Chapter 34
Qi’an, you once asked me where my injuries came from .
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Those injuries were from all the battles I experienced, and every scar is my honor .
My fellow soldiers and I are covered in glorious scars .
They all look forward to returning home and reuniting with their families after the war .
I too look forward to having a person who can bring me and my child back home .
To this day, I don’t dare to believe that you sit on that high seat .
Moreso, I don’t dare to believe I would one day like an emperor .
I like you, and it’s that kind of fondness I have never had for any other in my life .
It really is a strange feeling . Had you been an ordinary person, I would have taken you home regardless of your wishes and carried on this fondness for a lifetime .
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But you are the emperor . There are countless women around you, and perhaps I'm merely one of many for you .
From the moment I learned of your identity, I no longer held any extravagant hopes for you . Yet, here I am hoping you may see this letter and renounce that throne your persevered for, all for the sake of a woman .
Qi’an, the child has already been in my belly for over three months . We faced the enemies at close quarters and he accompanied me through many battles of life and death .
By the time I knew of it, he had lived in me for three months .
Uncle Song says he is very healthy .
He's very healthy, Qi’an . Our child is very healthy .
You may have countless children, but I may only have him in this life .
I truly wish to keep him well for a lifetime, and I truly, truly wish he will have a healthy life .
I am a general . Should the sovereign want the subjecet's death, the subject is obliged to meet death .
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But, I will be a mother as well .
As I rubbed the belly that carried him, I thought, would he take after you or me when he’s born?
I hope he’s a boy, so he can do everything I cannot .
Qi’an, in this life I have a clear conscience before the world, before the people, and before the monarch .
The sole person I feel guilty for is the child in my stomach .
I have never asked for help . I have never even knelt before my father or master .
In this life, I have only knelt before you .
Qi’an, I'm kneeling on the ground as I write every word of this letter .
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Qi’an, please!
I know it is not easy for you, I merely hope you may like me, and that it’s far from the extent of giving up your throne for me .
But Qi’an, the the child's only hope now lies with you .
I can only implore you .
Qi’an, I’m going to take a troop out of the city to attack the barbarians’ stronghold . If I am fortunate to return, I hope to see you . If, if I am not, then I hope this letter will never be delivered to you .
Respectably offered, Yan Ge
This is her handwriting; this is the letter she wrote for herself .
On the two large pages, her words were humble and earnest . Every tone and every character was pleading with him .
The night she left seemed to appear before his eyes . She was kneeling on the ground and was facing him as she grabbed onto his sleeves . Her head was slightly raised, and those tearful eyes had the appearance of silently enduring a love and hate for him .
His hands trembled, and his entire body followed suit .
His throat felt blocked . He opened his mouth a few times, yet was unable to make a sound .
How could this be, how could this be possible?
He could not connect her with the Marquis of Zhenbei at all, but when he thought back on her words and actions, he could not help but believe .
How can it be like this? How can she be Lord Ming Lan?
His vision darkened, and he was even unsteady .
After making arrangements for Song Wei, Eunuch Su walked through the doorway to see Emperor Yuan in such a state . He quickly went forward to support the emperor: “Your Majesty, what is the matter?”
As if seizing a life-saving straw, Emperor Yuan grabbed him with considerable strength and held on tightly: “Summon Luo family’s third daughter to the palace . ”