"That year, her eyes were red almost every day, and at night, she would always cry by herself.
"That was also the year she grew up. In the past, when she dirtied her clothes, she would always get scolded by her mother, but her mother would still always be there to wash them for her. Once she left, there were several times I caught my girl washing her own clothes in the public tap nearby secretly... She was probably afraid to cause me trouble...
"Even though I admired her maturity, it made my heart ache.
"This is the photo she took after her high school exams for the university in Beijing. I personally sent her over there, look, there's a photo of both of us at Tiananmen Square..."
Father Song sighed deeply. "This was the year I fell ill and needed a huge sum for surgery. At that time, I had some savings that I wanted to leave for Sisi, but in the end, she managed to get enough money for the surgery.
"At that time, we were very poor. Sisi quit school to become a sales attendant at a mall. Every month, she would earn three thousand dollars which she would spend on my medicines."
Xu Jiamu frowned.
At that time, he was already with her, but after he had given her the fifty thousand dollars, she never asked him for another cent.
She was attending A college and sometimes, when she received calls from him, she would head over for the night, but would often leave early in the morning for lessons. Many times when he had scheduled a meeting with her, he would fetch her at the entrance of A college, hence he always assumed she was still attending A college, not knowing that she had quit school.
"Afterwards, she became an actress. There was once I visited her at set. The conditions were harsh, and it was winter at that time. She caught a cold and was running a high fever, but she still persisted on continuing with filming. It really broke my heart... There was also once when she seemed to have angered someone, enduring two slaps, her face was swollen and her clothes were tattered. She ran home and when she saw me, she just broke down..."
Father Song started to tear up. "At that time, she must have been devastated and helpless. She must have not been able to find anyone, so she came back, but I wasn't capable enough to help her. She stayed at home for about half a month before returning back to set. Afterwards, she seemed to realize that coming back would worry me so she never complained about anything anymore, but I knew that she must have struggled during those few years. On hindsight, I was really a useless father.."
Xu Jiamu suddenly remembered how at the door of City Hospital he had asked her why she continued to film even when her feet was swollen. At that time, she had said that she had endured the pain all the time...
When he heard that, his heart broke, and now it hurt even more. It was as if someone had stabbed a dagger deep into his heart, sending a sharp piercing pain throughout him.
They had been together for eight years… She had been lying beside him for eight years... That was about three thousand nights, but he'd had no idea that she was in pain, had been beaten, that she was sick, upset, happy, or had quit school...