CSWH Chapter 20: My Frustration
Clang clang……the sounds of swords clashing resounded.
"That's it! Winner, Das!"
The referee loudly declared my opponent's name.
While letting out a sigh, I put away the sparring sword and left the arena.
It was the usual training menu.
However, the scenery reflected in my eyes was not the usual one.
Here is the Anderson Marquis House's villa in the Capital.
After that bandit uproar, I secretly came to this Capital's villa.
……for some reason, it was under the established setting of me being a guard/body double.
The real me was overly shocked at the bandit uproar and collapsed, and apparently is currently in the remote countryside in the Anderson Marquis Territory undergoing medical treatment.
……well, it probably was a problem for a child of nobility like myself to be wielding a sword out in the open.
Well, that was fine.
In the Capital, it wasn't only the Guard Corps participating in father's training, but also people from the Army and the Knight's Order, so the variety of opponents has increased.
There were quite a few new discoveries, so it was fun.
Even if I became unable to use Ojou-sama's……rather, the original me's room, and had to use a guest room instead.
Thanks to that, I became accustomed to taking care of my daily necessities by myself.
……somehow, I feel like my lifestyle is drifting further and further away from that of a Marquis' noble daughter.
Leaving that aside, I don't understand father's true motive.
……why did he bring me back to the Capital with this timing?
Speaking of things I don't understand, there was also father's current state.
I don't know why, but ever since my bandit uproar, I feel like father has been very lively.
It was as if a burden was lifted from his shoulders, and he had returned to being my original father……
Well……even if I say that he's changed, somehow it feels like it's towards a good direction, so it's fine.
It's been a while since I last saw him raising his voice and laughing together with his subordinates.
Also, father isn't the only one who's changed.
I have as well.
On that day, at that time, I fought for the first time.
It wasn't a spar like right now.
It was a real battle with the lives of people on the line.
I will probably never forget that moment.
For a while after that, I was unable to eat.
It'd suddenly become painful, and there were plenty of nights where I couldn't sleep.
However, there's never been a time when I was more aware of my own life than that time.
My blood became hot as if it was boiling, but my consciousness deep within me was terribly cold, and the unsurpassable degree of tension caused my body to tremble.
That sensation clung to the depths of my body and would not go away.
……despite that. No, perhaps because of that.
Lately I have been in a bad condition.
The match just now was the same, but I've become completely unable to win my matches.
My body couldn't keep up with my mental image.
Because of that, I unintentionally become irritated.
……not good.
I am still weak.
To say that my body can't keep up with my mental image, just what kind of weak-hearted things am I saying?
As if to admonish myself, I gripped my fist tightly.
"Oi, Mel! They're telling us to gather."
"Yes!"
I was called by my senpai, and followed after him.
Having been called by that name all this time, I've completely gotten used to it.
While I was walking, the gazes of the surrounding people who were also gathering there pierced into me to the point where it hurt.
I let out a sigh internally at this situation.
……at the Anderson Marquis territory, it was also like this when I first started participating in the training.
However, I feel like compared to before, the current situation was much worse.
It was probably also due to the fact that I was smaller compared to other people.
Why is such a little girl, this weak person, participating in the General's training that everyone is yearning for……the voices of their hearts were so clear that I could probably pick them up with my hand.
However, more than that, the reactions of the knights who were nobles……maybe I should just say that their gazes hurt.
I was tentatively a guard plus body double, but to outsiders it meant that I had become a commoner.
For the knights who had never spent time together with commoners up until now, their ability to interact with commoners was extremely bad.
Those from the Army also appeared to have some complaints, and if I had to say, I did as well.
Though amongst those from the Army, it seemed that father's close associates were taking an attitude of their own.
When in Rome, do as Romans do*……I probably wasn't the only one thinking that.
*T/N: I know Rome doesn't exist in this world, but this saying seemed to fit best in English.
When the training ended, I went inside the mansion.