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Rui’s perspective~

CSWH Chapter 27: Emotions

"……oh, Rui. You've come at a good time. I'll be adding these documents and these ones too. Both of them will be due three days from now."

Seeing the mountain of documents that was placed before me as my father spoke carelessly, I felt killing intent well up momentarily. I suppressed that killing intent and nodded.

After all, the reason father was transferring the documents to me was so that I could learn more through practical experience.

……although I do feel downhearted at the fact that father could finish all of these in a single day if he was serious.

"I understand, yes, that I do. In exchange, please don't go to town and stay at home obediently. Because last time you gave me documents, there were several I had to confirm with you, but couldn't."

"Ahh……fine, fine."

Father nodded in resignation.

Father…….the Head of the Armelia Ducal House, Romel, disappears quickly once you take your eyes off him.

During the times when he stealthily vanishes, he generally heads into town.

Well, since he finishes up his work perfectly, nobody can complain about it.

……it's just that when you have something you need to confirm with him, or when there is an urgent matter, it is inconvenient.

That is because the matters that end up circulating to father often have one or two peculiarities, and hence require detailed adjustments. Most of the time, without father around to confirm things, it is impossible to proceed with the matters.

"For now, I shall take care of these."

I left the room holding a similar amount of documents as what I had brought in……in fact, the amount might even have been a little more than that.

I involuntarily let out a sigh at the weight that I felt heavily pressing down on my arm.

Going out into the corridor, I walked towards my room.

Suddenly, the sight of the tower from beyond the window entered my vision.

It reminded me of the young girl called Mel that I met there.

……I had found out about the bandit subjugation while I was helping out my father.

It would be great if they were the same bandits that were the subjects of her revenge.

……however, how would she feel about that?

When I told her that nothing would be born from revenge, she said…….that even if there were only things to lose, and nothing to gain from it, revenge was the only thing she could choose.

……that being the case, then what about after she takes revenge?

The moment I heard her say that, that was the very first thing I thought.

Focussing everything into achieving a single goal, while throwing away everything else……yet despite doing that, what if that goal were to disappear?

When I thought that, I became worried for that girl.

That girl who was dangerously single-minded, and continued to run in a straight line heading towards her goal.

The reason why she shed tears in frustration at having lost to another, and why she was able to smile at being able to advance forward on her path, was solely for the sake of the goal called revenge.

Then the moment that revenge disappears, what would she cry for, and what would she smile for?

I wonder if that sense of loss will torture her.

It wouldn't cause her to break, will it?

I became worried.

I turned my gaze back on the documents once more.

Though I was worried about her, I will not be able to go to the tower in the near future.

I have gone to the tower several times since the notice came, but was unable to meet her in the end.

……that is why I at least left a letter there.

Since it was the first time I wrote a letter for something outside of a formal setting, I was considerably perplexed over what to write, but it was a good memory.

The next time I meet her, I think it would be good if she could at least get mad at me……if possible, I'd like for her to smile.

As long as she doesn't become crushed under the sense of loss, close her heart, and lose her emotions, then it is fine.

Rather than that, it would be much more preferable if she became angry at the irrationality of reality, while grieving at the fact that her goal was snatched away instead.

I wonder, just when was it that I began to feel that her lively face was likeable? Just when was it that I started to feel that I wanted to look at it forever?

Rather than an aristocratic child that barely shows any emotion on their face, only making a soft smile; I found that she who cried, laughed, and became angry……I saw that she, whose emotions changed so honestly, was exceedingly vibrant.

"……excuse me, Rui-sama. Romel-sama is calling for you."

A servant called out to me as I stood still.

"Father is? ……understood. Sorry, but leave these documents in my room for me."

"Certainly."

……in any case, let's hurry up and clear up the work in front of me.

Refreshing my feelings, I returned to father's room.

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