others are nothing special and he dislikes the smell of perfume. So this one, pass. Finally, fashion sensitivity? What a joke. A person with high fashion sensitivity, will they hold a third-rate magazine to brag? So, fashion and Jiang Li have absolutely nothing in common. Pass.
In short, Jiang Li's body from top to bottom only favorable is that place. If ZZ Fashion is a magazine that shows a lot of skin, then perhaps one of the pages will show it — of course, it Is very likely to be covered.
So I smugly smiled: "You just wait and admit defeat. Do you think that ZZ Fashion is something that just anybody can get into?"
Jiang Li is full of indifference. He begins to consider the issue of betting: "What to bet and what do you want most?"
I replied without hesitation: "Money.”
Jiang Li: "Ok, then let’s bet with all our bank deposits. You lose, your money is mine. I lose, my money is yours."
I breathe in, Jiang Li's confidence sends my heart into a panic. He….. He doesn’t happen to know ZZ Fashion's editor or anything right? Thinking here, I hesitated and asked: "Jiang Li ah, you are very sure of this interview right?”
Jiang Li shook his head. "No, I don’t know the magazine that much."
I don’t believe it. "Then why not bet with me, are you not afraid of losing?"
Jiang Li: "I think that being featured in a magazine is not that hard."
Well, crazing thinking is not the same as normal thinking, especially a crazy narcissist, which I can understand. So I hate it more, and did not go Into detail of Jiang Li's brain structure….. I finally found out, Jiang Li's biggest flaw is his narcissism, wah ka-ka-ka, this time really feels good!
So I think I am not behind very far and asked: "Then, how much is your bank deposit?"
Jiang Li continued shaking his head: "Don’t know. Anyways it is more than yours."
I am again speechless, but thinking about his BMW and his big house, I admit it should be more than mine…..
Jiang Li: "Considering that I have more money than you, and if it is like this, it is not fair, so you should add a few conditions."
Me: "Sure." I should know that Jiang Li is not a fuel-efficient lamp.
Jiang Li: "If I win, you….. resign."
I am shocked: "Why?" My job now is very good ah, other than the boss being boring sometimes, the other aspects are very good, and a lot of money.
Jiang Li raised his eyebrows: "Not willing?"
Of course, I am not willing, thinking of the time when Wang Kai doubled my salary, ah, such a good job is hard to find ok!
Jiang Li: "If you are not willing then fine. I also thought that being featured in a magazine is not that simple……"
I grabbed onto Jiang Li's hand. "Willing willing, I am willing!" It is rare for Jiang Li to be this impulsive without reason, it seems that I have won this time. If I do not seize this opportunity, this life will definitely regret!
Jiang Li looked down at my hand, quirk his lips and said: "Deal."
My panicking heart finally settled. At this time Jiang Li said: "But I think you are taking advantage."
I stared at him and corrected: "Already made a deal, a gentleman should not go back on his words….. No, I do not believe your character, let’s a contract just in case."
I finish. Not waiting for Jiang Li to react, ran to the study and shua shua shua wrote two agreements. I signed my name and then gave it to Jiang Li. Jiang Li holds the pen, reluctant to sign. " I think it is not very fair, how about we don’t bet?”
I folded my arms: "No how can you back out, are you still a man ah……"
So, under the matter of "manliness" threat, Jiang Li honestly signed. I smilingly put away the agreement and start to envision the bright future where I am taking Jiang Li's things.
At this time Jiang Li's voice not so conveniently sounded: "Guan Xiao Yan, the day after tomorrow is my birthday, is your birthday gift ready yet?"
A single word brought me back to reality.
I am in deep thoughts.
I am thinking to see if this world has anything, something that won't need money, something that can allow a pervert feel first love and match his preference.
Why not gift him an artwork? General perverts usually adore artworks.
But should I gift something that matches up to Jiang Li's taste…wouldn't it be the same as making bankrupt?
Thus, I have decided to embrace upon a mission. I, Guan Xiao Yan will personally handmake a piece of art and give it to Jiang Li.
In fact, art is a very mysterious thing. Ugly things do not matter, as long as you boast it as a flower, then even the tiniest ugly things can make people fight to pay silver.
Due to the urgency of time and the limitations of the variety of art that I possess, I finally decided to gift Jiang Di a DIY ceramic artwork. No matter what I made, I did everything carefully to meet Jiang Li’s requirements.
So on December 24, that one day I applied for a temporary vacation. Holding He Zi, I walked to a large scale pottery shop.
When He Zi heard that tomorrow is Jiang Li's birthday and that it is only today that I will be preparing a present, she immediately knocked on my head and scold me for not being considerate. I was bitterly sad by her abuse….my heart thinking heck does she understand?
I think I have very artistic attainments, the owner also praised me….but that was because I can make an ordinary vase into a distorted mess. It is very rare. However, only He Zi is so narrow-minded. She said that my artwork is appallingly typical. I once again lamented, what do you know ah …
Of course, my words couldn't come out to refute her. Although my work is also a piece of art……even I can't help but squint at the ugly gift.
He Zi can no longer stand it and then made her own beautiful bowl. While touching her bowl, she remarks "Why don't we add a few words to it?"
I continued to stare at my pottery that couldn't get any uglier. It was originally ugly, if I add a few more markings to it won't it be even uglier? So stiffly laughed towards He Zi and agreed. "Fine, but you have to help me."
He Zi uses her elbows to bump me. "What nonsense are you spouting! This is your present to Jiang Li, of course, you have to do it."
I bitterly made out an expression with no comment.
He Zi seeming to understand my pain, then adds "Sigh, you stupid ah! Why do you insist on carving Chinese characters? We can try French, Japanese, or even Manchu Mongolian words. As long as Jiang Li can't understand then it is fine."
That also seems legit. I am truly stupid. Embracing all the hope I have, my eyes gleamed at He Zi. "Then, do you know French, Japanese, or even Manchu Mongolian words?"
He Zi shakes her head. "I am only responsible for ideas."
My mood deflated like a balloon.
At this time, He Zi suddenly pointed towards the poster by the counter. “Look, it’s all weird words! There’s definitely something we want.” While saying, she pulled me forward.
He Xi pointed to words on to top corner in the poster. "This, I know. It's happy birthday."
Nonsense, even I know that too.
He Zi's hands moved downwards. "And this is French."
Me: "Oh, what does it say?"
He Zi shakes her head. "I don't know, but I know that it is not "hello."
I suddenly have a deep urge to smack her butt with my feet.
Just when I was hesitating to commit the deed or not, a deep voice emits from our back. "That also means 'happy birthday.'"
He Zi and I raised our head at the same time to meet a bald uncle in his 40s standing close to He Zi. From the beginning to the end, his eyes were unmoving on He Zi's D cup.
He Zi straightened her back and retreated two steps backward. Her eyes releasing a dangerous gleam.
While our eyes were filled with hostility and contempt for the uncle, it had no effect on him. He walked absently to the front of the poster, pointing to the dotted alphabet below the French and said, “This is the German meaning of happy birthday. ” Moving his fingers, he continues, “Italian's happy birthday, and Spanish's happy birthday … ”
He Zi looks at his confident face and interrupts. "What about the last one?"
My line of sight also followed to the end of the few words. Those displayed characters that are much stranger. Anyhow that I have never seen before."
The bald uncle expressed embarrassment. “This seems to be Hebrew. As to what is meant …”
He Zi exaggeratedly laughed and said, “What does it mean? Of course, it means ‘Happy Birthday.' This old lady has learned Hebrew at the age of six.”
The bald uncle looked strangely at He Zi before finally putting it down with a smile and left.
I touched He Zi's shoulders and challenged her with a squinting look. "Little girl, at the age of six you still couldn't memorize the poem of 'Chu He Ri Dang Wu.'"
(T/A): 锄禾日当午 is the poem used. It is a famous child's poem used to teach a child of the hardships when farming and planting to bring food to one's table. If memory serves me well, that was what my teacher told me. In other words, it means the hardships to bear fruit to something.
He Zi glared at me before continuing, "Stop the useless talk and hurry to carve the Hebrew words."
I looked at the strange words. "Are you sure it is the meaning of 'Happy Birthday'? What if it is some sort of curse words? Then won't Jiang Li strangle me to death."
He Zi knocks on my head. "I say, can your brain have any more holes in them? All these other languages have the meaning of 'Happy Birthday,' how can these Hebrew words be cursed words?"
I pondered at her words before realizing the truth in her words. Thus, I took my stiff hands and craved the words. So what if they are curse words? Jiang Li will never be able to comprehend the meaning of it.
I covered the whole body of the vase with Happy Birthday in Hebrew, an ancient symbol that gave this abstraction an overwhelming sense of mystery. Along the perfect combination of modern art with traditional elements together, this is simply a genius masterpiece.
Of course, He Zi feels that my masterpiece has another version: neither good nor bad.
I hate He Zi, really really hate.
As I embrace my masterpiece, I walk home. It was night by the time I came back. Today is Christmas Eve, and on the way, I saw many brightly lit up Christmas trees. It was very pretty, only, I am not the type to believe in God but Buddha. Therefore, my interest towards Christmas diminished only leaving a festive feel.
Just as I walked into my house, in front of my face lies a big Christmas tree in the living room that shocked me. That Christmas tree was decorated with so many colored balls, colored lights, and on the bottom were filled with beautifully wrapped boxes. I retreated a few steps backward in fear. Looking at the door plate, I noted indeed this is my house.
I lightly walked close to the Christmas tree and circled around it. Then I aimed my shout toward the study room, "Jiang Li, is this plaything something you made?"
Jiang Li walked out from the study room and leaned against the door frame nodding. "Yes."
I touched my chin, contemplating. "I couldn't tell you are still so immature. At the age of six, I have long stopped doing this kind of thing…."
Jiang Li stared at the Christmas tree and with a poker face replied. "Yeah? They said that females tend to like this kind of stuff." As he talks, he turned his gaze toward me and asked, "You don't like this kind of stuff?" Giving me the glare, I can only interpret it as 'you dare not like it?!'
What the heck! I could only force nod and say, "I like it very much. How can I not like it? Hehehe……"
Jiang Li's line of sight suddenly fell onto the present that lied within my embrace. Walking to my front, his face was brightly lit with a smile. Lowering his head he questions, "What are you holding?"
The gleaming light from the Christmas tree brought a shimmering light reflecting on Jiang Li's face. This gave a strange beauty to him. I could only sigh that these type of weird situation only works for perverts like him.
I took hold of the box and shoved it to Jiang Li. While smiling, I said, " Jiang Li, happy birthday!"
Jiang Hu rubbed my head and then took the gift box smiling. He quickly opened the package. As a result, that ugly piece of artwork was exposed to him. He held the bottle and asked, “Where did you buy? This model is really … unique.”
I protruded my lips and proudly exclaimed all the credits to myself. "I personally handmade it. This type of brand is one of kind. How is it? Don't I have talent?"
Jiang Li gave me a complimenting smile and then flipped the pottery over to carefully study the words inscribed. All of a sudden, he lowly chuckled. His laughter was very pleasant to the ears but I only snorted. Turning around, he puts one hand on my shoulder blades and another wrapped on the pottery. Still while suppressing his merry laughter, he looked at me. "Guan Xiao Yan, I love you too."
By this point, Jiang Li was very close to me. So close that I could, in fact, feel his breath on my neck. My instinct flashed warning me of danger and I hurried to push him away. "What are you doing?!"
Jiang Li gently shakes the pottery as he laughed smugly. "Don't you love me? No need to be shy." I was turned off by his narcissistic attitude and so questioned his weird behavior. "Isn't it just a vase? Why are you like this?"
Jiang Li massages the pottery and time after time would gently tap on the character engraved. He lifted his brows and smirked at me. "Did you personally carve these characters?"
Me: "Yeah, you still don't know what these words mean? Come, let me teach you….."
"Of course I know." Jiang Li's lips hooked by its corner sinisterly. "This is Hebrew and it means 'I love you.' I should count this as your confession? This is pretty literal."
I coldly snorted three times before refuting. "Whatever Jiang Li, it clearly means 'happy birthday,' you don't need to prank me anymore." Jiang Li is not
The smile on Jiang Li's face fell and upturned. "You really don't know it's meaning?"
I continued to coldly laugh. "Of course I know, this means 'happy birthday.' You may not know these sort of things but I understand it well. Relax, this is something that only this lady can do. I am one of a kind…." Oh my god, I almost threw up at this part.
"Guan Xiao Yan." Jiang Li puts the pottery on the sofa and continues, "This means 'I love you' in Hebrew. I am currently thinking whether I should accept it or not."
My face became furrowed with anger. I took my notebook (laptop) that was conveniently lying around. " You don't know. I don't know. Only Baidu knows!"
Jiang Li ignores me and sat staring at the pottery for awhile. The finally, for a moment the silence was broken. "I have decided. Seeing you so passionate made me pity you. So I have decided to accept you."
(T/A): I was drinking water while I was translating. Yes, I have accidentally spilled it. Why is Jiang Li so cute?!!! OMG!! HE COULDN'T FIND THE MOMENT TO CONFESS SO HE USED THIS CHANCE TO START THE FIRST MOVE!
Immediately, I picked up a pillow and threw it towards his face. While scouring the net, I yelled at this shameless bastard. "Accept your ass! This old lady doesn't want to be accepted by a pervert!"
Jiang Li, on one hand, hugging the pottery so dearly, on the other hand, stayed silent. He neither refuted nor resisted. I could only found his current behavior a bit weird but continued to ignore him. I was too busy surfing the net for the meaning.
That was when I found it. I snatched the pottery from Jiang Li and matched the words one by one. I was surprised.
It was not the same. Really not the same.
The words on the pottery and the words on the internet were spelled differently. The Hebrew words were not the same.
I was suspicious that it was due to the carving of the words being too ugly that I could be wrong. After matching it, again and again, I have arrived at the conclusion, it was indeed different.
A hand stretches forward and snatched the ugliest pottery back. While embracing the pottery, Jiang Li annoyingly remarks. "Guan Xiao Yan, can you be any dumber?"
I was not pleased, so I searched the meaning of 'I love you' in the Hebrew translator and the result was like Jiang Li said.
I slumped against the sofa. My limbs were weak. "Jiang Li give that pottery back to me. Tomorrow I will bring you another one."
Jiang Li: "It's alright. I only like this kind of contorted stuff. For example, this pottery. Another example…" He looks up with his eyes pointing at me. "You."
(T/A): I died.
My chest was heaving up and down. I wanted to choke the heck out of him. Immediately I wanted t to grab the pottery away from him. I can't lose this big of a face to this kind of person.
Jiang Li sensitively picks up a hint of danger and immediately stood up hiding the pottery behind him. Lowering his head, his voice contained a tone of a sneer. "Guan Xiao Yan, can you be any more better? The things that you have gifted, can you still shamelessly take it back?"
I could only slump on the sofa not moving. My head was filled with anger that I wanted to pound myself onto the wall.
Jiang Li was unforgiving. He squatted down and patted my head. That feeling was as if he was raising a Golden Retriever. Then he padded his chin on the couch and watched me proudly. His face was very close to mine. I could see his long eyelashes shaking. The inner demon within really wanted to root out all these long weeds. This old lady is a woman but still, have no eyelashes of his length!
Jiang Li's eyes blink as they careful watch me. "Guan Xiao Yan, I think you did this on purpose. You actually want to confess to me, right?"
I rolled my eyes and sighed. "Please, even if I am no good I will never ask a pervert out, okay?"
Jiang Li: "The what if…I am not gay?"
I took my hand and comforted Jiang Li. Patting his broad back, I lamented. "Be a good child, this kind of thing has no what ifs. You are gay."
Jiang Li: "Then what if…I said that I am bi?"
Me: "Then…that is even more perverted. I say, don't tell me you are actually bi?"
Jiang Li stood up and condescendingly looked at me. Within his sleepy eyes, he retorted. "How can that be possible. You are the kind of woman that I will never look at."
I feel as if Jiang Li's word is weird but couldn't detect where. So I coldly snorted and replied, "Relax, you are the kind of man that I will also never look at."
In this complicated world, there are different types people that are hard to deal with. Some are difficult to the point of irritation, like Yu Zi Fei; some are difficult to the point of wanting to kill like Wang Kai; and some people are difficult to the point that leaves you with hopelessness, like Xue Yun Feng.
It all started with the 'not so peaceful' Christmas.
Talking about December 25th, everybody else celebrates Christmas while Jiang Li celebrates his birthday, which is actually quite unique. I wondered that Jiang Li is probably going to have a romantic dinner with his beauty, Xue Yun Feng, for the sake of his eyes I told him that I have some errands to run and would be returning home late, he expressed his skepticism and couldn't care less about me. Right after work, I followed Wang Kai and 'rubbed' a meal off him, afterward I got in his car and went to the pub looking for fun.
Anyhow, Christmas is a holiday, the atmosphere in the pub is quite different, there are some interesting shows going on. The festive atmosphere in the pub was overwhelming, we were all in the craze, submerged in noise, but I guess this is a way for urban men and women vent their pressure in life.
It was already 11 at night when I came out of the pub, the moment I stepped out of the door, my phone rang. I took it out and it's the ghostly Xue Yun Feng.
I picked up the call, the intermittent sobbing sound came from the other end, along with the sound of gulping water. I felt it was strange, only after several 'hellos,' Xue Yun Feng responded. He called out "Guan Xiao Yan," then it was again sobbing cries. I could smell the alcohol on him through the phone, this guy is probably drunk.
Although I am not exactly the nicest person in this world, I do have a soft heart, especially with such a cute Shota crying to me, my little heart couldn't stand it anymore. I spoke with worry, "What happened? Did Jiang Li bully you?"
The moment I mentioned Jiang Li's name, he cried louder, he cried as he shouted Jiang Li's name.
I pinched myself, covering the phone and said to Wang Kai, "You can go first, I got something to take care of."
Wang Kai stood with no intention to move. "Where are you going this late? Do you need me to protect you?"
I thought about Xue Yun Feng's physique. Maybe he can win a fight with me, but considering that he's already drunk, it shouldn't be hard to deal with. So I waved my hand and said, "It's alright, I will call you when it's needed."
"Alright, remember to call me first when things come up. Oh and," Wang Kai leaned over, rather mysteriously blinked his eyes, “Don't get on random men's car.”
Wtf haven't you had enough. I rolled my eyes at him and left.
It was too cold outside, I quickly went inside a fast food restaurant and called the drunkard, "Xue Yun Feng, where are you?"
Xue Yun Feng whined and said with stutters, "Mi….Mind your….own…bus…business….."
The hell? If you didn't harass me with your calls I couldn't care less about you, it's none of my freaking business! I have the urge to hang on him, but after some thought I realize that he isn't a bad kid, besides there are some nepticisms going on between us (if your husband's lover can be counted as nepticism), so I coaxed him patiently, "Tell me where you are, I will bring Jiang Li to you with an apology."
Xue Yun Feng, "You…..Jiang Li….."
Me, "Say it, where are you, Jiang Li is getting paranoid from waiting!"
Xue Yun Feng's voice lowered, I vaguely heard him talking to the waiter, "Tell her, where I am."
I was stunned, this dude is so drunk that he doesn't know where he is.
……
When I arrived at Y pub, Xue Yun Feng poured and served himself, treating alcohol as water. I ran towards him and grabbed him by the arm. I said, "Stop drinking, come home with me!!"
Xue Yun Feng won't budge. He shook me off and frowned with impatience, "Go away!"
Not mad. Not angered. Not triggered…. Fuck, I AM PISSED!
I took the glass in front of him and drank it clean, I wiped my mouth, "Xue Yun Feng if you keep drinking Jiang Li is going to leave you!"
Xue Yun Feng froze for a second, then he leaned against a bar and cried. As he sob he whimpered, "Jiang….Jiang Li doesn't want me anymore….wuwu…."
I was scared by him for a moment, drunkards are for sure the most difficult ones to deal with. So I coaxed him as if he were my son and patted his back, my gentle voice with the glow of motherhood, "Good boy, Jiang Li said if you would go home behaving yourself then he won't leave you."
Xue Yun Feng looked up to me with his big eyes, "For real?" That pair of drunken eyes with tears still hanging. Looking at his face with flowery tears pouring down, I can't pity him more than I do now.
So I hold the urge to take a bite of his face and said promisingly, "Yes, for real….now go home." Looking back at the times that I was with Jiang Li, I figured that I have learned nothing but improved my acting skills.
Xue Yun Feng nodded his head obediently, "Alright, let's go home."
I held onto the shaky Xue Yun Feng, walked out the bar crookedly and took a taxi. Thankfully Xue Yun Feng isn't completely drunk, he still knows where he lived.
The moment that I got on the taxi, Jiang Li called. I pressed 'Accept,' Jiang Li angry roar came through immediately, "Guan Xiao Yan where the hell have you been? Why aren't you home yet!!"
I looked at Xue Yun Feng, who is now laying aside. There are grudges and anger building up inside me, I yelled back, "Where I am has nothing to do with you!" I was trying take care of your boyfriend, isn't it strange that I am always the one taking care of YOUR boyfriend?!
After my roar Jiang Li calmed down. After some silence, he said with disappointment, "Today is my birthday."
I'm in confusion, "Didn't I already gave you a present yesterday?" Although that was a huge fail.
Jiang Li was triggered, "Not going do anything for my birthday? You think giving me an underdeveloped vase takes care of it?"
I highly doubt that the word 'underdeveloped' is meant to accuse me, but there is nothing I can do to him. So I hold my anger in and said, "Then what do you want?"
Jiang Li, "You know what, forget it, it's now already 11:55, just sing me a Birthday Song."
Me, "Jiang Li are you drunk also?" Only under stances where he's drunk he would do and say silly things like this.
Jiang Li said in a cold voice, "Are you singing or not? If not, let me think how should I deal with you……"
"Okay, fine. I'll sing, I'll sing alright?" I give up!
So in the dark and compartmented car, a soul-stirring birthday song began, in both Chinese and English. I can see from the rearview mirror the painful face that the taxi driver is bearing, and I said with sympathy, "You can laugh if you want, I have pretty a thick face."
The driver burst in laughter.
After listening to me sing, Jiang Li said, "Interesting, I have seen people who goes off tune occasionally, but it's the first time seeing a person who is occasionally on tune." Paused, then he continued, "Especially with the Birthday Song, won't ever see this in a hundred years."
WTF? What do you mean!!!
Jiang Li didn't feel my dissatisfaction, he said, "Actually today, you should've be with me."
I was a little confused, "Why?" Unless you want me and your little boyfriend to have a threesome? Oh my my, I'm a normal person okay?!
Jiang Li didn't answer, but switched the topic immediately, "Are you still coming back tonight?"
I wasn't following his logic. "Ah! Uh, probably…."
Jiang Li, "Who are you with?"
I didn't hide, "Your boyfriend of course, so dead drunk……I heard, you guys fought?"
Jiang Li, "Drunk? Good, good time for some drunken mistakes to happen."
I laugh, "Then get over here, take this opportunity and 'eat' him, such a pretty Shota must be delicious."
Jiang Li seems to be angered again, "It's our business, no need for you to step in."
Me, "I couldn’t have cared less."
Jiang Li, "Come back after sending him home, don't have extra thoughts on him."
I laugh. He actually cares about Xue Yun Feng. Why do they have to fight? So I comforted him and said, "How many times have I told you already, I'm not interested in gays."
Jiang Li didn't say anything. I added, "The only thing is that this dude make me feel like a mom."
Jiang Li snickered, "You wanna be a mom now? I don't mind helping you with it."
Me, "Just go die!!!"
Jiang Li chuckled and said, "Where are you, I will go pick you up later."
Jiang Li's sudden friendliness didn't make me feel quite right, so I said, "No need, he lives in the city, calling a taxi is quite convenient."
Jiang Li, "No, what if you meet a driver with a weird sense of beauty, and attempts to molest you?
The fuck? Just say molest, why do you have to mention the weird sense of beauty part? Could it have killed you to not torment me?
Jiang Li, "An hour after, I will wait for you downstairs of his apartment."
Me, "Jiang Li tell me the truth, what do you want?" I don't believe that he has good intentions.
Jiang Li, "If you really want to do something for me, then come back and cook me something…. I want to eat Longevity noodles, the ones where one strand of noodle make up the whole thing."
Me, "I knew that you didn't bear a good heart." Those things look easy but they are actually really complicated okay!?
Jiang Li, "Not behaving? There are some serious consequences after that….."
Me, "Fine, fine, fine, I'll do it. You are shameless!"
Jiang Li laughed with pleasure. I hung up the phone in immediate anger.
Xue Yun Feng lived close to his workplace, probably for the convenience of work so he rented it. I carried him up the stairs, found the keys from his pocket, open the door, find the bedroom, threw him onto the bed, took his shoes off, and finally, put a blanket on him.
Finally, done, I'm relieved. I wiped off the sweat on my head, grabbed my purse and walked out the bedroom. Upon opening the doors, a clear voice behind me said, "Are you leaving?"
I was startled by him and turned around. Only saw Xue Yun Feng leaning against the bed sideways, half lying. Clear and bright eyes with no sign of being drunk.
I looked at him with horror, shocked to the point that I was stuttering, "You..you..you…aren't you drunk?"
Xue Yun Feng's face dimmed, answered, "I just wanted to be drunk。"
Jesus Christ, so you are saying that you faked the whole thing? Pretending to be drunk so I can carry you back stupidly? Thinking about it made me furious, so I ran towards the bed, leaning towards him, choking him by the neck and shook him around, as I shook him I said, "How dare are you? Do you know how much effort and energy is wasted just by taking care of a drunkard?"
Under my claws, Xue Yun Feng's body is swinging like a puppet, he didn't fight back, but his eyes looked down and said, "What can I do. I can't be drunk, so I had to fake it."
I stopped and looked at him with pity. I was reminded of the times when Yu Zi Fei left me, I was always drunk at night, but due to my special physique I was almost immune to alcohol, so I would always drink a lot and fool around with a sharp mind…..Now thinking back, I was indeed stupid, who couldn't survive when someone left them?
I shook off my memories, patted Xue Yun Feng's head, smiling, "Good boy, don't binge on alcohol, it's bad."
Xue Yun Feng swung my hand away, unsatisfied, "I'm not a kid!"
I laugh, "I'm my eyes, you are a kid…..how about this, will you be my nominal son?"
"You……" Xue Yun Feng stared at me with his fierce eyes, lips trembling with anger, but no word came out of him.
The look on his face triggered my laughter, I pinched his cheek and said, "Shota, you are so cute."
Xue Yun Feng turns his face around, not responding to me at all.
I took my purse and patted his head, "Good boy, get some nice sleep, this sister is leaving."
Xue Yun Feng grabbed me by the hands. "Can…can you stay here with me?"
I looked back at his watery eyes, suddenly all of my defense went down. So I sat by his bed, smiled with charmed and said, "Handsome guy, you need a company?"
Xue Yun Feng's face turned red immediately, I have just realized how fun it is to tease a young and cut Shota, hahaha.
Xue Yun Feng skimmed through my gloating looks, lowered his head and said softly, "You look like you are enjoying yourself…… If I told you that Jiang Li is breaking up with me, would you be happier?"