Part 1
It’s been about two months since a lowly combatant such as myself has arrived here using a machine called the Interplanetary Teleportation Device.
The purpose of dispatching combatants here is to investigate the planet and to lay out the foundations for invasion.
We battled the ones that were here first, aka the Demon King’s Army, and it’s been one month since we agreed to a temporary ceasefire.
Currently, after the deadline for the temporary ceasefire passed, there were only small skirmishes with the Demon King’s Army happening every day. They were not trying to do any large-scale attacks.
It seems like they’re also wary of my fellow combatants that were dispatched from the Secret Society Kisaragi.
Currently, including myself, there were only ten of us from Kisaragi that were dispatched to this country.
First there’s me, Combatant No. 6-sama.
And…
「It’s been a while No. 6! Will today be the day we finally settle our long-lasting fight nyaa? 」
In front of me was a giant man with the head of a tiger. He was wielding a western-style sword in his hand while talking in a dignified manner with his calm voice.
「Just what I was hoping for, Tiger-Man-san. Since I have the memento of my loving subordinate – the magic sword something-Zapper, there’s no way I’d lose…」
That’s right, he was one of the executives dispatched from Kisaragi, the monster, Tiger-Man-san.
「Since when did Snow’s sword become a memento nyaa? More importantly, it’s not fair if only you get to use a magic sword nyaa.」
「At least give me this handicap since Tiger-Man-san is a monster with strength far beyond us combatants. Anyways, what’s up with you ending your sentences with nyaa? It’s making me sick.」
Tiger-Man-san was one of the mid-level executives from the Secret Society of Kisaragi.
Even though he’s ending his sentences in a weird way today, he’s a reliable person since he’s a veteran among the monsters.
「I heard that if I ended my sentences with ‘nyaa’, I’d become more popular. I ended with ‘growl’ before, but since it didn’t make me the least bit more popular, I’m saying ‘nyaa’ instead, nyaa.」
「Is it really true that you can get more popular by just changing how you end your sentences, then is it alright if I start ending my sentences with ‘nyaa’ too?」
After we reunited in this foreign nation, we were occupying the Grace Kingdom’s training grounds so that we could have a match in order to confirm just how much our skills grew.
「It’s not like I trademarked nyaa, so do whatever you want nyaa. Then… Here I come, No. 6! Show me how much stronger you got nyaa!」
「Just what I was hoping for Tiger-Man-san nyaa! Don’t think that us, combatants will always be weaker than monsters nyaa! Orahhhhhhh!」
We shouted while simultaneously raising our swords, and just like that our swords clashed…!
With the sound of metal clashing violently, something flew out midair.
「…Oh crap. What should we do Tiger-Man-san? The magic sword that I borrowed from Snow without her knowing, broke. 」
「D-don’t ask me nyaa. You were the one who brought it nyaa. No. 6, you were the one who said ‘let’s pretend being knights’ just because we’re in a western fantasy world; so it’s all your fault nyaa.」
A piece of Snow’s beloved magic sword was sent flying after it snapped in half.
While watching the tip of the sword impale the ground, Tiger-Man-san and I looked at each other.
Then, we looked to Alice for help. She was watching our match in a corner of the training ground for a while.
「Oi Alice! You can think up at least one solution since you’re high-performance, right!?」
「Help us, Alice nyaa! Isn’t there a way, Alice!?」
The one that was watching us with great interest while we were kneeling on the ground, was a beautiful girl-type, high-performance android that Kisaragi was proud of, Kisaragi Alice.
「I guess there’s no other way, Alice nyaa will lend her wisdom to the two idiots. Glue the metal back together so that it can be easily broken again, then return it back where you found it while pretending to not know anything. Since it’ll break soon in combat, say ‘It seems like you bought a dull one, we’ll go give that merchant a good beating’ while consoling her.」
「「That’s it!」」
Tiger-Man-san and I said that together after hearing from Alice who always self-proclaims to be high-performance.
In order to fix the broken magic sword right away, we grabbed the sword’s hilt and the tip. While we were trying to stick them together……
「— — —No. 6, where are youuuuuuu!!? I’m not going to forgive you today! Come out, I’m going to strangle you to death!」
At the entrance of the training ground, an ear-piercing voice was heard.
I instantly hid the piece of broken sword behind my back, while Tiger-Man-san, who was holding the other half, hurriedly crushed his piece with incredible strength, and threw it just as fast.
…He’s really done it now. Now, there’s no way to even fix it.
The one who appeared was this kingdom’s captain of the royal guards, Snow.
Although she’s a beauty when she keeps her mouth shut, currently, her silver hair was disheveled while her eyes were bloodshot on top of having a very serious expression on her face.
「Where did you take my precious sword!? Return my sword that I bought by taking out a five year loan, Flame Zapper! 」
With a cool head, I denied knowing anything about it to the approaching Snow.
「That magic sword went on a trip. It seems like something unexpected awakened. It said that the current you is unqualified and that it was going to go find its true master.」
「Don’t be ridiculous, there’s no way the magic sword would leave on its own! Also I polish it diligently until it becomes very glossy every day. In the one in a million chance that it actually awakened, there’s no way it wouldn’t accept me as its master…… Oi wait, what’s that you’re hiding behind your back?」
Snow was coming my way with big strides. Her movements stopped as soon as she arrived.
While I showed her the magic sword,
「Actually, the magic sword, that went on a trip, just returned a little while ago. It seems like it barely lost after fighting in a fierce battle with the Demon King. It called out your name with its last breath, and then as if it was satisfied, it changed back to an ordinary sword.」
「Aaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!」
After seeing that, Snow fell to her knees.
As soon as she held the sword’s hilt, Snow started crying as she looked at it.
「……Oi No. 6, this is a bit too hard to watch nyaa.」
「Since Tiger-Man-san is partly responsible, please do something about it. Since you crushed a piece of it, we can’t even fix it anymore.」
While Tiger-Man-san said there’s no helping it nyaa, he wrote something down on a small memo and started dabbling with the terminal stuck to his chest.
That was something Alice and I also had on our bodies. It was a teleportation device for sending memos to Kisaragi’s headquarters back on Earth.
It was through this that we, as combatants from the evil organization, could have equipment sent to us by exchanging atrocity points.
Then in front of Tiger-Man-san, a sword’s handle appeared.
Wait, this is……
「Flame Zapper– … The one that I’ve always washed before going to bed, Flame Zapper—- … The one that made me unable to sleep until morning because of the sheer joy from the day that I bought it, Flame Zapper– …… The one that I’ve held closely while sleeping during the cold winter days, Flame-…?」
The crying and mumbling Snow suddenly lifted her head.
Her eyes rested on the blade that Tiger-Man-san drew from a black sheath.
「Huh…!? W-what an amazing sword…! T-Tiger-Man-dono, where did you pull that astonishingly beautiful sword from…!?」
The thing that Tiger-Man had teleported was a Japanese Katana.
As if the sword maniac could realize its value from one glance, she didn’t even blink once as if her eyes were possessed.
After Tiger-man put the blade back into its sheath, he turned to Snow that was sighing ‘ah, ah…’ as if it was regrettable.
「I’ll give you this for your sword.」
「Tiger-Man-samaaaaaaaaaaaaa!」
Snow was shedding tears for a different reason while she was hugging the katana.
Then as if she realized something, she brushed her tears away and started to walk towards Tiger-Man.
「Tiger-Man-sama…… If you can give me something like this as if it was nothing, does that mean you have other swords as well?」
「I mean, I am a man nyaa. Since I don’t dislike weapons, there are many that are comparable… O-oi, let me go nyaa! Don’t stroke my chest fur nyaa!」
This girl… It’s so easy to read through her…
After Tiger-Man implied that he had other swords, Snow started acting cutely by smiling and sticking close to him.
「Heh, hehehe… Actually, from the very first time we’ve met, I thought that Tiger-Man-sama wasn’t an ordinary person. Snow has a very good eye for people.」
「When you first met me, you called me a demon while trying to cut me down nyaa. This doesn’t feel right so stop calling me Tiger-Man-sama nyaa.」
It seems like Tiger-Man didn’t like this, even though he changed how he ended his sentences to gain more popularity.
「Good for you Tiger-Man-san, since you immediately became popular.」
「I like little girls, so this one, that’s big in all kinds of places, isn’t my type.」
As expected, the executive and monster, Tiger-Man-san is pretty ridiculous.
— — —It was at that time when the sound of a bell ringing could be heard within the city walls.
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Snow was thinking all kinds of things from Tiger-Man’s comment, but as soon as she heard that, her expression turned serious.
「It must be an enemy attack! Oi No. 6, let’s head out! This is the perfect opportunity to get more achievements! … Hehe, hehehehe…… I’m going to test just how well the sword I received from Tiger-Man-dono is going to cut…..!」
While looking entranced at the sharp blade of the katana, Snow let out those troubling words.
Part 2
The sound of gunpowder exploding roared far under the starry skies.
Every time I fired the assault rifle in my hands, demons fell here and there.
「Ora ora, I’m an employee of the Secret Society Kisaragi, No. 6-sama! All you small fries, as a gift for your trip to the afterlife, remember my name!」
「Commander! I’ve been thinking this for a while, can you stop saying these lines!? It makes us look like we’re the villains!」
The artificial chimera, Rose, sent the demons coming closer flying and said those words in a hesitant voice to me while I was laughing and devastating the enemy.
「You idiot, are there such things as villains during a time of war? The victors are always right! Those on the side of justice always say they’ll win. In other words, the victors are always just! Regardless of the fact that I usually do something bad, as long as I win, it’s a just act!」
「I’m an idiot, but even I know there’s something wrong with that logic!」
Tiger-Man-san was leading the other combatants excluding me. He was repelling the attacking the Demon King’s Army in another area.
The squad under me was ordered to take care of one enemy company that seemed like it consisted of only their elites.
Normally, it’d be seen as reckless for a squad of only five people to take on a whole company. But out of all those from Kisaragi, I’m the oldest elite combatant. The one with the unshakeable confidence in himself, No. 6-san.
Since Alice and I had access to modern technology, we overwhelmed the Demon King’s Army that didn’t have any heavy weaponry with the power of our weapons.
While Rose was frightened by me randomly firing my gun and roaring in laughter, Snow started approaching me with a satisfied face.
「Oi No. 6, there’s still too many enemies, use that strange weapon of yours to eradicate them all! I’m satisfied since I’m done testing this sword! Let’s talk later about how sharp it is, it really cuts right through- 」
「I don’t want to hear about any grotesque things like that! Well, look forward to it, I’ll chase off the Demon King’s Army for you. Hahahahahahaha! Who wants to die next!? Come forward no-」
With the sound of a click, the assault rifle stopped working.
「Huh. Ah, something’s stuck, wait, I call a timeout…!」
While seeing me hitting the rifle that had jammed, Snow’s expression froze.
「O-oi No. 6, we’re getting surrounded! H-h-hurry! Speed it up!」
「You idiot, don’t rush me! Stop shaking my hands, it’ll take longer! Where’s Grimm!? Grimm’s useful in these occasions!」
Grimm, the archbishop that worshipped the God of Disaster called Zenalith.
Because the disaster god worshipper has a unique nocturnal lifestyle, she doesn’t really move around during the day, but she’s useful in situations that involve a lot of enemies.
「If it’s for stopping the enemy’s movement, if she just…」
When I turned around while trying to eject the bullet, I saw Grimm drooling and sleeping on her wheelchair.
「She started sleeping as soon as the battle started.」
「Just leave that sleeping, useless girl behind!」
A lizard demon came flying at me while I shouted at Rose.
Just when I thought it’d reach me, it got hit with a shotgun blast from the side and let out a weak scream, then it stopped moving.
「I’m alive, Alice! You really can do anything sometimes!」
「That’s because I’m the high-performance, beautiful girl, Alice nyaa. Enough about that, look ahead. More are coming.」
As if waiting for Alice’s words, I saw a bunch of demons approaching before my eyes.
After transmitting the memo that was prepared beforehand to the Kisaragi headquarters, I fired my assault rifle.
Just when the demons’ spirits broke, I grabbed what was sent from Kisaragi headquarters and threw it far.
「Cower in fear, you small fries! Behold the power of technology!」
The highly explosive bomb was thrown into the middle of the crowd of demons. While we ducked for cover, the bomb obliterated the demons— —!
Part 3
When we returned to the town, the awaiting people cheered for us.
「You did well, Man in Black!」
「You’re amazing, Man in Black! So cool!」
「Commander Snow, thank you for your service!」
「Zipper-Man! Lower that zipper!」
When saying ‘Man in Black’ they were referring to my cool self wearing the Kisaragi-made battle suit.
Because of our continuous string of victories, lately, we’ve been treated with a lot of respect…
「You damn braaaaat! I’m not going to let it go today! I’m going to shove mentos and coke up your ass!!」
TN: If you don’t know how mentos (mints) & Coke interacts, watch this clip on youtube: Mentos-Coke Interaction
「Uwaaaaahh—! Just because I called you out for not being very mature for an adult, Zipper-Man! Someone! Someone help—!」
As soon as I started chasing the damn brat that was calling me Zipper-Man, the soldiers, that came to greet us, became flustered and stopped me.
「Combatant No. 6-sama, I apologize for telling you this when you’re angered, but Tirris-sama has entrusted me with a message for you. She wishes for you to come see her after you’ve recovered from the fatigue of today’s battle. We’ll reprimand the boy, so please, for today… No. 6-sama. N-No.6-saama! You can’t do something that harsh to a little boy!」
— — —After arriving on this planet, we became regulars to a bar in the suburbs.
「Then, to celebrate today’s brilliant victory, cheers!」
「「「Cheers!」」」
After finishing up today’s battle, we immediately came here to drink after receiving our reward.
「……Kyaaaaa! This is the best after work! Oi, I’ll pick up the tab today, so drink up!」
「Hey, No. 6. Before buying other people drinks, pay me back the money I lent you first.」
For some reason, Alice followed us to the bar even though she couldn’t eat or drink. She quickly said something boorish.
「Commander, thank you! I really like you whenever you buy me food, Commander! I also admire you a lot!」
「That’s right, I don’t dislike it when you’re being generous! But since you’re loose with money, I’m going to have to deduct points from you as a potential husband!」
「Haha, stop complimenting me so much. If you keep this up, I’m going to have to treat you guys again when it’s payday!」
「Did you really take what those two said as compliments…?」
While she was sipping her drink, Snow mumbled as if she was tired of our talk.
「By the way, this is pretty unusual for you, Alice, to follow us to the bar, since you can’t even eat. Did you receive an eating function from Lillith-sama?」
「You… After Snow found out about our spy work, in the end, we weren’t able to hide our agenda. Well, since you’re pretty stupid, I guess we’d have been found out eventually…」
Currently, our position in this nation is pretty strange.
I’m a foreign mercenary that’s also a commander leading a squad in this nation. I’m pretty much a liaison between this nation and the Secret Society Kisaragi.
And for some reason, although Snow was reinstated as the commander of the royal guards, she was also a part of my unit.
In her own words, she told me that she was assigned to observe me, and she even had a triumphant look on her face when she said that. But I could only think of it as a front for trying to chase out a troublesome person.
I’ve already told them the fact that Alice and I were from another planet.
When I first explained it to them, they looked at me as if they were looking at an idiot. But now, it seems like they believe that I’m some kind of wizard that came from another world.
「I followed you here as part of my investigation of this planet, since it’s possible that the food, normally eaten by these aliens, is poisonous to earthlings. Do you even know what kind of meat is served right in front of you?」
I quickly came to my senses, and as I carefully looked at the plate……
「Hey, old man! My usual order that comes out with a different type of meat every day… Just what kind of meat did you serve me right now?」
「What? You were eating that without knowing anything? Today’s meat is orc. Because of the ongoing battles with the Demon King’s Army, orc meat is pretty cheap right now.」
As soon as I heard the store-owner talk, I pushed the dish away.
「Commander, what’s wrong? If you don’t want it, I’m going to eat it, okay?」
「Even though you were so against eating grasshoppers, I see you have no resistance when it comes to eating orcs… You know they’re orcs, right? The ones we always fight against… They can speak human languages and are pretty much bipedal pigs?」
Although I’ve eaten some nasty stuff for the sake of survival, no matter how bad it gets, no way am I going to eat intelligent lifeforms that can talk.
While Alice was still investigating a piece of the dish with great interest, Snow snorted in laughter.
「For someone that likes to bluff all the time, I see you have quite a delicate stomach when it comes to eating. Because there’s a lot of wilderness in this country, there’s not enough water, which means the vegetables are pretty scarce. But if it’s meat we’re talking about, they can be found walking around everywhere. If you’re picky about what to eat here, it can lead to your life being in danger. Here, I’ll give you some Supopochi and Poison Spoiler.」
「Stop it! Stop trying to make me eat something strange! Just hearing the name of the second one makes me think that it’s dangerous!」
As soon as I tried to return the dish that Snow wanted me to eat, Alice suddenly opened her mouth.
「Hey, tomorrow’s a rest day for both of you guys, right? I’ll compensate you, so if you don’t have anything to do in particular, can you help me out with something?」
「Well, I don’t really mind, but you do know that that this No. 6-sama commands a high wage for hire?」
「…This is for something you also have to do.」
Alice said that as if she heard something ridiculous. Rose turned to her and seemed sorry.
「I’m sorry. Grimm told me to leave tomorrow open because there’s something important to do…」
「Mhm. Tomorrow’s the monthly Zenalith meeting. If you guys want, do you want to come see it? Although it’s called a meeting, it’s only the two of us, Rose and myself.」
「What’s that? I kind of want to go see it.」
Just when I became a little interested, Rose raised her head as if this was the first time she heard of this.
「I don’t remember hearing anything about that!? You told me that it was like a tea party where I have a really good time and listen to words of appreciation!」
「Talking about Zenalith-sama is something really enjoyable and to be appreciated! I’ll also hand out tea, so you better come! I already bought you a meal for this! You can’t say that you’re not going to come anymore, you know!? Besides, you’re one of the few believers of Zenalith-sama. 」
「I don’t remember ever joining!? Commander also gave me a badge from a strange organization! Everyone, please stop getting me involved in strange matters!」
After casting a sideway glance at Rose causing a ruckus, Snow’s expression brightened up.
「How much is the pay? In order to pay off the loan on my sword, please let me do it! So, just what do I have to do!?」
Snow brought her face right in front of Alice’s, who pushed her away with annoyance.
「The content of this job will be the investigation of that.」
She pointed at Snow’s plate while saying that.
Part 4
This planet’s natural environment is extremely harsh.
Most of the land on this continent has faded red, and is pretty rough. There’s also apparently a dangerous ecosystem that has developed within the lush, green forest.
Alice and I were inside that dangerous forest…..
(Look at that No. 6, that’s a Moke-Moke! It’s pretty delicious when it’s boiled! Let’s burst in over there and catch it!)
(How is that called a Moke-Moke! Are you taking me for a fool? For something with such a cute name, it looks way too atrocious! If it discovers us, we’ll be the ones eaten!)
Inside the forest that was thick with trees, we were hiding in a bush while observing the brutal, giant creature.
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If I were to describe it with few words, it’d be a giant crayfish the size of a storage shed.
It was holding the belly of an equally large snake in its claws.
(Just boiling the meat of a Moke-Moke will make it soft and it’ll even remove that fishy smell, so it’s really tasty. The origin of its name is mainly because of the way it cries moke-moke…)
(Explanations aren’t necessary, just stay hidden so that we don’t get tangled into this and get eaten!)
While Alice was filming the fight between monsters of the forest with her digital camera, she asked a question.
(By the way, it seems like the organisms of this planet really don’t follow the laws of physics. That’s how it’s possible for that crustacean to grow to that size. For reference, which one’s the Moke-Moke?)
(Moke-Moke is the one with the claws. The one that looks like it’ll be eaten is a Supopochi. That one’s pretty delicious as well.)
(This isn’t the time to have an easygoing conversation, let’s quickly run away before they discover us!)
I was half-crying when I said that to the two leisurely people.
(Woah? Look No. 6, the Supopochi is beginning its counterattack. So instead of constricting their prey, the snakes of this planet strike with their tails, very interesting.)
(That was the Supopochi’s killer move that can only be used a few times. We’re in luck to be able to see it.)
(You guys, can you please stop talking like there’s something wrong with your heads!? Alice, this should be enough right!? Let’s go somewhere else!)
The investigation of this planet’s ecosystem…
Although this was a direct order from Kisaragi to fulfill this mission, I really wanted to go back right now.
While being on the verge of tears, I began to move. Then I heard behind me, the Moke-Moke letting out a triumphant cry of victory. — —
「— —Snow, why’s a Supopochi dangling from that tree? Do the organisms within this vicinity make jerky?」
「What you’re pointing at is how the Kachiwari Tribe marks its territory.」
TN: Kachiwari is crushed ice in JP
「Let’s go back! There’s no way we can mess with that! Can you guys not sense danger!? That thing looks just like skewered meat!」
After distancing ourselves from the Moke-Moke, we discovered the traumatizing sight of a Supopochi’s head dangling from a tree.
「Kachiwaris are very hostile, they’re very territorial. They have enough strength to calmly live within this dangerous forest. The origin of the name comes from when they discover a prey… They’ll keep hitting its head with a blunt weapon until it looks like shaved ice…」
「I told you I didn’t need an explanation! For a while now, I’ve been having this strange feeling that something is watching us! Since they’re very territorial, let’s get away from here! Just what is going on right now!? You two are normally the first ones trying to bail!」
I pushed Snow forward. I was trying to get away from this place.
「Don’t underestimate me, No. 6. That may be the case if my pay was low, but since Alice promised me a great amount of reward money, I’m going to be the perfect guide. I’m someone that acts in good faith when it comes to fulfilling promises for money.」
… It happened just when she was making a lot of noise.
The sound of something hard being hit against a tree could be heard.
That sound was coming from somewhere close.
Not just close, it was also coming from the direction of where I felt we were being watched from…!
「Judging from the sound occurring in regular intervals, it seems like it’s calling for his friends.」
「Right on the mark, Alice. This is the sound of a Kachiwari tribesman calling for its friends when it finds a beast…」
Before they could finish what they were saying, I ran away from our spot— —!
I wonder just how far I ran.
I shook off that whatever tribe, but when I looked around me…
「Those guys are MIA…!」
I thought they’d be right behind me, but those two were nowhere in sight.
More importantly, I didn’t know which way was which.
Even my watch, with a built-in magnetic compass, was useless since I was on a different planet.
「Haah– I’m exhausted! Damn, just where could they be frolicking around! I can’t believe they’d act so relaxed when it was an emergency situation… I need to lecture them once I get my hands on them!」
Although I was mumbling complaints in anger, of course, nobody responded.
Within the forest that was getting darker, I heard the occasional cries of beasts and started to get a little nervous.
「…Well I guess I could be a little in the wrong, since I left you two and ran away. I’ll just forget about the lecture and forgive you. So if you’re somewhere nearby, it’s okay to come out. I’m not that angry anymore. I mean, in that situation, you might’ve not been able to move because of a cramp in your leg. Since there’s also the fact that I ran away right from the start, there’s no particular reason for me to be mad. Yup.」
Even though I was talking to myself in a loud voice, since it was still dead silent within my vicinity, the only things I could hear were the cries of beasts.
Even if I tried to contact Alice, since there were no radio towers set up on this planet, there’d be no point calling her cellphone.
From the start, did she even have a cellphone?
Even if I get a walkie-talkie sent here, unless the other person also has a walkie-talkie…
「Ah, that’s right!」
I can just explain the current situation on a memo and send it to Kisaragi Headquarters. I can just tell Alice to come my way.
Since she’s a smart girl, once she finds out my location, she’ll be able to make her way here.
I exhaled deeply after relaxing a little. Just when I was about to send the memo— —
「Moke-moke-moke!」
I heard a distinct cry coming from behind me.
As soon as I turned around while trembling… I didn’t know how long it’s been there, but there was a Moke-Moke with a claw missing…!
Thinking that it was dangerous, I spread my arms out wide and started screaming!
「Moke-moke-moke-moke!!」
「Mo-!?」
Because of my sudden strange behavior, the Moke-Moke became surprised and took a few steps back.
Towards the Moke-Moke that was looking my way as it was foaming bubbles from its mouth, I also yelled ‘moke- moke’. In order to not be looked down upon, I shortened the distance between us…!
It was at that moment.
「Mokeke…」
Just after letting out a small cry, as if to say we’re not enemies, it lowered its claw.
I wonder if it accepted me as a comrade because of how bravely I imitated its cry?
Now that I think about it, even after all this time on this planet, I still didn’t know anything about it.
Even if this thing looks pretty brutal, there’s a chance that it’s really just a friendly animal.
Although this is rich coming from a member of an evil organization, he’s a friend that I’ve made within this dark forest.
Towards the Moke-Moke that looked at me and extended its claw my way, I shyly-
The Moke-Moke, that I was about to shake hands with, was split into two, starting from the head.
「Have a taste of thiiiiis!」
Along with Snow’s shout, my friend became food.
Part 5
On the way back after completing the investigation of the Great Forest’s ecosystem.
After making it back to town, we happened to meet Grimm and a tired-looking Rose.
「Oh Commander, welcome back! How was the investigation of the forest? Anyways, please listen to what I have to say! Grimm was acting seedy and there was almost a crisis because she nearly summoned an undead!?」
「Commander, good to see you! You look pretty lifeless, did something happen? Now Rose, there’s plenty of grilled skewers! So you’re not going to say unnecessary things right!?」
Grimm shoved some skewers into Rose’s mouth, just as she was about to say something concerning.
「Within the Great Forest, No. 6 was nearly eaten by a Moke-Moke and I helped him out so that might be why his condition is off. There was also a period of him going MIA by himself, so it might just be because he was traumatized by a lot of other things.」
「Just what are you saying after you suddenly killed my friend! You even dipped him in soy sauce before eating him right in front of me, you cold-hearted bitch!」
That Moke-Moke was murdered by this girl just because she mistakenly thought I was being attacked.
「Wh-what’s wrong with you, you bastard!? I helped you out and you didn’t even say a word of gratitude! From the start, why’s it even a bad thing to eat the Moke-Moke on the spot where we killed it? It’s impossible to even carry that huge body all the way here! And, weren’t you also eating that delicious meat while you were crying!」
「I did eat it! I also ate it, buuuuut!」
The reason I ate it was to properly pay my respects.
There’s nothing that could be done about the fact that he was hunted down, but in order to make sure that his life had some meaning, I ate his flesh while crying.
「More importantly, Rose, tell me clearly what you were just about to say! Grimm, did you actually try to summon the undead again!!」
「What’s wrong with that? I’m a believer of Zenalith-sama that presides over the undying and disasters! What’s so wrong about an archbishop calling forth a servant!?」
When Grimm snapped back, Snow grabbed her by the head and proceeded to strangle her.
In the meantime, when Alice heard their conversation, she was a little surprised and asked,
「Did you just say undead? By that, are you referring to what’s commonly known as ghosts or zombies?」
Grimm smiled a little at the android that becomes interested in anything.
「Oh Alice, are you interested in Zenalith-sama now? That’s right, what I just called forth was a ghost. From the very beginning, I was drawn to Zenalith-sama because of his wonderful doctrine of exacting revenge on those you hate by inflicting eternal pain on them. How about it? Do you want to register on a trial basis?」
「Since I have no interest in religion, no thank you. Hey No. 6, apparently a ghost, the archetype of the occult has appeared. An existence has appeared to pick a fight with someone who follows the principles of science. What’s that about a ghost? I’ll bust that for you with the power of science.」
Alice said those words even though she’s an android that’s pretty much an occult-like being.
「I don’t know what you don’t like about ghosts, but you’re being unusually aggressive right now. There’s magic in this world, so why is the occult any different? Didn’t you also see Heine of the Flame’s magic firsthand?」
「I don’t care about something like magic. No, it’s not like I don’t care, but those things classified as superpowers are already being thoroughly researched by Kisaragi. Heine of the Flame’s magic is a typical example of pyrokinesis. In other words, magic is simply a sixth sense.」
She quietly explained it to me slowly so that I could both understand and be the only one able to hear it.
「Please dumb that down a little more so that I can understand better. Pyro-what? Six-something? Is that a dirty word?」
「I’m saying that the fire magic that Heine used is the same thing that those called pyrokinetics from Earth use. It’s something that anyone can use after having their brains poked around during Kisaragi’s reconstruction surgery. But, a ghost is a completely different story. I will never accept an existence from something suspicious like the occult.」
「Since you’re also a suspicious existence yourself, why can’t you forgive something like a ghost?」
At that moment, Grimm most likely overheard what was said since she forced herself into our conversation as if she couldn’t ignore it any longer.
「Wait Alice, are you saying there’s something wrong with my cute ghosts? You do know, that if you doubt the power of Zenalith-sama, you might receive divine punishment?」
「The ‘curses’ you cast are merely powerful, hypnotic suggestions. Zenalith isn’t real.」
While Alice was getting hit by Grimm due to her treating the God of Disaster that Grimm believes in as fake,
「I tried to look into magic beasts during today’s investigation of the ecosystem such as on what principle a griffin can fly even though it goes contrary to the laws of aerodynamics, and how the crustacean known as a Moke-Moke can maintain its huge frame. Since there’s a lot of things that I’m interested in, I’ll reveal everything for you.」
「From the start, you were going to reject this fantasy world to the very end. But you saw Grimm die and come back to life… And did you forget that her head was missing back then?」
「Even a lizard can continue to live even if its tail gets cut off. Did you just assume that Grimm was an ordinary human from the start? She could be an unidentified organism that’s masquerading as a human.」
「Uoooooooh!」
From being considered as some kind of nonhuman being, Grimm finally broke down and started strangling Alice’s neck, but after seeing Alice’s unchanging expression, she became even angrier…
「Fine, if you’re saying that much, I’ll show you my necromancy! I can’t let this slide after you called Zenalith-sama a fake. But since I used up all my mana today, I can show you tomorrow, okay!?」
「Did you hear that, No. 6? That was such an obvious tactic coming from a fraud. Since she can’t follow up on my demand right this instant, she’s trying to buy a couple of days to prepare. Until she’s ready, she’s going to be practicing how she’s going to deceive us.」
「Eeeeeeeeek!」
Between the two people that couldn’t act like adults, Snow opened her mouth as if she was a little frightened.
「Alice, were you always a denier of magic? I’ve come across them very rarely, but this is the first time I’ve seen such an adamant proponent. Also, my weapon is a magic sword as well…」
「That’s right, about that magic sword.. I want to extract its internal power source and see how it works. Let me visit your place later, Snow, so that I can dissemble a few of them for my research. 」
「That’s definitely a no from me.」
After leaving the three noisy people, Rose came to my side and lightly tugged on my clothes.
「Commander, I heard that you guys caught a Moke-Moke. Did you not bring back any gifts? Something like leftover meat…」
I asked one question to the Rose coveting for meat.
「… Well I did save you some, but you won’t start attaching ‘moke-moke’ to the end of your sentences after eating it, right?」
「…I, I think it’ll be…… alright……」
There are still many mysterious things about the animals of this world.
For now, let’s make sure Rose doesn’t eat any Moke-Moke meat.
Part 6
The day after we investigated the ecosystem of the Great Forest.
「Alice, you’re going to follow me tonight! I’m going to make sure you regret bitterly about calling Zenalith-sama a fake!」
「Oh? I’m going to disprove everything about the occult until you’re in tears.」
This situation became really annoying.
「Hey, how was it already decided that I’m tagging along? Whatever you want to disprove, this can be settled with just the two of you…」
「What are you saying, Commander!? Isn’t this an act of defiance towards Zenalith-sama!? In order to make sure someone like Alice doesn’t come along in the future, I obviously need a witness to see God’s miracle!」
「She’s right, No. 6. If there’s no conclusive evidence of what happened, then she’ll just make excuses later and deny this ever happened.」
……….
「Now you’ve said it, you foul-mouthed brat! Once you die, you’re definitely going to hell!」
「An android going to hell is pretty original.」
Damn, this is getting pretty scary and troublesome. I should’ve ran away from the start like Rose and Snow did.
「Now, let’s go! Today’s perfect because there’ll be a full moon tonight. So in order to gain a more powerful magic, I’m going to perform the summoning ritual on top of the hill.」
「Is that so. I see you’ve been busy last night planning something on that hill.」
「Waaaaaah!」
Ah, I really want to return asap and go drinking!
— — —Not so far from the town, on top of a hill with a great view.
While standing on top of the ground with her feet bare, Grimm spread out a sheet with a magic circle drawn on it.
After placing a cage, that was covered entirely in cloth so that we couldn’t see its content, on top of the magic circle, Grimm looked back at us and audaciously laughed..
「Heheh, tonight’s a special night! Alice, I’m going make that stony face of yours tremble with fear! Normally, I’d offer something to eat as tribute. But tonight, I’m going to offer up a living sacrifice! Behold! Inside the cage is something I got from the butcher’s shop, a poor and powerless living sacrifice……!」
While Grimm was raising the tension with her look of excitement, she took off the cloth covering the cage and……!
「……It’s so cute.」
「It’s so fluffy. Oi Grimm, you’re not actually going to offer up this rabbit as a living sacrifice, are you?」
Inside the cage was a bunny with bigger ears than those that were found on Earth.
Although she said she got it from the butcher’s shop, it seems like she didn’t check the content of the cage until now.
「Kyuu-…」
Inside the cage, a bunny, with its legs tied up, looked up towards Grimm and me, and let out a small cry.
After seeing that, Grimm swallowed her saliva and slightly lowered the club that she was holding…
「…C-commander, tonight is all the more special! Only for tonight, I’ll let you help me as my assistant! When I give you the signal, send that bunny to Zenalith-sama’s side…」
「I don’t want to do it either! You’re always boasting that you’re an archbishop of the God of Disaster! So how are you not able to do something like this!?」
Although I lived my life until now by dirtying my hands, I didn’t want to kill a cute bunny over something so trivial.
「You’re so spineless, Commander! Even though you say you’re a member of an evil organization, you don’t even know what that means! Also, Zenalith-sama isn’t a God of Disaster!」
「Sh-shut up! Don’t look down on Kisaragi! Even a member of an evil organization will have a conscience! Besides, if I could be that cold-hearted, then I wouldn’t still be a lowly combatant!」
While we were arguing to shift the responsibility onto each other…
「Kyuu!」
Along with that small cry, the bunny stopped moving.
Alice was holding in her hand the club that Grimm originally planned to use for the sacrifice…
「Will this be fine? Now, show me the next step.」
「Don’t you have a human heart!?」
「Yeah, where did you leave your conscience behind!?」
We shouted out our disapproval to Alice while she had the club over her shoulder.
「An android doesn’t have either of those things. Now, hurry it up.」
「Ah, stop it! I understand, I’ll do it, so stop pushing the sacrifice towards me!!」
While Alice was pushing the dead bunny towards Grimm against her will, Grimm had tears in her eyes as she laid the bunny down gently.
「Since I’m sick of a brat like Alice ridiculing me, I’ll show you how a serious archbishop looks like…!」
While Grimm started making a grand declaration, she began shouting some kind of incantation.
The magic circle began to glow along with the incantation. Grimm’s expression looked ecstatic.
「Oi Alice, isn’t this a little dangerous? More importantly, I’m someone who believes in the occult! I have a bad feeling about this!」
「The magic circle started glowing, that’s all. Isn’t it possible for a LED device to be under the sheet?」
Just when I was about to say something to Alice while she was leisurely going to check the other side of the sheet, the magic circle started glowing more and more— — —
「Zenalith-sama, the God presiding over the undying and disasters! Under your exalted name, please send me one of your servants!」
Along with Grimm’s loud call, the magic circle started glowing blindingly…..
At that place was a demon that resembled Gadalkand, one of the Demon King’s generals that I’ve faced before……
No, that was a giant devil standing there.
Part 7
『Finally, this is it! To think that you can summon me, you’re a skilled girl! I wonder how many centuries it’s been since I was last summoned to this world….』
The devil was standing on top of the magic circle, his figure was swaying like a mirage and flickering.
I guess his figure could be described as something like an astral body.
「Amazing, Grimm, you actually summoned one! And it looks like it’s something incredible!」
While I shouted that without thinking, Grimm was staring at the summoned devil and said in a quiet voice,
「Wh-who…..?」
「Oi.」
I pulled Grimm to the side and whispered in her ear.
(Stop saying things that’ll make me uneasy. You were the one that called that thing over here.)
(Even if that was the case, the thing that I was trying to summon was an undead, in other words, a ghost!? I was trying to summon an ancient, evil spirit but it was someone I don’t even know that came over…)
Although trying to summon an ancient, evil spirit was something that I couldn’t ignore, the devil in front of us was a higher priority.
Could I even forgive her if she apologizes by saying “Sorry, I made a mistake”?
— —At that moment, while I was having those thoughts.
Alice left us behind while we were whispering to one another, and stood right in front of the devil. She started speaking to that scary existence.
「Hey you. I see you’re using a pretty cheap hologram.」
……………
『Hologram? What is a hologram, little girl? I am an archdevil created by the evil god, Zenalith-sama. My name is….. Ah! H-hey, what are you doing!?』
Just when the devil was about to reveal his name, Alice grabbed ahold of the sheet with the magic circle drawn in it, and started shaking it.
4 - tpfeEbT
Each time she shook the sheet, the devil’s figure swayed. The devil yelled in agitation, but Alice didn’t show any signs of stopping.
『What are you doing all of a sudden, little one!? I thought you were the one that summoned me, how rude! I will no longer answer to you!』
「You’re too loud, you hologram bastard. Where did you hide your real body?」
While the android talked arrogantly as if nothing in the world scared her, the devil showed a speechless look.
『Oh? So you’ve realized that this body isn’t my real one. But in order for this body to properly exist in this world, that small amount of rabbit meat was too lacking.』
While the devil was talking on top of the sheet that Alice held, his figure started to waver— —
『If you want to see my true form, then offer the tribute necessary for my incarnation. And in return for your soul, I will grant a wish from your deepest desires! Little one, now’s the time… Oi, stop that! What are you trying to do all this time!? Why is it that you are trying to disrupt me!?』
The devil asked Alice in an anxious voice while she began rolling up the sheet with the magic circle drawn in it.
「I told her to call over a ghost. I never told her to call over a knock-off Gadalkand.」
『A knock-off!? You’re saying that I’m an imitation of someone else!?』
The devil was constantly ignored by Alice. It was then when I suddenly remembered something.
「Oi, you there, devils are those well known characters that grant three wishes, right!?」
「Commander! Although this might be too much coming from someone who’s established a contract with Zenalith-sama, I recommend you don’t make a deal with the devil!」
After I asked the question, as if the devil finally realized our presence, he looked our way.
『It’s as you say, little one. In exchange for your soul, I’ll listen to any wish you have! Now you, what do you desire… Stop, stop disrupting me every time! If the contract isn’t fulfilled, I can’t go back!』
Alice probably thought a device was attached to the back of the sheet because this time, she flipped the sheet over.
『Child, you’ve been doing incomprehensible things for a while. I’ll start with you. Tell me what you desire. After receiving the tribute, I will grant any wish.』
「Then for this genius that hails from Earth, make me two or three planets that humans can live on. Make sure each one has the same resources as Earth. Also give each one the Earth’s atmosphere from fifty years ago. A clean atmospheric composition, please.」
『Your wish will be granted… Huh, what? Earth? A planet?』
The devil stopped talking momentarily to the android that made a huge demand.
『are you an idiot? What do you mean by planets! Are you telling me to create two to three worlds!? Just how overflowing is your desire!?』
In response to the devil’s scream of objection,
「You were the one that said you’d grant me anything. It’s not like I tried to use a loophole and ask for more wishes. Oh, and do something about the energy problem. It has to be clean and easy to transfer. If you can’t even do that, then just give me an inexhaustible supply of energy.」
『Ener… what, what’s that? Can you ask for something I can do? You don’t want money or jewelry? Or things like wishing for like power, cursing someone you hate…』
Since he didn’t really understand what energy was, the devil listed alternative options.
「I have enough money and authority. Then eliminate every hostile being on this planet. The barbaric people of the demon king’s army, and then either the Moke-Moke or giant magic beasts…..」
『Isn’t this a massacre!? Ah, no, that would be impossible. I can’t grant a wish that’s practically akin to eliminating the whole world for just one soul!』
The devil was dumbfounded as he raised his voice in response to the android’s radical demand.
I somehow felt some sympathy towards the devil. I turned to Alice and,
「Oi, you should let him return now…」
「He said he was forced to stay until my wish was granted, so there’s no helping it. But still, a wish that he could grant… Now that I think about it, the toilet back at our base is clogged. Should I let him go in exchange for fixing the toilet?」
Realizing that it wasn’t a joke about letting him return in exchange for fixing the toilet, the devil started looking very anxious.
But then, as if he realized something, the devil raised his head.
『…..Th-that’s right, anguish! Any girl would want this. The inevitable anguish that awaits all women is…!』
「Androids don’t age. Deterioration is also solved by upgrading… That’s enough, so can you just go back now?」
『………』
Completely opposite of how he was when he was summoned, the devil looked lifeless with his head down while he silently vanished.
In the spot that was now silent, there was a somewhat awkward atmosphere forming.
Surrounded by that strange atmosphere, I idly muttered,
「…I wanted to wish for something like an orgy.」
「You can easily do that on your own once you become an executive. Don’t get tempted by such a suspicious thing.」
……I’m going to try my hardest in life starting tomorrow.
Because of Alice’s words, I became determined to accomplish great things on this planet— —!
「By the way, Alice… Do you now believe me that I’m not a fraud?」
「……」