The first time I met Ririina, I could see her shining.
From events in my early childhood I was bad with women. If it was only for a short moment it was still fine but I still wanted to avoid things like talking and getting close.
The fact that I couldn’t be of use as a prince this way is something that knew best of anyone.
However, regardless my heart and body would not listen to me.
I met Ririina when I was 13.
An age where, as royalty, it was more questionable not to have a fiancee.
But the me of that time absolutely couldn’t imagine a future together with a woman.
At such a time, suddenly, a light of hope appeared.
The first girl that I carried favor towards since I became bad with women, that was Ririina.
At first I was fascinated by her fighting figure.
And towards her who, without holding any interest in me, interacted with me normally I started holding onto a bit of good will.
That impetus was a trivial thing.
It didn’t take me long to realise that Ririina was a wonderful existence that wielded a glamour none of the other females I had met until then possessed.
I immediately exposed my feelings to my parents.
Obviously, I, who so far hadn’t held any interest whatsoever in women, had a girl I carried good will for.
The me at that time was desperate.
To fasten the connection to Ririina who I held my first feelings of goodwill for.
Knowing I was being unreasonable I brought up wanting to take Ririina as my fiancee to my parents.
The two of them were overjoyed, and 1 months later the matter of making Ririina my fiancee was settled.
However, that was from when the agony started ..
Case 1 Greetings
It appeared that it got decided Ririina would commute to the castle in order to undergo Queen training.
I couldn’t help but be happy every day.
However, because my body still wouldn’t listen to me meticulous caution was careful when seeing her.
When Ririina would find me she would give me a greeting.
However, her smile at that time was dangerous.
The first time I was granted that smile of hers from up close an electric current run through me.
In truth, at that moment I think my heart actually stopped for a beat.
Honestly, I wanted to exchange greetings with her with a smile myself, but the me then needed to pour his full efforts into even returning the greeting in a hasty, curt manner while making sure to avoid her eyes.
Ririina made a wondering face.
I’m really sorry.
I wonder whether someday the day that I can exchange greetings with you with a smile will come ..
Case 2 Practise
There was an occassion I got injured during sword practise.
It was only a graze but more blood than expected welled up.
And swiftly Ririina, who apparently happened to have observed the practise, came over to me.
For Ririina to watch my practise I was happy enough to soar the skies.
And she even tried to treat my wound.
Ririina touched my hand.
Aah, what a nice smell. (1)
To have Ririina this close to me .. if she was this close to me?
Uhwa—-.
I shook off Ririina’s hand and left the place behind as if running away.
S-she was that close.
My heart was beating with a vigour it had never before.
My face was hot. It should probably be terrifyingly red.
I can’t be showing this appearance to Ririina.
.. However, what was Ririina thinking of this me, I wondered.
To have someone dash off with full force the moment you try to treat them.
Aah, why can I not get close to Ririina.
The feeling of wanting to get close I have overflowingly much, but my body is not listening.
I wonder whether the day will come that I will become a cool man that can be close to Ririina while staying calm ..
Case 3 Social Party
Because I am a prince there are social parties that I must absolutely attend.
Which is exceedingly bothersome.
I’m definitely going to get surrounded by women .. (2)
Why do they have to come so forcefully?
Even though I have a supremely wonderful fiancee with the name Ririina.
Time and time again, without getting tired, and not even having anything interesting to talk about.
I am bad with women, but, well, if it isn’t in a small place one on one or similar I am sort of fine without having to escape.
However, even if I say being fine, if I don’t keep up my guard I would start trembling all over or even stiffening.
At one time there was an occassion that on a party Ririina got surrounded by several girls.
“Why must a country bred like you be the fiancee of Prince Leon?” (3)
“Ara, isn’t that surely because of her Father, the Prime Ministers, meddling?”
“I have heard that you aren’t fitting together with Prince Leon. Do you not think it would be better to return to your territory ahead of time?”
.. scary.
Kohon. How to say this, that’s impressive.
How can they actually express their disagreeability to that extend?
To beginn with that bunch doesn’t know how seriously Ririina is undergoing her Queen training.
However, regardless of how many complaints were thrown at her she listened to their story while floating a smile on her face.
Her dignity was on another level.
However, no matter how much Ririina seemed fine with that, I couldn’t bear it.
I don’t want Ririina to have a hard time.
Speaking of what I could do, it would only be to draw them away from Ririina!
I got closer to them as if I had only just now come this way.
Ririina and those bunch noticed me.
“Yaa, for all of you to be standing this far at the outer edge of the party, don’t you think it is a waste. Let’s go over there and talk a bit, what do you say? Ririina, you enjoy the party as well.” [1]
This way I got all of them who had surrounded Ririina away from her, and lead them to a seperate place apart from Ririina.
What I can do amounts to about this much.
I understand that it would have been better to instead be together with Ririina now, just the two of us. However, that was impossible.
My heart wouldn’t last.
And I would end up hurting Ririina even more like that.
.. however, truthfully speaking, I realised that this way was nothing but a failure.
That Ririina next to wall, was now standing there alone.
.. I’m sorry.
This time too I had been mistaken, after all.
I’m always thinking when watching Ririina’s reactions after my actions.
That through my actions I am causing her sadness, that I am making her exasperated.
What should I do about that?
I know the best method as well ..
But, I can’t do that.
After all, isn’t it to set her free?
Translator’s notes
[1] Wow, did he take lessons from Chris or what? He perfectly acted the noble prince (slightly snobbish perhaps, though it was only a single line, so ..) in front of them.
(1) Wait, what .. She touched your hand. What?
(2) Oh, the worries .. Though I do understand him. Even if he was socially competent without a fear of women, that could be troublesome. But oh the worries ..
(3) Fair question, to be honest. If I understood things correctly Ririina’s family isn’t particular high nobility to begin with. Not like that family cares or minds, I guess. But then I know next to nothing about nobility and their order of ranks.